


Paradise Found

by hermioneclone



Series: The Witches Brew Verse [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Bisexual Ron Weasley, Bisexuality, Death of the Author Is A Plot Device, Demisexual Severus Snape, Demisexuality, Emotional Sex, F/M, Happy Ending, Happy Severus Snape, Lesbian Character, Minister for Magic Hermione Granger, Original Character(s), Original muggle characters - Freeform, Outing, Past Hermione Granger/Ron Weasley, Queer Families, Severus Snape Lives, Severus Snape-centric, Slow Burn, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-18
Updated: 2020-04-18
Packaged: 2021-03-01 20:34:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 59,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23693227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hermioneclone/pseuds/hermioneclone
Summary: Hermione Granger, Minister of Magic, on a much needed holiday after scandal rocks her world and publicly outs her husband, finds refuge in a charming New England college town. The last person she ever expected to find on her travels was Severus Snape, alive and well, running his own little cafe and fully immersed in the Muggle life he had built for himself. An unexpected bond forms that surprises them both, opening up possibilities they never dreamed of, even if it means leaving everything they know behind.Written for the 2019 Snape Big Bang.
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Severus Snape, Viktor Krum/Ron Weasley
Series: The Witches Brew Verse [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1706248
Comments: 14
Kudos: 195
Collections: Snape Bigbang 2019





	1. Prologue: Strangers in Paradise

**Author's Note:**

> This story started out with me wondering if I'd have enough material to get to the minimum for the 2019 Snape Big Bang and wound up with me writing almost 60,000 words. It's the first project I've actually finished in years and I am beyond thrilled to share this with everyone. The art is by the lovely [snapeislife](https://snapeislife.tumblr.com/) and can be found [here](https://snapeislife.tumblr.com/post/615786750816747520/my-first-contribution-to-the-2020-snape-bigbang) as well as embedded within the text.
> 
> **A few things to note:**
> 
>   * This fic is explicitly trans affirming. It was also partially written during JKR's latest round of TERF tweets, and it was impossible not to have that inform my writing. If this is a problem for you, this is not the fic for you. Any transphobic comments will be deleted.
>   * The outing bit comes in the prologue and isn't the primary focus of the fic, although it does act as a catalyst for much of the plot.
>   * Although this fic is rated explicit, there are really only two chapters near the end where this really applies. I'll make a note at the start of those chapters.
>   * With the exception of the title, the chapter titles with Paradise in them reference different songs, which I'll link to in the notes! The title/final chapter is a play on words with _Paradise Lost_. 
> 

> 
> Alright, on to the main event! Enjoy!

**2014**

“Hey, can we talk for a minute?” Ron asked as Hermione stepped out of the kids’ room after having read them a bedtime story. His voice was hesitant, and he was gripping his forefinger anxiously, a nervous tick she hadn't seen in years.

“Of course,” Hermione replied, following him downstairs to the living room. Something had been off for a while now, she had felt it but hadn’t been able to put her finger on any one thing to even try and bring it up with her husband. At first she thought it had to do with him leaving the Ministry. True, he had been miserable that last year, but a big life change was still jarring, even a positive one. But although he seemed much happier working in the joke shop with his brother, something else still felt off. So she had pushed ahead, feeling him pull away but feeling helpless to do anything about it. Maybe now she was going to get the answers she so desperately wanted, would finally know how she could help him. 

Hermione took a seat in her usual recliner, looking up at Ron expectantly as he hovered at the arm of the chair. “Er, can I get you some tea?” he asked, apparently unable to meet her eyes.

“Ron,” she said, in that tender voice reserved just for him, as she reached out a hand to grip his. “Please, just tell me what’s wrong.”

Ron sank onto the low table in front of her, burying his head in his hands. “Everything,” he groaned miserably. 

“Talk to me,” Hermione insisted, leaning forward to cup Ron’s face in her hand. “I can’t help you unless I know what’s going on.”

Ron looked up, a bitter expression on his face, though years of experience told her that his ire was directed at himself alone. “That’s the thing, Hermione. I don’t think you can help me with this.” She wanted to ask more, but before she could, he took a deep, steadying breath and said, “I’m bi.”

Hermione felt an overwhelming sense of relief. “Oh, is that all? I thought something dreadful had happened.”

Ron looked confused but a bit buoyed by her response. “You knew? How? _I_ didn’t know.”

Hermione grinned. “I saw the way you were with Viktor in fourth year. Honestly, Ron, I’m not sure what you were most upset about, that he took me to the ball or that he didn’t take you.”

Ron winced. “Ah, yes. Viktor.” The miserable expression returned. “I’ve been talking to him about this. Figured he had a bit of experience in this area.” 

Humming her agreement, Hermione nodded. The world might have been shocked when Viktor had come out a few years after the war, but he had confessed the truth to Hermione in one of the long letters they exchanged. She missed those years sometimes, having someone removed from her daily life yet who was also still invested in its outcome. “That seems like a wise choice.”

Ron took another shaky breath. “The thing is,” he continued, looking like he was going to be sick. “The more we talked, the more I started thinking about all the things that I didn’t have a chance to explore. I don’t know if I would have made any different choices if I’d understood what those feelings meant...and I don’t regret loving you,” he said firmly, finally meeting Hermione’s gaze. He looked like a scared little boy, and it was easier to focus on that than the fear mounting inside her. 

“How long have you been sleeping with him?” she asked, trying to keep her voice light but unable to keep a hitch out of it. 

“What?” Ron replied, flabbergasted. “No, never!” he insisted. “Honest, Hermione. I’d never do that to you. We never even kissed.” He paused. “But I’ve found myself wanting to. And that scares me.”

“Oh,” Hermione said, at a loss for what to say. Her whole world was tilting on its axis, but so was his, and he clearly understood the implications of what he was saying. She knew that he loved their family, that he wouldn’t blow all of this up on a whim. “Are you asking me for a divorce?” Tears leapt unbidden to her eyes, and she didn’t have the energy to fight them back.

Ron gripped his hair in frustration, looking like he might pull tufts out he was yanking on it so hard. “No. I don’t know. I just...I need to figure some things out about myself. And before I went any further, I thought you had a right to know. Besides, I know what this could do to your career, the last thing I want to do is blow all that up over some unresolved teenage angst that I’ve been carrying around for the past decade and a half.”

Hermione couldn’t help a small smile. “Just my luck, you finally have an emotional depth larger than a teaspoon.”

Ron smiled wanly at her joke. “Thanks mostly to you.” He shook his head. “I wish I knew the answer. I wish I could say nothing will change, but that feels like a lie. And I can’t lie to you, Hermione,” he said, his voice sounding desperate, pleading. 

Before she could overthink it, Hermioner pulled him into a tight hug. Ron shook, his tears soaking into her sweater as he clung to her. She closed her eyes, wondering if this would be the last time they would be like this. She held on a little tighter. “We’ll figure something out,” Hermione said gently to Ron as he settled down, pulling back and looking embarrassed.

“So, you don’t hate me?” Ron asked, looking hopeful if a little red around his tearstained eyes.

“I don’t think I could ever hate you, no matter how much you infuriate me sometimes,” Hermione replied softly. “I’m glad you felt you could tell me this.”

Ron nodded absently. “Aside from Viktor...I haven’t told anyone. Not even Harry.”

“Oh Ron,” Hermione sighed. “Do you think you will?” The idea of having to sit with this secret twisted at her stomach. The thought of keeping something this big from Harry, not being able to turn to him and Ginny for support was overwhelming.

After a moment’s hesitation, Ron nodded. “Not right away, but yeah. I think this is something I need to do.”

“Can you just let me know when you do?” Hermione asked, her voice tight and sounding far too small to her ears. “I don’t want to accidentally out you.”

Ron’s eyes widened. “Oh shit, I didn’t think of that. Merlin, I don’t want to put that all on you. I’ll tell him and Ginny tomorrow.”

“I don’t want to pressure you into anything,” Hermione assured him.

Ron shook his head, looking determined. “You’re not, I swear. I’m just a coward.”

Hermione snorted. “There are many things I’d call you, Ronald Weasley, but coward isn’t one of them.” Ron grinned at her sheepishly. “I’ll support you however I can,” Hermione said, meaning it. Ron looked like he might cry again. “I’m not going to deny that I’m a bit scared at the outcome of you figuring things out. But I want you to be happy.”

“I don’t deserve you, Hermione,” Ron breathed, grinning hopefully. “But I’m glad I have you, for as long as you’ll have me.”

Hermione bit her lip. “I have a feeling it’s the other way around.”

“No,” Ron said, gripping her hands tightly. “I’m afraid you’re stuck with me. Whatever changes...that won’t. It can’t. There’s a lot I’m confused about right now, but that’s one thing I’m sure of.”

Hermione hesitated, needing to know. “What about the kids?”

Ron looked nervous again. “How do you think they’ll take it?”

“They love you, Ron. That won’t change.”

Biting his lip, Ron nodded. “I suppose we need to talk to them. I need to talk to them.” He rubbed his face tiredly. “I’m not sure if I’m ready for the whole world to know yet.”

Selfishly, Hermione felt a rush of relief. She was already facing an uphill battle in her campaign for Minister of Magic. Despite all that had changed in the past decade and a half there was still a deep seeded resistance to the idea of a Muggleborn being Minister. She couldn’t afford a scandal, and a world that couldn’t handle her blood status wasn’t likely to be understanding about her husband’s sexuality, particularly if it meant the dissolution of her family. Her heart twisted at the thought, desperately wanting Ron to choose her, to choose their life. But she also knew that his choice had to be freely made; anything less, and he'd be weighted down with bitterness and resentment the rest of his life. They would all be better off with him figuring things out. In the long run, at least. “You need to do what works best for you,” she managed to say.

“And for you,” he replied earnestly. “I know the timing of this is awful. Part of what took me so long to come to you was knowing what was at stake. I won’t do anything to jeopardize the campaign, Hermione. I know what you’re up against, and I won’t be the reason you lose. You’ve worked too hard.”

Hermione smiled tightly. Even now, they were on the same page. “I appreciate that.” They sat in an awkward silence for a few moments, something they’d never really shared before outside of an argument. It was unsettling. “I think I’ll turn in now,” Hermione replied, feeling as drained as he looked. 

“Right,” Ron replied, looking awkward. “Er, I can sleep in the guest room if you’d like. Give you some space?”

Hesitating for a moment, Hermione nodded. “I think that might be best.”

“We’ll make this work,” Ron promised, an earnest look on his face as if that was his heart's greatest desire.

Nodding, Hermione silently left the room. She quickly got herself ready for bed before shutting herself in their bedroom, not bothering to turn on the lights. She felt her way around the familiar space, almost making it to the bed before tripping on Ron’s slippers. Tears started flowing as she righted herself, the reality of the situation hitting her square in the chest. Her job had taught her how to compartmentalize, to face a crisis head on and deal with her emotions later. Hermione had managed to get through her conversation with Ron, to be the supportive wife and friend that he needed right now. But the time had come for her to process, to come to terms with the reality in front of her. Because whatever Ron said, she knew their marriage was over. Not because of his sexuality, at least not on her end. She saw the light in his eyes when he talked about Viktor, it was so subtle he probably didn’t realize. Hermione hadn’t seen him like that since the early days of their dating and marriage. She could see that no matter how much he wanted their life to be enough, it wasn’t. All she could do was figure out a path forward.

But that was a task for the morning. Right now, all she could do was wrap herself in the bedcovers that still smelled like Ron and cry herself to sleep.

* * *

**2018**

Severus tossed his keys in the dish on the table in the entryway, shrugging out of his coat. The weather had just begun to turn, slipping suddenly from muggy summer to the cool crisp evenings that came with fall in New England. The cafe had been busy all day, the students had only been back a few weeks and were already overloaded with books and assignments. Severus had to admit, he approved. And not solely because it meant a boost in his business as desperate college students sought out the best cup of coffee in town to fuel their studying.

He liked students much better this way, he’d found in the years since he had reinvented his life. Their most annoying tendencies were much less bothersome when he wasn’t the one having to grade their papers or bear the brunt of last minute all nighter drivel. Perhaps it was his advancing age, perhaps it was regret for his own failings as a teacher, but he felt protective of the hordes of students who flocked to The Witches Brew. He wasn’t above giving a free cookie to a student who looked on the verge of tears or a coffee to one looking like they were losing the battle with their exhaustion. He also made sure that all edible food left at the end of the day was donated or provided free of charge to those who needed it. What profit he lost he more than made up in the religiosity of his regulars. They knew he would take care of them in a pinch, and they returned the favor. 

It was a simple life, not one he’d ever envisioned himself having or wanting. But he found it was good to work with his hands, good to make a small difference in the lives of hundreds of people every single day. It was his small penance, and he couldn’t imagine being happier.

He mostly lived a Muggle life. He had taken the liberty of casting protective charms on his home and the whole building that housed the cafe. When he was outside of either location he wore a charmed pendant that would distract anyone he didn’t want finding him. And, of course, he still practiced Occlumency at night; otherwise he was plagued with dreams that didn’t let him sleep for days at a time out of fear of returning. But it was easier this way, removing himself from his past life as much as possible. 

There was one guilty pleasure he allowed himself. Severus had arranged for the _Daily Prophet_ to be delivered, under an assumed name of course. At first it was purely practical; he wanted to make sure that no one was on to him, that no one had figured out that the body found in the Shrieking Shack was actually a reproduction generated by a particularly skilled _Gemino_ charm. He needn’t have worried. All the paper could focus on was Potter. At first, he started reading those articles out of a sense of obligation. After half a lifetime of protecting the boy, he couldn’t help it. But after a while, he had to admit to himself that he did care, that seeing Potter’s name pop up on a routine basis gave him a fluttering sense of relief every time, that all of his sacrifice had been worth it. It was easier now, to see the boy through Lily’s eyes. She would have been so proud of him. Severus would never admit it, but he was proud too.

Potter’s wasn’t the only name making a regular appearance in the _Prophet_. Miss Weasley’s name appeared, first as a player for the Harpies, later on more and more bylines. After a few years, Potter’s name was added to hers, first in a wedding announcement and later in her professional work. Unsurprisingly, Miss Granger had thrown herself into rebuilding the government with the same abandon with which she had approached her schoolwork. He’d watched from afar as she rose quickly through the ranks, becoming the youngest Minister of Magic ever, not to mention the first known Muggleborn to hold the post in recent memory. It seemed fitting, like a final nail in the coffin of Voldemort’s ideology. They had truly won.

The paper always came in the evening, which suited Severus just fine. He could unwind from a hectic day, eating his solitary dinner while taking a walk though his old life, with plenty of time to regroup before having to face the next morning. 

Severus walked to his window, hoisting up the frame with considerable effort. He would need to oil it again. Reaching out, he grabbed the paper from the ledge where the owl knew to leave it and quickly shoved the window down to shut out the suddenly chilled night air. He opened the twine binding the paper as he walked to the kitchen, intending to reheat the stew he’d made over the weekend. He was only halfway there when he caught sight of the headline, stumbling in surprise.

_Minister Miffed: Cheating Husband Exposed with Seeker Star_

Frowning, Severus detoured to his favorite armchair, flicking on the lamp as he went. The first picture under the headline was old, an exceptionally unflattering headshot taken during a crisis two year previous, where contractor negligence had led to the biggest violation of the Statute of Secrecy since it had been initiated. At the time, the image showed strength, a take no prisoner’s attitude that would restore order and reassure a frightened public. Now, out of context and with a bit of heavy shading, she looked like an angry shrew.

Which was clearly the point, a fact made clear when he noticed that Rita Skeeter had authored the piece. He almost skipped it, knowing that nothing good could come from the trash that woman wrote (his own exposé had been both horrifyingly false and uncomfortably close to the truth). But sheer curiosity egged him on. Next to the picture of the Minister, there was a clandestine photo of two men, one with recognizable red hair, the other short and athletic. He began to read.

_In a shocking turn of events, Ronald Weasley, husband of Minister of Magic Hermione Granger, the first Muggleborn Minister in nearly a century, was caught with his pants down so to speak with none other than former Seeker for the Hungarian National Team Viktor Krum. Your reporter can exclusively reveal that the men were caught in a, shall we say, intimate moment in full view of a camera crew that happened to be outside the Minister’s residence._

Severus snorted. What a shocking coincidence, if he believed in coincidences. 

_Lest this be written off as a one time misunderstanding, further inquiry has led to a treasure trove of juicy details. The two were caught on camera on more than one occasion, repeatedly displaying more than friendly affection. It’s also reputed that Krum has spent multiple holidays with the Weasley-Granger family over the past few years. Were the two carrying on an affair under our dear Minister’s nose?_

_Not so, dear reader. My source indicates that not only did Minister Granger know full well for years that her husband had left her for a man, she also was in on the cover up. The real question is this: were any government funds used to hide this homosexual extramarital affair? Thus far, none of the interested parties have responded to our request for comment. When pressed, a staff member at the Minister’s office stated that they did not comment on idle gossip and that I should mind my own business. If that isn’t fishy, I don’t know what is._

_A full investigation into this matter should be undertaken by the Wizemgamot to restore the public’s confidence in this administration. Or, perhaps, it is high time for a change in leadership at the Ministry, giving Granger more time to focus on raising her two children, who clearly are in sore need of a positive parental influence._

Under the main article, there were several other headlines on the same topic, including: “Potter and Weasley: Bromance or Secret Lovers?” and “Mother of Cheater Berates Reporter for Invading Family’s Privacy and Outing Son”. 

Shaking his head, Severus folded up the paper. He didn’t know how much of the story was true, but he had enough for one evening. Hoisting himself up, he shuffled to the kitchen, stomach growling in anticipation of his supper.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sadly, Viktor doesn't actually make an appearance in this fic. However I really love the pairing of him and Ron (who will be coming back!) and hope Viktor will return when I eventually write some one shots in this verse.
> 
> This chapter title comes from the song [Strangers in Paradise](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WFrUsa5SUv0).


	2. Chapter 1 - The Witches Brew

Hermione inhaled deeply, soaking in the peace of the quiet autumn day. Leaves swirled around lazily in an errant gust of wind, one taking up a brief residence in her curls before she hastily brushed it away. There was just enough of a chill in the air to justify a light jacket, but the sun’s rays hadn’t yet lost their strength, warming the earth with their gentle glow.

She didn’t know if it was the change of scenery that made her so relaxed or just the fact that she was off the clock, removed from her duties as Minister for a whole week barring a full fledged crisis. She had also put an entire ocean between her and the scandal that refused to die.

Hermione had questioned the wisdom of going on holiday while the aftershocks of Ron’s outing were so fresh. The time off had been planned well in advance, some well deserved rest and relaxation. But she had envisioned curling up in front of the fireplace in her own living room, catching up on all of the books she never had time to read anymore. Ron had offered to take Hugo for the week and Rosie was at school. It had all been settled.

Then their entire world came crashing down. Ron assured her that he was okay, that he was glad he didn’t have to hide anymore, but she could see the pain that the method of the reveal caused him. The vulnerability that he was trying to hide from her. Hermione couldn’t blame him; the idea that he was hiding a part of himself for her benefit had gnawed at her since she had come to terms with the fact that their marriage was over. But keeping quiet had been Ron’s idea, not hers. She told him they could get out in front of this, could spin it in a way to highlight the positive and own the moment. Ron insisted that what happened in their personal lives was nobody’s business but their own. Hermione suspected he was rethinking that position now. 

What was done was done, however, and Hermione did her best to emphasize the privacy violation that had occurred purely for political ends. Thankfully most people followed her logic, and the widespread backlash that Rita Skeeter had undoubtedly expected had been short lived, diminishing fairly quickly to a trickle. The most vocal critics were concerned more about the potential for corruption as a result of the perceived coverup, something she could easily counter. It was a relief that the focus had shifted away from Ron, away from the initial outcries about the negative influence he must be having on their children. But she was still bearing the brunt of the handful of laser focused attacks. At least ten howlers a day ended up in her inbox, with a few somehow managing to make it to her home despite the fact that all of her correspondence was supposed to be screened.

That had settled things. She needed to be out of the house while it was thoroughly secured. Hugo would stay with Ron as planned; he had been quite alarmed by the last Howler, which had been one of the rare ones to focus on the “abomination” she was married too. It had taken a good hour to calm her son, to assure him that nothing had changed, that his father was still the same man he’d always known, and just because other people said mean things didn’t change how they felt about him. All while maintaining a stasis charm and alerting her security staff so they could try and figure out who had gotten this message through the screening. Hermione considered staying with Ron for the week, worried about being away from Hugo for so long after the traumatic episode. But Ron assured her that he had everything covered, that he could always get in touch with her in case of emergency. And with a promise to call to check in daily, she went. 

Hermione had no idea where to go other than far away from her imploding life. She also wanted to avoid major wizarding settlements. It wasn’t beyond reason to assume that the news had spread beyond her jurisdiction, and she wanted to blend in on this trip. Just be any thirty nine year old on holiday. 

Looking around, this small New England college town seemed the perfect choice. She no longer could pass as a traditional aged student, much to her chagrin, but perhaps she could be mistaken for a cool but stern professor. Like if McGonagall had been a Muggle professor. She could pull that off for sure. For a moment, she lost herself in this alternate life, one where she walked deliberately along familiar streets as she shopped and ate and had a marvelously average life inspiring the next generation of learners. She would live in a little cottage within walking distance of campus and would have a cat, and maybe a wife. With a sigh, Hermione shook her head. There were times where she wondered if she went down the right path career wise, wanting to make the biggest impact she could. But for now, her choice had been made and she had to live with that for better or worse.

Since she did not in fact live here, Hermione took her time in front of each shop, peering into the windows of most, daring to venture into one or two. Her attention was caught by a brightly colored mural of a woman next to a door with stairs descending into darkness. Hermione quickly retreated when she realized it was a feminist sex shop; she was far from a prude, but the last thing she needed was to be caught coming out of a place like that with a bag full of dildos. This trip was about avoiding the scandal, not adding to it. 

Shaking her head and walking briskly away, she rounded the corner and didn’t slow until an unusual sign caught her eye. It was shaped like a witch hat, looking more like something one would see in Diagon Alley than in a college town in America, even one as eclectic as this. Elegant golden lettering proclaimed the establishment to be The Witches Brew Cafe. Hermione stood there for a moment startled, and as she watched at least twenty people exited and entered the small building. Taking this apparent popularity as a sign of a quality menu, Hermione decided to duck inside. She had been walking for a while and could use a nice hot cup of tea to warm up. Hermione winced, remembering the sad teabags the proprietor of the bed and breakfast she was staying at had proudly provided this morning. Perhaps best to stick with a local beverage.

Frowning, Hermione slipped in the door. She looked back and forth from the inside of the shop to the windows which showed the sidewalk from where she just came. Somehow, the interior of the cafe was much larger than it should have been based on what she had seen outside. Yet every time she tried to get a closer look, everything seemed to meld into proper proportions. And while the place was bustling, the three people at the front flying behind the counter to keep up with the rush, the room didn’t feel crowded, as if there was always room for one more. Hermione shook her head. She was almost certain there was magic here, so subtle even most witches or wizards might miss it, aside from the sign hanging onto the street. 

Deciding not to risk exposure, having to uproot herself yet again in search of solitude, Hermione turned to leave. Just then, a pleasant singsong voice called out from the counter. “Next!” The sound startled Hermione, who realized belatedly that she had ended up in line as she had taken the place in and was in fact the person who the young thirty-something woman with the shortly cropped flaming orange spiked hair was speaking to. It seemed like it would be rude to turn and run, and doing so would bring attention to her that she just didn’t want at the moment. Taking a deep breath, she stepped up to the counter, eyes roaming frantically over the menu.

“I’ll take that herbed tomato and cheese salad, a morning glory muffin, and, er...a coffee.”

“For here or to go?”

Hermione knew she should leave, should return to the solitude of anywhere less populated, where her accent wouldn’t make her stand out. Yet she heard her own voice saying “Here”.

Nodding, the woman jotted down her order. “How would you like your coffee?” she asked, glancing up.

Hermione blanched. “The, er, normal way?”

The woman grinned. “Ah, that’s right. Can I venture that you’d prefer a nice cup of tea?”

“Coffee’s fine,” Hermione replied hastily, feeling panicked. 

The woman’s smile softened. “The owner here is actually from the UK too,” she said, nodding towards the grey haired man at the register, his back to them as he dealt with a customer. “If you’d like, he keeps some of the good stuff on hand for special requests. He’ll make sure it’s done nice and proper.”

Hermione grinned back at her shakily. “That would be lovely, actually, thanks.”

“Thought so,” the woman, Penny according to her nametag, said with a knowing look. “We’ve got a tea service coming up, boss,” she shouted down the counter. The man just nodded and raised a hand in acknowledgement without looking at her. “That will be $13.94. Pay down at the end,” she said turning back, ripping something off her pad and slipping it to Hermione. “Take this with you and give it to the Professor to ring up.”

Hermione shot her a quizzical look. “Professor?”

“It’s a nickname,” Penny stage whispered conspiratorially with a wink. “It drives him up the wall, but we all know he’s a softy under that gruff exterior.”

“People can be full of surprises,” Hermione said, biting back a laugh. She glanced back at the quickly lengthening line forming behind her and instantly felt guilty for holding things up. “Thank you,” Hermione replied, taking the paper from Penny and beginning to fish around her bag for her wallet filled with American Muggle money. She was still looking when she reached the end of the counter and handed the paper to the man at the till without glancing up at him. 

Hermione had just located her wallet and had her fingers poised to open the change purse when an all too familiar voice that she hadn’t heard for nearly two decades said, “That will be thirteen nintey-four.” Hands going slack, the wallet hit the floor with a thud as Hermione’s head shot up to face the man at the register. He looked much older than Hermione remembered him, but a bit softer too, like the past twenty years had been kinder than his first four decades. His eyes widened as he saw her face, looking about as shocked as she felt. So much about this situation was bizarre, but the strangest part by far was that it appeared that Severus Snape was wearing his emotions on his face for all to see.

“Sorry,” Hermione said, ducking down to retrieve her wallet and desperate to break the tension.

“Nevermind that,” Snape said carefully as she stood to face him again, no trace of the sneer that had been his trademark when she was in school. “This one is on the house. It’s the least I can do...Minister.” So he’d been keeping tabs on the Wizarding world. And the knowing look in his eye told her that his information was up to date. Despite her curiosity, Hermione wanted to bolt, to pack up her bags and find some other place where presumed dead professors wouldn’t impose on her escape from reality. “Will you be dining in?” 

“I’d love to.” The words came out of her mouth before she had a chance to register what she said. But it was too late to turn back. This new open book Snape looked far too pleased, in an albeit subtle way, that she didn’t have the heart to backtrack. Besides, Harry would never let her live it down if she didn’t at least try to find out more information.

“Wonderful,” Snape said, sounding sincere. “Might I suggest the table in the nook over there?” he said, gesturing to his left. “Someone will bring out your order when it’s ready.”

“Thank you,” Hermione said evenly, fishing out what she owed for the meal and stuffing it into the artfully designed tip jar next to the register. While she doubted a free meal would be cause for scandal (and she sincerely hoped it would not, since that would mean that the press had found her despite all precautions), but force of habit prevented her from outright accepting it. She made her way over to the designated table, which had a lovely view of an elaborate garden and the antics of the local squirrel population, and began to fidget anxiously. Of all the people she had anticipated running into on this trip, and taken careful pains to avoid crossing paths, Snape had been the absolute last person on that list. Hell, he hadn’t even been on the list.

“I hope you don’t mind me pouring at the table,” Snape said softly, making her jump a little as he set down a tray with a teapot and the rest of her food, which he placed in front of her on the table. “I didn’t know how you take it and I find this is the one thing I can’t trust my staff to do properly.” Hermione turned to more carefully examine him now that a cash register was no longer blocking her view. Snape wore a burgundy apron tied neatly around his waist and neck, just like the rest of the employees, a thick pad and pencil sticking out of one of the pockets. The uniform covered a comfortable looking forest green sweater with a collar that rose all the way to his chin and earthy brown pants that were impeccably pressed. Small rectangular wire rimmed glasses were perched on his nose, giving him the air of an academic despite the rest of his outfit. It was such a far cry from his perpetual batlike appearance that if not for the familiar hook of his nose and glint of amusement in those dark eyes she might have mistaken him for a stranger. The only word she could use to describe his new look was cozy, a word she never in a million years would have thought she would use to describe him.

“Just milk, no sugar, thank you.” Snape sloshed just the right amount of milk in the bottom of the teacup before carefully measuring out the tea to the proper level. “Do you get a lot of requests for tea service?”

Snape smiled, yes, smiled, as if fondly remembering something. “Not more than I can handle. It started out as my private stash that I raided for a desperate student who’d come here to study. It’s mostly word of mouth, mainly expats, but I do get a handful or requests from people with a more refined pallet.”

He set the teapot on the table, and with nothing left to occupy his hands, he began to fidget nervously. “Yes?” Hermione prompted, unable to stand the anticipation.

“Could I… would you mind if I joined you?” he asked, sounding inexplicably nervous. Suddenly the pieces fell into place; she was the top authority figure of the Ministry of Magic. If anyone could blow up the life he had created for himself here, it would be her. Of course he wanted to talk to her, to find out what she wanted.

Hermione frowned, looking around. The place was just as busy as when she’d walked in if not more so. “I don’t mind, but I don’t want to inconvenience you,” she said quietly. “You seem awfully busy.”

Snape shrugged. “I was overdue for a break. Besides, the next shift just started, so with the overlap there will be plenty of people to get through the lunch rush.” He smiled sardonically, looking for a moment like the man she had known. “In any case, should a crisis arise, I am quite close at hand.”

Hermione bit back a smile. “True,” she said, gesturing towards the chair opposite her. “Please, do join me.” She watched him carefully as he poured himself a cup of tea and settled in, seemingly fascinated by the steam rising off of his cup. It was clear she would have to take the lead here. “You look well.” Snape’s head snapped up to look at her, looking a little embarrassed. “This life suits you.”

Snape’s mouth twitched as if it wanted to make a smile again but knew better. “I like to think so.”

“That woman, Penny...she called you Professor.”

Snape snorted. “I assure you, my days of terrorizing pupils are long over. It’s purely a nickname derived after my ill advised mention that I had once taught.” He smiled wryly. “It turns out that I like students much more when I am not the one who has to read the drivel that they churn out the night before.”

Hermione smirked, blowing on her cup before taking a sip. Pure heaven. “And you can profit off making sure they are caffeinated enough to produce said drivel.”

Snape shrugged, taking a sip of his own drink. “I suppose. Though as surprising as it may seem, I do actually enjoy giving them somewhere to go.”

“Surprising is the word for it,” Hermione agreed. “Though it’s a surprise in the very best way.”

Looking exceedingly uncomfortable, Snape cleared his throat. “And you have had quite the successful career. Unsurprisingly, of course. Everyone always knew you would go far.”

Hermione raised an eyebrow. “I was under the impression that you were never impressed by me.”

A muscle twitched on the side of his face. “On the contrary. It just wasn’t prudent to show it at the time.” 

“Oh,” Hermione whispered, not knowing what to say. 

“I do apologize for the manner in which I behaved towards you,” he continued, speaking quickly as if he had to get the words out before they vanished into the ether forever. “In particular the teeth incident, though I know that was only one of many other horrendous moments.” His face looked pained, contrite in a way that seemed foreign on those features. “In order to maintain my cover, I had to be mindful of all aspects of my behavior. Nothing could indicate that I was in any way sympathetic to Potter or anyone else he approved of.” Snape winced. “I fear I may have taken it too far, though the end result was the desired one.”

Without thinking, Hermione reached a hand out and placed it on top of his. Snape stiffened under her touch, jumping slightly and causing a bit of tea to slosh out onto the table. “I know,” she assured him. “I forgave you a long time ago for all that. Harry did too.”

“Oh,” Snape exhaled, sounding relieved. “Good.”

They fell into relative silence for a few moments as they sipped their tea, the bustle of the cafe continuing in it’s joyful melody as they sat there, unsure of how to proceed. Hermione decided it was time to go for broke. “We knew it wasn’t you, you know,” she began, looking up at him. “In the Shrieking Shack.”

“Did you?” Snape said guardedly, seeming more like his old self than he had in this entire encounter.

“Harry noticed that the bite was on the wrong side. I figured out what you had done, it was a magnificent copy otherwise.”

Snape smiled tightly. “Well, I was in a bit of a hurry.”

“The only ones who knew the proper placement of the bite were me, Harry and Ron. Harry felt that you had sacrificed enough, that you deserved a chance to have a life free of the burdens that haunted you there. We swore never to tell anyone, not to contradict the narrative you clearly wanted.” She smiled softly. “Clearly we made the right call.”

Snape nodded awkwardly. “It was certainly most appreciated.” 

Hermione hesitated. “I have to tell him I saw you. I can’t keep this from him.”

Snape sneered at her bitterly, his old walls back up in an instant. “So I can be hauled off to Azkaban after all?”

“Goodness, no!” Hermione exclaimed. “I just think Harry would like to know how well you’re doing. And we don't keep secrets."

Snape looked appropriately abashed. “Sorry. Old reflexes die hard.”

Hermione grinned. “Can’t say I blame you. But Harry made sure your name was cleared. Even if you never came back, even if you didn’t know...he thought you deserved recognition for your part.”

Snape winced. “I assure you, it was not nearly as noble as he makes it sound.”

“Regardless,” Hermione continued, smirking. “There are no charges hanging over your head that the Ministry kept from the press or anything like that. If you ever were to return you would be free to do so. Some might even regard you as a hero.”

Snape snorted. “Are you one of them?”

“Hardly,” Hermione said grinning as she took a bite out of her muffin. “I’ve been in politics long enough to know that there can be a big difference between the idea of the hero and actual heroics.” She paused, growing serious, looking him straight in the eye. “Real heroes don’t want the recognition.”

She was pleased to see Snape look appropriately flustered. “Er, well then,” he muttered. “Enough about me. If you didn’t come here to hunt me down, can I assume that your sojourn to our little town has something to do with your recent troubles with Rita Skeeter?”

Groaning, Hermione buried her face in her hands. “Merlin, it was in the papers here as well?”

“I have a subscription to the _Prophet_ ,” Snape assured her. “Under an assumed name, of course.”

“Of course,” Hermione echoed, feeling a little better as she sat back up in her chair. 

Snape looked at her in hesitation, like he didn’t know what to say. “I am aware that the woman has a unique relationship to the truth…” he began gingerly.

Hermione barked out a laugh. “And yet this time she was more or less correct in her facts.”

“I’m sorry,” Snape said, with what seemed like sincerity.

Hermione shook his words off. “I’m fine, really. I’ve known about Ron for ages. I just wish our private affairs hadn’t been aired so publicly.” She shook her head. “The only reason Ron and I stayed married was because of my career, he was so determined not to ruin things for me that he didn’t think of how it would affect him.”

Snape arched an eyebrow at her. “I’m surprised to hear you so...civil.”

Hermione smiled sadly. “Did I expect this was how my marriage was going to turn out? Definitely not. But Ron and I have stayed partners through everything, it was best for the kids, best for us. I couldn’t hate him for being true to himself.” Hermione bit her lip, realizing how much she had just revealed. “I’m sorry for going on and on like this,” she apologized.

Snape smirked, though there wasn’t the old malace behind it. “It might surprise you, but I’ve gotten really good at lending an ear.”

Hermione gave him a grateful smile. “Thank you. It’s just been a long time since I talked to anyone so removed from the situation.” She narrowed her eyes in what she hoped would seem like a playful manner. “Unless of course you are a plant working with that Skeeter woman to weasle information directly from the source.”

Snape put on the airs of mock indignation. “I would never!”

“Good.”

Penny approached the table, looking uneasy. “I hate to interrupt, but we’ve got a situation in the back, Sev.”

Snape frowned, his whole demeanour suddenly switching as he settled back into management mode. “What kind of a situation.”

“The pipe we’ve been having issues with is acting up again and you’re the only one who ever seemed to be able to get it stopped. It’s like you have the magic touch.” Hermione raised an eyebrow at Snape, who pointedly ignored her as she smirked into her tea. 

“I’ll be right there,” he told Penny, hoisting himself up out of his seat before turning to Hermione. “Please don’t leave before I get back, this shouldn’t take long.”

Hermione pulled a book out of her bag. “I’m on holiday, remember? No reason to rush anywhere.”

With a tight smile and a curt nod that seemed almost friendly by his standards, Snape hurried to the back. Penny, however, lingered, a curious gleam in her eyes. “Is everything to your satisfaction?” she asked pleasantly, though Hermione was sure that was not the question she really wanted to ask. 

“It’s all delicious, thank you,” Hermione answered dutifully. “The tea was a nice touch, thank you for recommending it.”

Penny gave her an awkward grin. “No problem.” She took a deep breath, like she was about to take a plunge. “Listen, I don’t mean to pry...it’s just, Severus never talks about his past and it seems like you two go way back.”

Hermione smiled softly. “In a manner of speaking.”

“Oh,” Penny replied, looking awkward. “Are you his kid?”

Throwing back her head, Hermione let out the first real laugh she’d been able to have since that horrible story broke. Her eyes began to water from the force of her mirth, but through them she saw a horrified Penny who looked like she knew she had stepped in it. “Goodness, no,” Hermione choked out, gesturing for Penny to take the abandoned seat. “I think technically date wise it could be possible but absolutely not. I used to be a student of his.”

Penny’s eyes widened as she sat down. “Did the two of you…?”

Hermione bit back another laugh. “Far from it. He was a different person back then. But even so, there are some lines I don’t think he’d ever cross.”

“Good,” Penny sighed with relief. “I’d hate to have my illusions shattered.”

Hermione took a bite of her salad, which had been mostly ignored while she had talked to Snape. “I think it’s safe to say you got the better part of the deal.” She looked at the young woman, who couldn’t be more than five or six years younger than her, curiously. “How long have you known him?” Hermione was careful to avoid names; while it seemed clear that he was still using his given name, she had no idea by which surname he went by these days.

“Oh, a decade at least, probably more. I started working here part time when I was a student,” Penny began, picking at her cuticles nervously. “Severus hires a lot of students, he doesn’t mind the turnover because he usually manages to find people who will stick around as long as possible. Most not as long as I have but, well…” Penny’s face tightened and Hermione swore that her eyes looked a little glassy, like they held unshed tears. 

“Are you okay?” she asked hesitantly.

“Ugh, sorry,” Penny said, wiping at her eyes. “I’m usually fine but you caught me on a sentimental day. Anyways. My parents cut me off after I came out to them,” she explained, her voice thick with emotion.

“I’m so sorry,” Hermione said with genuine concern. “It’s not the same thing, but...a friend of mine recently was outed and I saw firsthand how awful people can be.” 

Penny gave her a wan smile, visibly relaxing a little bit. “Don’t I know it. I still had a year left and almost nothing to my name. I didn’t know what I was going to do, where I was going to live once term ended. I asked Severus if I could take on some extra hours, he managed to get the whole story out of me and didn’t rest until I had somewhere safe to stay for the summer. Let me work full time too. And helped me figure out all the paperwork so I could finish school on time. By the time I’d graduated, I found that I couldn’t leave this place. It was the only home I had, really.” Penny shrugged, looking sheepish. “It sounds corny, but we’ve kind of become family.”

Hermione smiled at the woman kindly. “That sounds lovely. I’m glad you found each other.”

Penny grinned fondly, lost in a better memory. “He was the first person I called when I got engaged,” she said, wiggling a finger with an engagement ring made out of a purple stone and a wedding band. “He’s been more of a father to me than my own dad.”

Never in a million years would Hermione ever have thought Snape of all people capable of such affection, taking on the burdens of someone else purely out of choice and not obligation. And yet...the man she had shared tea with this afternoon certainly was. While he was undeniably Severus Snape, he certainly wasn’t the Snape that she had known. She felt an unexpected thrill of excitement at the prospect of getting to know who he was now, who he had been allowed to become outside of the shadow of his past. 

This was going to be an interesting week.

* * *

The leak was easily resolved once Severus was sure no one was looking. He rarely used magic these days if he could help it, it helped him live in the moment, to separate his present from his horrible past. But he was damned if he was going to pay another cent to the plumbers who caused this problem in the first place.

He couldn’t help but linger in the back, taking this momentary reprieve that had fallen in his lap. In spite of his best efforts, a five foot three reminder of his old life had waltzed in the door. He should be freaking out, he should be contemplating his flight. He might even consider a memory charm if it had been anyone but the Minister of Magic. Modifying _her_ memory would be a surefire way to get discovered. Yet inexplicably, he felt relief. For the first time in years, possibly in his entire life, he didn’t have to hide anything. Even in this life he’d built for himself he had secrets. Now presented with an opportunity to be an open book for the first time ever…in spite of himself he didn’t want to let that go. 

Even if it was with Granger. Minister? He didn’t even know how to address her. It seemed inappropriate to think of her by her given name, but everything else felt too formal or like she was still his student. Which would be quite uncomfortable, since he couldn’t deny that the woman who had walked in that door made something stir inside him. What exactly that was he wasn’t sure, but he felt drawn to her in a way that would never have made sense in their past life. 

Severus shook himself back to the present. This was absurd. He couldn’t afford to get lost in hopeless fantasies. Besides, if he didn’t get out there soon, Penny might have scared her off without saying goodbye. Taking a moment to compose himself again, he grabbed a cardboard takeout container and filled it with coconut chocolate chip bars and some peanut butter squares. Thank goodness for magical antibodies that provided immunity to any food allergies. Making his way into the busy cafe, he saw that Penny was back behind the counter. She caught his eye and smirked at him knowingly. “You like her,” she mouthed, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively.

Rolling his eyes, Severus ignored her, making his way back to the table by the window. Granger had finished the food she’d ordered and, unsurprisingly, had her nose buried in a book. “Reading anything good?” he asked quietly, not wanting to surprise her.

Thankfully, she wasn’t as immersed as she appeared. Deftly plucking out the bookmark and slipping it in her place, Granger placed it back on the table. “Not sure yet. One thing no one warned me about when I took the job is that there’s hardly any time for pleasure reading.” She eyes the box in his hand curiously. “What’s that?”

“A little treat. On the house.” She opened her mouth to protest. “I insist. I don’t think some dessert will constitute a bribe.” 

Taking the box from his hands, she peeked inside, eyes lighting up. “You made these?”

Severus smirked, taking his seat. “You’d be surprised at how well my skills transfer.”

Granger wiggled her fingers while deciding what to take before snatching one off the top like a bird of prey. Her eyes slid shut after the first bite, a satisfied smile sliding onto her face. “I don’t know,” she said finally. “I think these might be rich enough to count as a bribe.”

Severus fought and lost the battle against a smile. “Then let’s call it a gift between friends.” Granger’s face shot up, looking surprised. “If that’s not too bold an assumption.”

Granger grinned. “It is. But I think I’d like that. It’s been a long time since I made a new friend. Everyone wants something, you know.”

Severus suddenly felt inexplicitly nervous. “I don’t, I assure you.”

“I wasn’t suggesting…”

“I know.” They sat in an awkward silence for a few minutes. “How long are you in town?” he asked finally, chancing a look up at her. 

“A week,” she informed him. “I just got in last night.”

“Do you have any plans?”

Granger shrugged. “I looked around a bit today. I’d like to visit a few sites. I hear that we aren’t too far from Salem, I would love to learn more about the fascinating history there. And of course find some reading time. I think that’s on tap for the rest of today, actually.”

Severus ignored the sinking disappointment in his chest. “Of course. Er, if you’d like, I’d be happy to show you around a bit.”

Granger looked confused. “I don’t want to impose, I’m sure you’re needed around here.”

Severus shook his head. “I hardly ever take time off, Penny is more than capable of running the place on her own. It is what I trained her for, after all. Besides,” he pulled his phone out of his pocket and shook it in front of him. “I’m only a ring away.”

Granger’s jaw dropped. “You. You have a cell phone?”

Severus smirked, slipping it back in his pocket. “I run a business in 2018. Of course I own a cell phone.”

Shaking her head, Granger took another bite of the peanut butter bar. “I truly have seen everything now.”

“I’m full of surprises.”

“Well, in that case…” Granger said, grinning slyly. “It would be lovely to have a guide.”

“Perfect,” Severus said, rubbing his hands. “Stop by tomorrow and we’ll make plans?” 

“I’d like that,” Granger said with a nod. “Besides, where else can I get a proper cup of tea?”

“Exactly,” Severus replied, closing the matter. “I suppose I should let you get to your reading.”

Granger stood, gathering her things. “I’m really glad I ran into you, Professor,” she said, smiling at him kindly. 

“Please,” he said, holding out a hand. “Call me Severus, won’t you? Friends, remember?”

“In that case, I must insist on you calling me Hermione,” she said, taking his hand and shaking it with a practiced firmness. 

“Noted,” Severus replied, pulling his hand back after a beat too long. Granger, no, Hermione had seemed to linger too. He wouldn’t dwell on it. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a business card. “If you need to reach me in the meantime,” he explained, placing it in her hand.

Hermione studied the card closely. “So you go by Prince now?”

Severus shrugged. “I needed a less distinctive name when I went into hiding, now didn’t I?”

Hermione smirked. “And yet you picked one that could be easily traced back to you if the right people tried looking.”

Severus shrugged. “Maybe I’m just that sentimental.”

Hermione snorted. “See you tomorrow...Severus,” she said with a knowing grin. 

“Tomorrow,” Severus agreed, smiling that dratted smile again. Before walking away, Hermione grabbed him by the forearm and gave a gentle squeeze, walking away before Severus could put two words together.

“So, what’s the deal with you two anyways,” a voice said from behind him, making him nearly jump out of his skin. His hand was halfway to his wand out of habit before he registered that it was Penny. 

“How many times have I told you not to sneak up on me like that,” Severus growled, piling the dishes onto the tray to take back to the kitchen.

“I was perfectly noisy,” Penny insisted. “It’s not my fault you were lost in your own little world.”

“I don’t want to talk about this, Penny,” Severus said with gritted teeth. Of all the people in this life, Penny had been the only one he’d considered telling the truth. But he hadn’t, he had felt the need to keep things seperate. And it seemed too late to go back now. 

“Suit yourself,” she said with a shrug, taking the tray from him carefully. “But if you change your mind, you know where to find me.” Penny started making her way to the kitchen but turned back to face him. “You’re allowed to be happy, you know.”

Severus frowned. “I am happy.”

Penny shook her head, balancing the tray on one hip. “You do so much for other people, I know that better than anyone. But you never do anything for you. You’re allowed.”

Severus winced. “I’ve found that being selfish never leads anywhere good.”

“It’s not selfish to take care of yourself. To find people who make you happy,” Penny sighed. 

“I have plenty of people in my life who make me happy,” Severus bit back. “Your family for one thing.”

Penny gave him a look that always made him feel like she was secretly a Legilimens. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it. She’s a bit young, but she’s cute! I can tell you like her. And I think she might like you too.”

“We’ve known each other for far too long for that,” Severus chuckled, unable to stay mad at Penny for long. “Come, we need to go over the schedules. I’m going to be needing some time off.”


	3. Chapter 2 - A Meeting of the Minds

The next morning Severus couldn’t help but jump every time the chime above the door jingled from the moment the cafe opened. He had decided to come in as usual, only to leave when, or rather if, Hermione actually showed up. Yesterday he had been sure she would follow up, but late into a sleepless night he came to the conclusion that she had been just humoring an old man and would vanish to continue her holiday in peace. He couldn’t actually blame her; he of all people understood what it meant to not want to be found. 

After he’d dropped change for the fifth time, Penny smirked at him knowingly. “Don’t say it,” he grumbled, grudgingly accepting her help picking it up off the floor.

“I don’t know what you are talking about,” she replied in a far too sweet voice and a wicked grin. The bell rang again and it took every fiber in his being not to turn around to check. Penny looked over his shoulder and her grin widened. “Your girlfriend just walked in,” she said under her breath, giving him a wink before he could reply. Shaking his head, Severus turned just in time to see Hermione approach the counter, smiling at him nervously. Something inside him twisted in a pleasant way he was entirely unaccustomed to. He pushed it aside, needing to stay focused lest he say something embarrassing.

“Good morning,” he said, feeling a little silly at how forced it sounded. 

“Morning!” Hermione replied, sounding far too chipper for so early in the morning. Severus had been waking up before dawn for years now and he still couldn’t muster any kind of enthusiasm until at least nine o’clock. 

“What can I get you today?”

Hermione shrugged, not even glancing at the menu. “Tea, of course.”

“Any breakfast?”

Hermione hesitated. “I did eat a little already at the bed and breakfast,” she confessed a bit guiltily. “I tried to sneak out but they accosted me with muffins.”

“Where are you staying,” Severus asked, curious. 

“The Grey Squirrel,” she informed him. “It’s a really nice little place. And the owner seems nice, just, er, very intense.”

Severus chuckled. “I’ve known Carol for years, that is certainly an accurate description.” He pointed to the display case, which was still overflowing with treats this early in the morning. “And she’s been buying her baked goods from me for at least the past decade. So you technically have eaten breakfast from here already.”

“I suppose,” Hermione said, looking at him nervously. “But I was hoping to eat something while actually in this building. With some company, if you can spare the time?”

“I’m free the rest of the day,” Severus told her. “I’d be happy to join you.”

Hermione grinned. “Good. I’ll have whatever you have.”

Nodding, Severus switched seamlessly into food service mode. “Any allergies I should be aware of?” Hermione arched an eyebrow at him with a look of exasperation. “Right, sorry. Force of habit, industry hazzard.”

“How much do I owe you?” she asked, reaching for her purse.

“Nothing,” Severus insisted, trying to sound as stern as possible. Hermione rolled her eyes, slipping a twenty dollar bill into the tip jar. “You do know how much you put in there, yes? I know it’s not the, er, currency you are familiar with.”

“And yet I do know how to count,” Hermione countered, a little edge in her voice that dispelled any further argument. She was good; he could easily picture her handling the usual bumbling and inept politicians around her to make sure things got run in a proper way. It was a brief flash of the woman she had become that was both enlightening and confusing. “Your employees will be getting some nice tips this week. Mind, I said your employees, you don’t get a cent since you are so intent on giving things away. We both win.”

“Touch é ,” Severus replied. “Though if you want to eliminate all fears of impropriety, you could always join me at my place for breakfast.” His eyes widened the second the words were out of his mouth, realizing what they sounded like. “I mean, I didn’t intend, I assure you…I apologize for being so forward.”

Hermione grinned at him, looking a little too pleased by his blunder. “Relax. I understand,” she assured him. “I would love to see where you live, though. If that’s still on the table. I’d love to see anything you’d like to show me about your life here.”

“I’d like that,” Severus said softly, surprising himself a bit that he actually meant it. “I’ll go fetch our food and then we can go after we eat.”

* * *

Hermione couldn’t remember the last time she felt so full outside of eating at the Burrow, where second helpings were encouraged to the point of being expected. Everything Severus served was delicious, and it only shocked her a little that he cooked or at least developed the recipes for most of it. She had jumped at his suggestion to begin their tour with a walk, feeling anxious to get moving again.

As they walked down some of the same streets she had walked the day before, Severus pointed out little details she had totally overlooked. It felt like something out of an unexpected dream. As he spoke she saw flashes of the man she remembered, but she couldn’t possibly imagine the Snape from before with the sincere glint of enthusiasm and adoration in his eyes this man did as he showed off the town he clearly loved. Perhaps that was why she felt so instantly comfortable with him. There was enough known by both of them to not be total strangers, but neither of them knew these versions of themselves. It was delightfully exciting, albeit a bit terrifying.

“So,” Severus began after he seemed to exhaust all of his historical factoids. “I hear you have children?” 

Hermione smiled proudly as she nodded, instinctively pulling out their pictures from her bag. She couldn’t pass up a chance to show them off, particularly when they were not here to get embarrassed. “Rose and Hugo,” she said, pointing at each of them, both children waving up at her from the small moving photograph. “Rosie just started her second year at school, Hugo’s off next year. I still can’t believe how big they’ve gotten.”

A look she couldn’t decipher crossed over Severus’ face. “They look like happy children.”

Hermione nodded as she put the photo away, not wanting to risk anyone else seeing the wizarding photograph. “My job makes having a normal life tricky, but I do my best to keep them away from the worst of the nonsense.”

“I’m sure you do your best,” Severus said in a voice so full of certainty she felt like she had no choice but to believe him. “Are they anything like you were at that age?” He winced. “Sorry, is that weird?”

“Only a little,” Hermione replied with a grin. “Both of them are brilliant, Rosie is more like Ron, less likely to overthink everything. Hugo takes after me, he’s a bit shy but I think he’ll grow into his own. I think the past year with his sister off at school has helped; she has a way of pulling focus. It’s been nice watching him grow outside of her shadow a bit.” She looked over hesitantly at Severus. “Do you have any children?”

Severus let out a self deprecating little laugh that was more like a huff. “Goodness no. The idea crossed my mind once or twice, but the opportunity never came up. Besides, we both know how good I am with children.”

“It’s different when it’s your own,” Hermione said softly. “I know people say that but it’s actually true.”

Severus’ face hardened a bit. “Not always.” He shook his head, as if shaking off bad memories. “Why risk it? Not everyone has the parenting gene.” Hermione felt her cheeks burn in embarrassment. She knew only vague outlines about his past from what Harry had shared. She didn’t know all the details, but she did know that his home life as a child had been less than ideal. 

“I don’t know,” Hermione began softly. “When I talked to Penny yesterday, she seemed to think otherwise.”

“Well,” Severus said gruffly, though Hermione was fairly certain his tone was less from aggravation and more from emotion. “That’s a different situation entirely.”

“Families come in many forms,” she said simply, knowing better than to push her luck. “I’m glad that you’ve found people who accepted you for who you are.”

Severus snorted in disgust. “At least who they think me to be. They don’t know.” Hermione stopped in her tracks. Severus had already taken a few steps ahead before he noticed, and turned back, frowning. “You can’t possibly be surprised by that.”

Shrugging, Hermione quickly caught up. “I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t know the nuances of the Muggle/Magical relationship in the United States,” she admitted. “But even under our Statute of Secrecy there are exceptions for trusted friends and family.”

Severus’s face shifted into a blank, neutral expression that should have felt familiar but was such a contrast to their recent encounters it unnerved her. “It was imperative that I remain off the radar. You know how our kind get when we spot one of our own in the wild. I had to be careful.”

Hermione looked at him skeptically. “You managed to successfully survive for over fifteen years as a double agent, working against arguably the most powerful Dark wizard of all time,” she deadpanned. “If anyone could avoid detection, it would be you.”

A hit of amusement flickered across Severus’ face, and he seemed to relax infinitesimally. “Perhaps,” he replied at last, resuming their walk and gesturing for her to follow. “But I didn’t want to take any unnecessary risk. Besides,” he added with a shrug. “I had decided that the safest solution was to live as a Muggle. I had to take certain steps to get into the right mindset. I’ve had limited experience in that area, you know, and the little I had was nearly twenty years out of date.”

“Okay, that’s fair,” Hermione conceded. “But then why name your cafe something so obvious? It’s a little on the nose, don’t you think? Talk about potential breaches of security and drawing attention to yourself…”

This time he really did smile, the shadow of the derisive amusement she remembered outshined by a still surprising warmth. “The cafe came later. I’d been living here a few years by then, a number of people were pushing me to open. Besides, the beauty of it is that everyone thinks it’s a lesbian thing.”

Hermione frowned, confused. “Why would they think that?”

“The school and the town have an, er...reputation. Some see it as everything that is wrong with the world. Most around here wear it as a badge of honor.”

“Does that bother you?”

Severus shook his head. “As long as we have customers I don’t care who comes through those doors as long as they respect everyone else.” He winced. “Unfortunately, a lot of the same rhetoric that fueled our little conflict has been popping up in the Muggle world much more aggressively the past few years.” He shook his head sadly. “I can’t expect them to learn from our mistakes, but I do wish they would learn from theirs.”

“Ugh,” Hermione groaned in frustration. “That’s a little too close to work for holiday.”

Severus gave her a sympathetic look, though his eyes glinted with amusement. “Ah yes, how  _ is _ Brexit going?”

“Nowhere, hopefully,” she grumbled, glaring at him.. 

“Consider it dropped,” he said with a smirk. “In any case, we’ve arrived.”

Hermione wasn't sure why she was so surprised as she looked up to see the quaint Victorian style house before them. Perhaps she was influenced by her many years of seeing Severus only in black or only experiencing his dour demeanor, but the last thing she’d ever have expected was for him to have brought her to a lilac colored house.

“It’s a historic building,” Severus replied, a hint of amusement in his voice as he correctly interpreted her stunned silence. “The historical society has regulations about the color and sticking to authenticity.”

“Ah,” Hermione replied, biting back a smile. “I see. And you are okay with being told what to do?” she asked quizzically. 

Severus shrugged nonchalantly. “The library is worth it.”

Hermione perked up eagerly. “You have your own library?”

“Naturally,” Severus said as he led the way up the front steps, fumbling in his pocket for a key. “I considered opening a used book store for a time, but then I realized I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to sell most of what I collected, so I quickly dismissed the idea.” Door open, he stood back, gesturing for her to enter ahead of him. “After you.”

There was no other word to describe the interior except cozy. The woodwork in the front hallway was unpainted, and the artfully carved banister was shellacked until it shone. The walls were painted a rich emerald green and were artfully adorned with nondescript but matching knick knacks between globed light fixtures that at one time were powered by gas. “This is gorgeous,” she whispered, feeling a bit in awe.

“I’ve done a lot of work on it over the years,” Severus explained, shutting the door behind them. “It was a bit of a mess when I bought it, but I could see the potential.” He hesitated. “It was nice to be able to work with my hands. To see something positive come out of my work. I hadn’t been accustomed to instant gratification in that area as you can imagine.”

“This is amazing.”

Severus gave her a quick tour of the ground floor, including a kitchen so fabulous that she almost wished she liked to cook. Hermione wondered if it would be an odd request to ask to take a picture of it for Ron; he would have done almost anything for a space like this. She decided that this new friendship, or whatever it was, was a bit too fresh to make the attempt. They wound up in a living room, which was filled with furniture that actually felt as fabulous as it looked.

Hermione’s gaze fell on the photos above the mantle, and she stood to get a closer look. Severus was in two. One seemed to be on opening day at the bakery, the other showed him looking awkward while being presented a gigantic cake with the number 50 emblazoned on the side. Despite being Muggle photos, Hermione could see the moment play out as it was captured, the discomfort masking genuine shock and pleasure at being thought of. It was a tender moment and the emotion clearly shone through.

The other photographs mainly featured Penny at various ages, the youngest was with a gawky young man, though most of the pictures showed Penny with a woman who clearly seemed to be her partner and what looked like their daughter.

“The two of you seem close.” She had gathered as much from her brief conversation with the woman at the cafe, but she was dying to hear Severus’ side of things. The idea of him having and acting on familial feelings still seemed so foreign a concept, even if it tracked with everything she’d seen since coming to this place.

“She’s like the daughter I never got to have,” Severus said quietly, joining Hermione in looking at the photos. “It wasn’t intentional. She needed help and for once I was in a place to openly give it.” He picked up the one where Penny was still practically a child. “Our situations were entirely different, but I saw a lot of myself in her. I know what it’s like when your parents can’t love you the way you need to be loved. I didn’t have a positive older role model to lean on. But I could be that for her. Things just kind of went from there.” He gazed at the photograph with a fond nostalgia that was touching.

“Does Penny’s wife find it weird that you have a picture of her and an old boyfriend on display?” Hermione asked curiously.

Severus shook his head. “Oh no, this is Ace before she transitioned.”

Hermione felt a rush of guilt and embarrassment. “I’m so sorry, I had no idea.”

Severus raised a hand to stop her from rambling. “It’s fine. You wouldn’t have had any reason to know. You’re not a local and haven’t met her yet. But now you have all the information.” There was an edge to his voice, as if daring her to say something awful. 

“Not a problem. Thanks for letting me know so I don’t step in it with either of them.”

Severus nodded his approval. “This was taken on their first date. I insisted, to both of their mortification.” He placed the picture back on the mantle. “They met at school, actually. There’s a program with some of the nearby colleges where students can enroll in courses across the different campuses. They became friends and Ace used to hang out here until Penny got off her shift. Of course at that point Ace wasn’t out to anyone yet, so neither of them thought the other could possibly be interested in them.”

Hermione grinned. “Naturally.”

“Ace had seen how I’d handled everything that happened with Penny, so she came to me one night and told me everything. At the time I was woefully unprepared but thankfully I didn’t scar her for life. She was so worried about what Penny would think, that she would turn on her when she found out.” Severus grinned. “What she didn’t know was that Penny had confided how worried she was about her friend. She could tell something was bothering Ace and wanted desperately to help. So I urged the two to talk and thankfully things went well. And the rest is history.”

“That’s incredible,” Hermione said softly. 

Severus shrugged. “It’s life.”

“No, that you’re secretly a love guru.”

Severus sorted. “Hardly.” He gestured to the hall. “Come on, there’s something else I’d like to show you.” Hermione quickly followed him up the gorgeous staircase, meeting him by a heavy looking oak door. Severus placed his hand on the handle, glancing back at her in anticipation. “I think you are going to enjoy this.”

Curious, Hermione wasted no time following him inside and instantly gasped. The walls were covered floor to ceiling in books. The room had to be two stories tall and had towering windows crowned with elaborate stained glass designs. A ladder rested along a track on the perimeter of the room, something out of  _ Beauty and the Beast _ , a movie she had enjoyed thoroughly dissecting with a magical lens when her parents had taken her to see it during her first Christmas holiday from Hogwarts. 

“How is this even possible?” she said, looking at him in awe, hardly able to tear her eyes around from the magnificent sight around her.” 

Severus smirked. “I have my ways. Now, if you thought this was impressive,” Severus said, gesturing to the room as he walked over to one of the book cases and gestured for Hermione to join him. She eagerly followed, looking awestruck as she took in her surroundings with a greedy kind of glee Severus knew too well from personal experience. Once she was close enough, Severus prodded the volume of  _ The Crucible _ and with a slight lurch the shelf and the floor under their feet began to rotate, moving until they were in the next room. 

Hermione looked at him in amazement. “I didn’t actually think that was a real thing.”

Severus shrugged. “It might not be. Despite trying to live as a Muggle, I may have taken, er...a few liberties.” 

Slowly, Hermione walked around the windowless room, examining their surroundings. “What is all of this?” she asked, curiosity strong in her voice. 

“I’d packed up anything I cared about long before the end,” Severus explained. It was weird to confide this part of his life to anyone. Dumbledore, for years his only confidant, had been dead at his hand by the time he’d started his preparations, and talking to a portrait wasn’t quite the same. And of course no one from his life here knew anything about his life from before. But despite his lack of practice, speaking to Hermione felt natural, like the words came from his lips without effort. Another bizarre sensation. “I kept it all in this bag.” he added, picking up a well worn leather satchel.

“Expandable charm?” Hermione asked approvingly.

“That’s right, you did something similar,” Severus said, suddenly remembering. Was that where the idea had come from? When Phineas Nigellius told him about how his portrait had been unceremoniously shoved inside an impossibly small bag? It had been too many years to remember correctly. “It was too risky keeping it at the castle,” he continued, fingering the supple leather. “I thought if I had to flee, I could at least stop at Spinner’s End. As it turned out, my estimation was right; I’d come and gone before anyone thought to come there.”

Hermione snorted. “Yes, we were quite busy ending the war.”

Severus shook his head. “I waited. In the forest. A strong disillusionment charm can work wonders when people have better things to be worrying about. I needed to know. If it wasn’t over, I still had a job to do.”

Turning her attention on him a bit uncomfortably, Hermione said quietly, “So you heard everything? What Harry said?”

Severus winced. “I would have preferred a less public declaration, but then again, that’s not really Potter’s style.” He noticed her frown and quickly continued. “But I must admit, I would have given anything to see His face when he learned the truth.”

“I was more focused on Harry than anything,” Hermione said in a soft voice. “Finding that your friend has risen from the dead will do that to you.”

“Understandable.”

“But I don’t think He believed it, not really. I don’t think Voldemort-” Severus inhaled sharply at the name and she gave him a look. “I don’t think he thought he could be defeated. Even at the end.”

Nodding gravely, Severus dropped the bag back on the shelf on which it had rested for almost twenty years. “Sounds about right.”

“So,” Hermione continued, her voice filled with a cheeriness that sounded just a little too forced; she clearly wanted to change the subject. “This is everything from your past life then?”

Severus nodded. “I couldn’t have these things lying around as I built a Muggle life for myself. But I couldn’t bear to let them go.”

Hermione grinned, picking up a thick well worn volume. “I see we have some overlapping interest in reading material.”

Severus crossed the room and carefully took the book from her hands, the old binding leaving a slightly sticky residue on his hands. His fingers traced on the faded golden letters emblazoned on the cover:  _ Hogwarts, A History _ . “My mum gave this to me when I turned eight. I suspect she thought it would take me a few years to get through it. But I couldn’t put it down, I read it over and over again those years before I went to school.” He sighed heavily. “It was supposed to be my escape,” he added quietly. “Instead it became my new prison.”

Hermione studied him carefully. “It might have taken longer than you’d hoped, but it looks to me that you’ve finally found the place that can make you happy.” She blushed furiously. “Sorry, was that too forward?”

Biting back a smile, Severus shook his head. “Not at all. It happens to be the truth.”

“Can you tell me more about that?” Hermione asked eagerly. “What it was like to leave it all behind and start over?” Her eyes widened. “Only if you want to, of course.”

“It’s nice to have someone to tell,” he explained honestly. Hermione seemed to relax at his words; he wondered if she had been expecting a furious diatribe if she crossed a line. He wouldn’t have blamed her. These days Severus reserved his rage for people who deserved it, like the transphobic little shits at the insurance company who had routinely denied coverage for Ace. What was the point in paying for health insurance for his employees and their families if they couldn’t actually access the care they needed without his intervention?

“It seems like you have friends here, though,” Hermione insisted, taking a step closer. 

“I do,” Severus conceded with a nod. 

“Would it really be so bad to tell them?” Hermione asked, sounding annoyingly earnest. 

“What’s the point of reinventing myself if I were to drag all of that along with me?” he replied mildly. He knew, of course, he could never really outrun his past. But to be looked at by people he cared about with adoring eyes rather than hatred and disgust? It meant more to him than he could articulate. “I didn’t bring you back here for this,” he said, a carefully placed note of finality in his voice. Deciding not to look for her reaction, Severus walked purposefully to a shelf and pulled out the book he’d wanted to show her.

“What’s that?” Hermione asked, thankfully going along with his subject change and letting the subject drop. 

“It’s this radical new invention called a book…” Severus glanced back in time to see her roll her eyes. 

“I’m not even going to dignify that with a retort,” she replied primly with a put upon air of innocence.

Crossing the room, Severus placed the book in her hands. “When you mentioned you were interested in Salem, I thought you’d enjoy this.”

“ _ A Most Horriffik History of The Witches of Salem _ ,” she read aloud, flipping open to the first few pages. “You brought this from home?”

Severus twitched at the word, wanting to correct her. This was home. But that would just mean going back to unpleasant topics. “No, I do from time to time dip my toe into the local wizarding scene. In disguise, of course. Though this one I found about fifteen years ago in a used bookstore. It was in among Muggle books, but I could tell that it was magical in origin. I avoided the place for a year, worried that I could have been spotted, before I determined that it must have wound up there on its own.” He gestured to the exit, looking at Hermione who seemed absorbed in the book already. “The lighting is much better in the library proper, shall we?”

Hermione looked up, grinning sheepishly at being caught reading rather than listening to him. “Sorry.”

Severus waved her off. “The chairs are more comfortable in there too.” Looking relieved, Hermione nodded and followed him out of the room, wasting no time in flipping open the book and tracing a finger down the table of contents. “Would you like something to eat? I could make us some lunch.”

“I don’t want to trouble you…” Hermione began, but he quickly cut her off. 

“It’s no trouble at all. If you’d like I could give you a few minutes for closer inspection?” he added, nodding towards the book.

Hermione shook her head, hugging the text to her chest. “There’s time enough for that later. I’m enjoying our conversation.” Her face fell quickly, concern replacing the happy glow she’d sported since he’d handed her the book. “Unless you’re not.”

Severus gestured for her to follow him. “Don’t be absurd.”

“It’s not that absurd,” Hermione mumbled, though she didn’t actually sound annoyed and followed him back downstairs. Severus bit back a grin and decided not to comment. He was enjoying this easy banter between them, even with the stumbles they both seemed to be taking. Was this what it was like to be a normal adult? “So,” Hermione asked, sliding onto one of the barstools at the center island once they entered the kitchen. “Did this kitchen come before or after the cafe?”

Severus frowned, thinking back. “About the same time actually. I replaced a few of the appliances early on, but I didn’t do the complete remodel until after the cafe was turning a profit.” He reached for a loaf of bread and dug a hunk of cheddar cheese from the refrigerator. He held it up without looking back at her as he searched for an apple. “Any problems?”

“Several, but dairy isn’t one of them,” Hermione replied cheekily. 

“Clever,” Severus deadpanned as he grabbed his best knife and cutting board. Quickly washing and drying the apple, he began to get to work, slicing the cheese and then the fruit into thin slices. 

“Can I help with anything?” Hermione asked.

Severus shook his head. “This won’t take long,” he explained, his knife flying through the food at breakneck speed, the result of decades of practice in his kitchen and by his cauldron. “But plates and cups are in that cupboard,” he said, indicating the place with the tip of his knife. “Help yourself from water from the fridge, if you want anything else I’ll get it in a minute.”

“Water’s fine,” Hermione assured him, retrieving dishware for each of them. Severus built two sandwiches before plopping them onto his panini press and setting the timer. He turned to catch Hermione, a lost look on her face as she stared at the refrigerator, an empty glass in her hand. She finally noticed him looking and flushed with embarrassment. “I wasn’t sure if you meant the door or inside…”

“The door is fine,” Severus assured her, taking the cup from her hand and pressing the correct button.

“I should have guessed, it’s just Mum and Dad had one like this and they never even used it and they never showed me how it worked, and I-”

“Relax,” Severus cut her off. “It’s always a challenging being in a new space, with technology you don’t use every day. No judgement.”

Hermione scrunched up her face. “I have to admit, it’s a little unsettling. Usually I’m the one in the room with the most firsthand Muggle knowledge.”

Severus grinned, grabbing a bag of potato crisps from the cabinet. “Believe me, it was quite the adjustment. But I managed.”

Hermione gestured around the room. “How did you get into all this?”

Checking their sandwiches and deciding they needed another minute, Severus turned back to face Hermione. “It was quite honestly by accident,” he began, crossing his arms over his chest, his hips leaning against the counter. “I quickly realized that once I was settled here that I couldn’t possibly get my hands on most potion ingredients. I could of course grow some of them, and I did plant an extensive herb garden. But too many of the ingredients I needed would have drawn too much attention to myself. 

Hermione frowned. “But you weren’t teaching anymore.”

“And?”

She hesitated. “Well, we were all under the impression you hated being stuck teaching the subject.”

“Oh, I did,” he admitted. The aroma of melting cheese and toasty bread alerted him that it was time. Quickly, he removed their food and plated each sandwich, slicing them neatly on the diagonal and heaping on a proportional helping of crisps before setting one in front of Hermione and taking his own place diagonally across from her. “But not because I hated the subject.”

“Oh?” Hermione looked more surprised than Severus thought she had a right to, and he wondered briefly if she was working him, trying to get him to open up. He found that he didn’t care. He wasn’t ashamed of anything he had to say, and he understood the situation well enough to trust that she didn’t have anything to gain by hearing it.

“I think you of all people would agree that I never should have been a teacher.” He nodded to the plate. “Go on, eat it before it gets cold.

“I don’t know about that,” Hermione hedged, taking a bite. Her eyes closed in involuntary ecstacy and she made a soft sound that made him blush a little. “Oh my goodness, how do you make that taste so good?”

“Magic,” he quipped with a grin as he took his own bite, chewing thoughtfully. “But look, I was dreadful. You know it, I know it, over a generation of students knows it.”

Hermione looked at him thoughtfully. “I’ll admit that your technique left something to be desired. But I think, under different circumstances, you could have been a wonderful teacher. You definitely had the brains for it.” Now he was most assuredly blushing. He tried to cover it up by taking a bite that was a bit too large so he had to focus on chewing instead of his racing pulse. 

“Some people just aren’t meant for that kind of work,” he persisted once he had managed to swallow.

“True,” Hermione admitted, popping a chip into her mouth. “But just in the little I’ve seen of you here, the way that people talk about you...you had the potential. You just hadn’t grown into it yet. I mean, I’m sure the fact that you weren’t teaching the subject that you really wanted, however-”

Severus snorted. “After all you know about me, you really still believe I wanted to teach Defence?”

Hermione frowned. “You didn’t?”

Severus shook his head. “Of course not. Dumbledore just started that rumor to bolster my cover. It’s much more understandable that I would betray the confidence of the man who kept me out of prison if I had an ongoing professional feud with him.”

“Huh. Interesting.”

Severus sighed deeply. “There were many things over the years that made me hate Albus Dumbledore. Denying me the Defense post was not one of them.” He shook his head. “No, potions had always been my refuge. It came easily to me, it was something I could get lost in. It’s hard to think about what you have lost, what you have done to destroy it, when your attention is the difference between success and catastrophic failure.”

“Makes sense,” Hermione said, starting on the second half of her sandwich.

“In any case, I had to find something else to occupy my time and distract me from my thoughts once I came here. I also needed to eat, so I learned quickly. My father didn’t think it right for a boy to learn to cook, and I’d eaten at the school most of my adult life, but I’d picked up enough during the summer holidays to get by. Then I saw they were looking for volunteers at the local soup kitchen, so I started and I learned so much. And saw how much need is out there. I still support them, we bring anything that doesn’t sell at the end of the day, and I contribute in other ways. I’ve even hired people I met through that program over the years, some are still on staff and some have gone on to bigger and better things.”

“That’s incredible.”

“I was hooked. I started trying new things here and of course I can only eat so much, so I started sharing them with some of the tentative friends I’d made since coming to town. Word got around and people kept asking me to cater small events or just offered to buy things off me, and a few people seriously pushed me to start a business. Then the space opened up and it all fell into place. The rest is history.”

“How did you pay for all that,” Hermione said, awed. “You’d already bought the house, yes?”

Severus nodded. “For those last few years Dumbledore paid me in Muggle money, which I invested in Muggle banks. I had enough in Gringotts to get by and he understood that there might be a time I might not be able to access those funds. I added to it by slowly taking money out of my account and changing it to Muggle money. Before the takeover, of course.”

“Naturally,” Hermione responded, nodding. “But didn’t the goblins think it odd that you had so little in your vault?”

Severus shrugged. “If they did, it wasn’t in their interest to say anything. Besides, I took care to always wear my fanciest robes when I went to give the impression I was spending my paychecks on frivolous things rather than putting it in the bank.”

Hermione grinned. “Clever.”

“By the time I arrived here, I was very comfortable. The years our world was in turmoil was very profitable for the Muggles. Luckily I invested most of it in this house and the cafe before the dot com bubble burst.” Hermione couldn’t hold back a giggle. Severus cast her a withering glare. “Yes?” 

“Sorry,” Hermione said, gasping a little as she caught her breath. “I still can’t get over the fact that you use phrases like ‘dot com bubble’.”

Smirking, Severus tried not to look smug. “I am a man of many mysteries.”

Something shifted in Hermione’s face as she smiled at him, giving him a look he could only describe as fond. It was unsettling and thrilling all at the same time. “That you most certainly are.”

* * *

Hours passed before either of them realized it, so engrossed were they in their conversation. Hermione marveled at the ease of it all. She had never really met anyone who could match her tit for tat on almost any topic. Their brains worked in very similar ways, which was thrilling in a way she couldn’t put into words. Long ago she had made peace with the fact that she approached the world differently than everyone in her life. It didn’t make her think any less of them, she just knew that she had to frame certain things certain ways to get her point across. Or just plow ahead and trust that Harry or Ron would get there eventually; they usually did. But to have things come out of her mouth and be instantly understood...it was like a craving long denied suddenly being fulfilled. And it felt glorious.

Yet no matter how much she was enjoying herself, as the sky turned to dusk Hermione realized just how hungry she had become. She looked at Severus regretfully. “I hate to cut this short, but I’m starving.”

“Oh,” he said, sounding disappointed, though quickly covering it. “I’d be happy to suggest a few places,” he added, his voice even.

“That would be lovely,” Hermione replied. “And maybe we could continue this while we eat?”

Severus visibly perked up, looking a bit flustered, and Hermione hid her grin. “Yes, of course.”

“So, where should we go? I don’t have any strong feelings, take me to your favorite spot.”

Severus grinned. “I know just the place.”

Twenty minutes later, they walked towards the tiny restaurant settled into a row of brick buildings, passing a most peculiar window display of an armadillo holding a bottle. “What’s the deal with that?” she asked, pointing to the dark storefront.

“No one really knows,” Severus replied. “It’s been there as long as anyone can remember, and no one has ever seen it open. Here we are,” he added, pulling open the glass door and gesturing her into the small space. The room was mostly counter and pizza ovens, with a few small tables clustered near the windows that looked out onto the campus buildings across the street. “Do you have a preference?”

“Whatever is good here.”

With a nod, Severus moved to the cash register to place their order, while Hermione claimed one of the empty tables. On the other side of the small room, near a case of beverages and ice cream, a towering stack of brown unused pizza boxes sat precariously, waiting to be filled. The whole place smelled like grease and melted cheese and it was heavenly. Severus joined her within a few minutes, his hands full of napkins and drinks for both of them. “What did you get?”

“The Special, garlic, eggplant, and basil. Simple but effective. And an order of curly fries to share, if you’d like. Er, chips. Sorry, I’ve been here too long.”

Hermione’s eyes shot up. “Chips and pizza?”

Severus shrugged. “Think of it like an appetizer. Besides, they are delicious.”

“Well, you are the expert,” Hermione replied, teasingly. “I have the ultimate faith in you.”

Severus, who looked suddenly self conscious, was saved the burden of answering by the man behind the counter, who was holding up a carton of fried potatoes in their general direction. One bite erased any doubt that Severus had made the right call. “You might have to order another round of these,” she informed him, licking the spices from her fingers in a most undignified fashion. It was glorious. 

“Let’s see how you are once we get the rest of our meal,” Severus replied, giving her a gloating grin that told her he knew what she was thinking, no Occlumency required.

“I really appreciate you taking time out like this,” Hermione told him earnestly. “And I’m really looking forward to our trip to Salem tomorrow.”

Severus smiled, though he looked a little uncomfortable. “As am I.” 

“It’s been so long since I’ve been able to go anywhere like a normal person. It’s really quite fun.”

Severus raised his eyebrows. “Is that all?”

Hermione grinned. “The company is particularly stellar as well.”

Smirking, Severus plucked one of the few remaining fries and popped it into his mouth. “I know what you mean, though. Being able to blend into a crowd for once. Well, as long as you don’t open your mouth.”

“Yes, the accent is a bit of a give away,” Hermione conceded. “I suppose I could try to hide it,” Hermione added, taking on the worst American accent she’d ever heard, causing both of them to laugh.

“I think it’s safest to stick with what you know.”

“Or can learn from a book,” she added, patting her bag with the book he’d loaned her. “I can’t wait to get started on this tonight.”

Severus smiled at her warmly. “I think you will find it...quite illuminating.” Their conversation halted when their pizza was delivered to the table. Hermione inhaled deeply, the spicy smell strong and mouthwatering. She waited for Severus to take his first piece before following suit, mimicking his style of eating it with his hands. Garlic exploded on her tongue as she enjoyed the saucy cheesy goodness. 

“This pizza is illuminating,” she finally managed after polishing off her fist slice without even setting it down on her paper plate. 

Severus grinned. “It might not be world famous like New York or New Haven, but it’s pretty damn good if you ask me. And much closer.”

“I think we might have to come back here again before I leave,” Hermione said before pausing, suddenly hesitant. “I mean, at least I will.”

Severus smiled at her encouragingly. “I would be happy to join you if you’d like my company,” he confirmed. “But I hope you might permit me to show you a few other of my favorites?”

Hermione returned his smile softly. “I’d like that. I’d really like that.” Without another word, Hermione turned back to her pizza, content to just be in this moment with her unexpected friend and delicious, delicious meal.


	4. Chapter 3 - Salem and Surprises

Severus was just deciding between pumpkin or blueberry muffins to take for a snack on the road when Hermione burst into the shop, clutching the book he’d leant her to her chest as if she couldn’t contain her excitement. Her hair was windswept and her eyes were alight with anticipation. For a moment, she took his breath away. She was just so full of life and the force of her beaming grin in his direction hit him square in the chest. It felt like something out of a fantasy.

Greeting her with a little wave of his hand, Severus shook himself internally. He had to get his head on straight. There was a reason it felt like a fantasy; that’s all it was. No matter how lovely it had been to talk for hours, to spend an extended time in someone else’s company and not have his skin crawl with an anxious desire to be alone, it didn’t mean anything. For Hermione, this week was a break from reality. When she left, he’d be right here. Something twisted in his stomach. For once, the idea of being alone terrified him.

“Oh, Severus, this was wonderful,” Hermione gushed as she rushed over to him, shaking the book a little to emphasize her point. Now that she was closer, he could see the bags under her eyes, a tiredness she was clearly trying to fight. Unless that was a perpetual side effect from her line of work. 

Severus raised an eyebrow. “Did you even sleep at all last night?”

Hermione winced, looking a little guilty. “Not much,” she admitted. “But honestly, I don’t even care. It’s been far too long since I’ve finished a book in one night. It was fantastic!”

Their eyes met, and Severus knew that look well. He felt such a kinship in that moment it was a bit overwhelming. He’d never met anyone else who could get just as excited as him about something like a good book. Or at least, anyone who would admit to it and give him the time of day. 

“If you’re not up for our trip…” Severus began, but Hermione, looking horrified, cut him off.

“Absolutely not!” she insisted. “I only stayed up to finish because I wanted to be prepared for today. I could be called back at any time if an emergency happens, I’m not risking missing out on this when everything is so fresh.”

“Well then,” Severus said slowly. “You need some coffee.”

* * *

Hermione gratefully accepted the steaming mug that Severus handed to her before he sat down opposite her. She sniffed the surface cautiously, and was a little surprised at the spicy aroma. “What’s in this?” she asked, curious. 

“It’s called a pumpkin spice latte. They’re all the rage.”

Blowing on the surface first, Hermione took a tentative sip. “Severus, that’s delicious.”

His mouth twitched up into the slightest of smiles, looking pleased. “I wish I could claim credit for it. Though I’ve heard that mine are better than the original.”

“It’s very good,” Hermione agreed. “Though I don’t have anything to compare it to.”

“The secret ingredient is pumpkin juice. Most everywhere else just uses spices. It shouldn’t work but it somehow does.”

Hermione looked at him curiously. “You risk getting pumpkin juice? I’d imagine you’d need quite a lot, wouldn’t that draw attention?”

“It would,” Severus conceded. “But I wear this when I need to go on a buying trip.” He pulled out a simple pendant from under his turtleneck, today a rich wine color. 

“What is it?” Hermione asked, leaning over to get a closer look. 

“It’s the deflector charm I told you about. It makes me less than memorable to people I don’t want seeing me. Or at least remembering me.”

Hermione groaned. “Sounds like another wonderful item on the black market.”

Severus snorted. “Hardly. I developed this myself, and I assure you I am not attempting to become the next great crime lord. Not that it would be possible, the charm has to be carefully tailored to the wearer, it’s too complex to be mass produced.”

“I’ll take your word on that,” Hermione said skeptically as he tucked the charm back under his clothes. “Wait, were you wearing that the day I came in here?”

Pink splotches rose on Severus’ face. “Yes.”

“It didn’t work on me.”

Severus shook his head. “No, it did. You didn’t register that it was me until you got to the register.”

“But when I did, I knew. There wasn’t any magic going on there.”

Severus nodded once. “Correct.”

“How is that possible?”

Severus’ mouth twitched towards a smile again. “Because I realized that I didn’t mind being found. That of all the people who could have walked through that door, you were one of the more agreeable options.”

Hermione made a face. “Agreeable. What every girl dreams of.”

Severus winced. “My apologies, that came out wrong…”

Hermione shook her head. “I was teasing.”

“Oh.”

They finished their coffee and pumpkin bread quickly, both eager to get on their way. 

“So,” Severus said as they were putting on their coats. “Have you rented a car? If not, we can use mine.”

Hermione froze, startled. “Severus, no. I mean...I thought we’d get there the usual way?”

Severus stared at her for a moment, his mouth dropping open. “Oh,” he muttered, “I didn’t realize.”

“I know it’s not that far, but it’s not exactly close. I thought it would mean more time actually exploring, you know?”

“Of course,” Severus said tightly. 

“What’s wrong.”

Severus shut his eyes for a moment, looking like he wished he could disappear into the floor. “I, er, haven’t done that in twenty years.”

Hermione’s eyes widened. “Oh,” she said, not knowing what else would be helpful at this moment. 

“When you’re trying to live a Muggle life,” he added quietly. “One tends to adopt their customs.”

“Naturally,” Hermione replied, feeling embarrassed. “Oh Severus, I didn’t think. I’m so sorry.”

Severus waved off her apology. “Why would you have given it a second thought? It’s fine, really.”

“We can take your car if you can drive, I do have a license but I’m not sure if it’s valid here. And I’ve never driven on the wrong side of the road before.”

“No,” Severus insisted firmly. “You’re correct. We’d lose a lot of time on the road, we should make the most of it.” His tone told her that his mind was made up and there was no use trying to talk him out of it.

“Very well,” she conceded. “But you’re doing Side-Along. I’m not about to have you go splinching yourself on me from lack of practice.”

* * *

Severus felt incredibly foolish, standing in the alley behind the cafe next to the dumpster and compost bins. One of the resident squirrells was taking advantage of the easy meal opportunity, a half eaten bagel dangling from his mouth. Logically he knew that this location made sense; they couldn’t Apparate inside because the noise would draw too much attention. And it wasn’t as if the concept of sneaking around and being discrete around Muggles was a new concept for him. But it had been so long since he had done this particular thing that he couldn’t feel confident about its execution. Not that he thought that Hermione would falter.

Turning to Hermione and shifting uncomfortably, Severus asked, “So, how should we do this?”

Giving him a reassuring smile, Hermione reached out and clasped his left hand firmly in her right. “I’ve got this,” she said softly, giving him a little squeeze. Her hands were shockingly smooth against his hands, which were calloused first from potion making and now from cooking. Severus felt a tingle of something that had nothing to do with anxiety, but before he could name it, Hermione was turning, pulling him into the suffocating darkness.

At first, he thought that was the worst of it. He had forgotten how much he hated the feeling of being stuck in a tube. Had forgotten how he’d trained himself not to care. It was all he could do to focus on Hermione’s hand, to make sure his grip was firm. But then, as solid ground formed once more against his feet, his head still felt stuck in the vice like grip. He stumbled, reeling, unable to tell what was up and what was down.

“Severus!” he vaguely heard Hermione’s worried cry, but it was like he was hearing her words through cotton in his ears. His legs gave out from under him, but before he landed on what he could now conclude was the ground, an arm was wrapped firmly under his shoulders, hoisting him up. “Come on,” Hermione’s voice said again, closer, much closer this time. “There’s a bench a few steps this way. Can you try to walk?”

Reluctantly, Severus put a foot out and took a shaky step. His senses were starting to fade back into existence, though he still felt dizzy and a little nauseous. They reached the bench sooner than he expected and sank onto it in relief, doubling over to hold his throbbing head.

“I’m so sorry…” Hermione whispered, sounding close to tears. Her hand traced soothing circles on his back in what seemed to be a reflex.

“I’m...fine…” Severus croaked, realizing as he spoke that he didn’t believe it either. 

“No you’re not,” Hermione sighed. 

“True,” Severus conceded. “But I will be. It just takes some time to acclimate, that’s all.” 

Hermione groaned. “I should have thought of this. If you haven’t Apparated in two decades, you are doing it with all brand new cells. So of course it’s going to be as extreme as when you first learned, only amplified because, well…”

Severus couldn’t help but snort, relieved when it didn’t make him feel any worse. “I’m old?” He chanced a look at Hermione, who looked like she was holding back her amusement.

“Our bodies react to everything differently as we age. It’s easier if you can slowly acclimate over time.”

“Well then,” Severus said, gingerly sitting upright. “Let’s hope my body responds better on the return trip.”

Hermione looked alarmed. “Oh no, we’ll take public transit back. I’m not risking another episode like this.”

Severus waved off her concern. “It’s already beginning to pass. Shall we begin?”

Hermione gave him a scrutinizing look. “Are you sure you’re up to it?”

Giving her a wan smile, Severus made his way to his feet. “Aside from appearances to the contrary, I do have quite a bit of life ahead of me.”

“Please don’t be offended,” Hermione rushed, looking anxious as she stood next to him. 

“I’m not,” he assured her. “Your concern is touching. Though frankly misplaced; I’m in far less danger from bodily harm these days.” Hermione sniffed, as if she didn’t quite believe him. “Now, shall we?”

He had barely taken a step when he lost his footing, not quite falling, but stumbling enough to be noticable. Hermione was at his side in an instant, steadying him and linking his arm through hers. “I’ve got you,” she whispered reassuringly. “And don’t be all proud and power through. We can take as many breaks as you need. I won’t think any less of you.”

Nodding his silent agreement, Severus let her lead him down the street, feeling a strong sense of comfort in their proximity.

* * *

Despite Severus’ literal stumble at the start of their trip, they managed to pack in quite a bit of sightseeing. They didn’t spend long in the magical parts of town; Severus seemed on edge even if he didn’t admit it to her, and she didn’t want to prolong his suffering. There was plenty to explore in the Muggle parts of town, however, and she truly enjoyed seeing how they interpreted the local history. Thankfully, as Severus predicted, the return trip had been much smoother, though this time she had insisted that he sit for a whole five minutes before they moved on.

Hermione sighed contentedly, leaning into Severus just a little as they paused in their walk around the pond on the nearby college campus, the late afternoon sun glimmering in blinding glory. She couldn’t remember a day she had enjoyed so much, where she could just be in the moment and not worry about the million things that it was her job to worry about. And it had been even longer since she had felt this instantly comfortable with anyone once they decided on friendship. It had happened when she was eleven with Harry and Ron and a few more times over the years as her circle grew marginally wider. But ever since her public life began, she couldn’t trust anyone enough to let them in without being properly vetted. It was beyond amazing to feel something like normal.

Turning her head to try and put this all into words for Severus, she realized that he was looking at her with as much familiarity as she felt. He gave her the smallest self conscious smile when he caught her looking, but didn’t pull away. 

“This has been a lovely day,” she said quietly, not wanting to break the spell of the moment.

Severus snorted softly, almost affectionately. “Says the one whose head wasn’t spinning the whole time.”

“I don’t know,” Hermioned said before she could think better of it. “It kind of felt like it was. In the best possible way.” She bit her lip, wondering if she had been too forward. It was the truth, though. Everything she thought she knew had been turned on its head, replaced by a reality she desperately wanted to know more about. 

Severus stared deeply into her eyes, and if she hadn’t learned diligently the warning signs, she’d have thought that he was using Legilimency on her. He seemed to be wrestling with something; she wondered if it was the same push pull raging inside her chest. Everything in her was screaming to move closer, to succumb to the urge to kiss him that had pestered her all day. The more they talked the more they felt like kindred spirits. She loved her friends, and Ron in particular, dearly. But she had never before found anyone before who would be able to engage in an hour long conversation about some minutia and enjoy it. It was exhilarating.

And yet the reality of their situation kept rearing its ugly head. She was here for a few days, nothing more. Was it really fair to drop in on his life like this and do something just to make her feel good about herself? And did he really, as it seemed this whole time, view her as his equal, or was she perpetually going to be a child in his eyes? Logically, the best course of action would be to do nothing. 

However, in her experience, logic rarely won out when feelings were concerned. 

Severus moved slowly, infinitesimally closer. She returned the gesture. Hesitation flashed across his face and Hermione couldn’t help but give him a reassuring smile. Taking it as the permission it was intended to be, Severus leaned forward, Hermione meeting him halfway. His lips were warm and surprisingly soft, and his every movement was gentle, as if afraid she would break. Feeling emboldened, Hermione responded with a determined furiosity, needing him to know that she didn’t have any regrets, that he didn’t have to hold back with her.

Almost instantly, she regretted it, as Severus broke the kiss abruptly, pulling back and extricating their arms. Eyes closed, he rubbed at his forehead frantically. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have...crossed a line…”

“Hey,” Hermione said soothingly, reaching out to still his hand and move it away from his face. “You didn’t. It was mutual, I promise.”

To her surprise, her words didn’t seem to calm him; in fact, if anything he seemed more agitated, shaken even. His response was so disproportionate to what happened that Hermione knew that it had to be about something more than her. Still, she couldn’t help but feel the rejection, couldn’t help but feel foolish for allowing her brain to concoct a fantasy that never could be. “I’m sorry,” he replied weakly, not looking at her. “I need...to get back to the cafe.”

“Okay,” Hermione said quietly, feeling small among the towering trees. 

“Can we talk tomorrow?” he asked, sounding desperate as he hesitantly looked into her eyes again.

“Of course,” Hermione replied, relieved that this disaster wasn’t the end of everything. “I’ll come around for breakfast again.

Nodding once, Severus turned and walked so fast that he was practically running up the steep grassy hill. With a sigh, Hermione trudged up after him to return to her room. After the adventures of the day, she could do with a nice hot shower and some time alone with her thoughts.

* * *

He had blown it.

Severus thought he had known what he was doing, what he wanted. He thought that he was getting signals that Hermione was on the same page. He’d just gotten physical confirmation that it was true. But panic had prevailed and as he approached the cafe and the adrenaline wore off he was weighed down with an overwhelming feeling of embarrassment. He was a fool to ever think that he could attempt anything of a normal life. These past two decades had been an illusion, a nice change of pace but under it all he was still fundamentally broken.

He didn’t really want to go to the cafe, didn’t want to have to deal with people. But he did need to talk to someone, and the only person he could possibly share any of this with was at the cafe.

With shaking hands, he pushed open the familiar door, stumbling inside. He had barely taken two steps inside when a whirl of purple nearly knocked him over, wrapping her little arms around his legs. “Rus!” Emma shouted excitedly as she hugged him tightly.

The sight of his goddaughter momentarily shook him out of his anxiety spiral. “Well, if it isn’t my favorite goddaughter,” he greeted, ruffling her hair. She scowled up at him, but the effect was dampened a bit by the gigantic grin she was obviously fighting back.

“Em, what have we told you about inside feet,” Ace said, rushing over hurriedly wiping her hands on her apron. “Sorry about that, Severus,” she added apologetically as she pried her daughter away. 

“This is a nice surprise,” Severus said, looking around to see how busy it was. It looked about typical volume for that time of day.

“Olivia called out sick,” Ace explained, taking a seat and pulling Emma up on her knee, bouncing her absently, eliciting giggles of glee from the little girl. “It was swamped in here before.”

“You could have called me in,” Severus insisted. “We were shorthanded because-”

“You took a much deserved day off,” Ace finished for him firmly, frowning. “Which begs the question, what are you doing here?”

“Is Penny still here?” Severus asked, his momentary reprieve quickly failing. 

“Yeah, she’s in the back,” Ace replied. “You know you don’t have to check up on her.”

Severus gave her an annoyed look, but it didn’t have any heat in it. “I know perfectly well that she’s more capable of running this place than I am. That’s not what this is.”

“Is everything alright?”

Severus sighed heavily. “It will be. If you’ll excuse me…” With a wave to Emma, who looked confused why he couldn’t stay longer, Severus slipped behind the counter and into the back. Penny was in the office in the middle of a sea of receipts and ledgers. Severus knocked on the open door, causing her to jump a little at the sudden noise. “I didn’t mean to startle you,” Severus apologized, hovering on the threshold even though technically this was his office.

“It’s fine,” Penny replied, scrutinizing him closely. “What’s wrong.”

“Why do you think-”

“We’ve known each other for fifteen years. I’ve never seen you look as flustered as you do right now.” She pointed to the chair on the other side of his desk. “Sit.” Closing the door behind him, Severus obeyed. The instant he sat he cradled his head in his hands, the scene by the lake playing over and over in his mind. “What’s going on?”

“I kissed her,” he said, his voice muffled by his hands.”

“And she rebuffed you?” Penny’s concerned voice prodded, sounding sympathetic. 

Sitting up, Severus shook his head miserably. “She kissed me back.”

Penny frowned. “And you’re sitting her scaring the shit out of me because…”

“I freaked out and ran off. Literally ran. I got a stitch in my side I went so fast.”

Penny snorted, and instinctively Severus glared at her. “Oh Sev,” she replied, smiling at him fondly. “What will we ever do with you?”

Severus shook his head miserably. “I’m just not good at this kind of thing.”

“Nonsense,” Penny said firmly. “You’re just out of practice. I’ve known you forever and I’ve never seen you like this.”

“A mess?”

“Crushing so hard you can’t think straight,” Penny corrected, pointing a pen at him to emphasize her point.

“This hasn’t happened in years,” Severus admitted in a whisper. This was the closest he’d ever talked about Before. “And that ended up being one sided.”

Penny held his gaze, the fierce fire in her eyes reminding him of how she was when they first met, so used to fighting to get what she wanted. “I know you don’t like to talk about your past. But if you ever want to, you know you can trust me, right?”

Severus exhaled loudly. “It’s not a matter of trust, Penny,” he explained. “There are things that sometimes I wish I could forget.”  _ And you might hate me. And I can’t bear to lose you. Or worse, see disappointment in your eyes when you look at me. _

“Believe me, I understand,” Penny said, and of course, Severus knew she did. Not the same things that haunted him, but she had her own ghosts. “But she knows those things, doesn’t she.”

Severus nodded. “More than most who knew me back then.”

Penny shrugged. “Then it makes sense, doesn’t it? You don’t have to have any walls up with her. It’s hard to let yourself have feelings when you’re worried about what you might let slip.”

“I just thought…” Severus searched for the words. “You know how little I’ve dated, how disastrous that’s always been. I thought that something was wrong with me. That I was broken.”

Penny narrowed her eyes. “Hey, you’re not broken. You’re probably just demi.”

“What now?”

“Demisexual. You only are attracted to people you feel an emotional connection to.”

“I never said…” he muttered, flustered. Though she did have the point. Part of his attraction to Lily had been her friendship, how she saw himself better than even he could.

Penny grinned wickedly. “You’re really easy to read when someone has known you as long as I have, Sev.”

Severus scoffed. “There was a time that would not have been the case.”

Penny reached across the table to take his hands in her own. “Then I’m glad that I got to know you as you are now. Secrets or not. Now,” she said, pulling back and becoming businesslike. “How are you going to fix this?”

Severus shrugged. “She said she’d come by for breakfast again.”

Penny’s face lit up. “Good, then she still wants to talk to you. You want my advice?”

Severus gave her a deadpan look. “I came here, didn’t I?”

“Go find her. Not in a creepy stalker way, just check in and tell her what you told me. And what you couldn’t tell me without blowing your cover.” Severus froze and Penny’s eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Oh shit, are you a spy? You’re not going to kill me, are you?” She only half sounded like she was joking. 

“Don’t be silly,” Severus said, forcing himself to stand. “We’ve known each other far too long for that.”

Leaving her to figure out what he meant, and resolving to tell her everything once he sorted things out with Hermione, he departed, ducking out the back door to avoid being detained by the adorable little girl in the cafe.


	5. Chapter 4 - Kindred Spirits

Hermione sighed heavily as she towelled off her hair, returning to the cozy room that was hers for the week. Her head was still spinning even after her shower. It had been such a glorious day and the way it had ended was just so...abrupt. She was both worried about Severus and angry at herself for overstepping, for crossing a line she didn’t realize was there. She should have known, she shouldn’t have projected what she was feeling onto him. It had to just be a matter of proximity, the first man she could allow herself to be interested in now that she wasn’t pretending to be happily married. Nothing else was logical.

She had just stepped into her nightclothes, resigned to a night in with her books and some take out when a soft knock came from her door. “Who is it?” she called out, feeling panicked. What if it was him, she couldn’t let him see here like this. Not after that disaster of a kiss. 

“It’s Carol, dear. Are you decent?”

“Come in,” Hermione called out, slipping on her dressing gown and hurrying to the door.

The older woman bit her lip nervously, taking in her state of attire. “I’m sorry to bother you like this, but Severus is downstairs. He wasn’t sure if you’d like to see him, but it seemed like he had something he’d like to discuss.”

Hermione sighed with relief. “We had a little misunderstanding earlier,” she explained, grateful that he hadn’t barged up, had given her the option to say no. “Of course I’ll see him, just give me five minutes to get changed?”

“Certainly,” Carol said with obvious relief. “Should I send him up, or…”

“That’s perfect, thanks.”

Carol narrowed her eyes in what Hermione hoped was a teasing way. “No funny business now.”

Hermione grinned. “Wouldn’t dream of it.”

“And don’t worry about Severus, I know he’s a bit gruff on the outside but he’s got a good heart.”

“I know,” Hermione replied softly.

“Doesn’t want anyone to know it, but everyone around here does,” Carol added conspiratorially.

“Don’t worry, I won’t spill the beans,” Hermione replied with a wink, which made Carol grin before excusing herself. Hermione dressed quickly, trying desperately to do something with her hair to make it somewhat presentable. She had just wrestled it into a ponytail when another knock came on her door, the sound this time a hint lower. “Coming!” she called out, heart pounding. She pulled the door open just a little too quickly, and Severus, startled, jumped back just a bit. 

Once he recovered, he smiled at her sheepishly. “Would you mind terribly if I come in?”

“Not at all,” Hermione insisted. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until tomorrow.”

“I know,” he said. “But I just...I needed to explain what happened.”

Hermione shook her head. “There’s no need. I misread the situation, I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable.”

Looking startled, Severus waved his hands frantically. “No, that’s not what happened. I mean, yes, I did get uncomfortable. But only because it scared me.”

Hermione frowned, looking skeptical. “Scared you?”

He gestured absently around the room. “I’ve never done this, Hermione,” he exclaimed, sounding frustrated. “You know more than anyone that I’ve had anything but a normal life. These past years here have been a fluke, the closest I’d ever thought I’d get to it. But despite everything, I never felt compelled to kiss somebody until today, let alone act on it.”

_ Oh. _ “Ever?”

Severus shrugged uncomfortably. “Not since I was a teenager. Then after that it was too dangerous to get involved with anybody, so I chose not to open myself up to that possibility. But even once I came here, I tried, I really did. I went out with some lovely women. Even a few men, just in case. But I never could see them as anything more than a potential friend, if that. Most of them were failed first dates, with a few second dates I went on because I couldn’t figure out where I stood.” He exhaled forcefully, sagging a little, looking defeated. “I thought I just wasn’t capable of making a connection like that. That I’d broken something during those years, or perhaps I’d always been broken…”

Unable to restrain herself, Hermione crossed the room and took his hands. “Severus, no.”

“I know,” he admitted, looking at their entwined hands, holding very still. “Penny thinks that I need an emotional connection before I can figure out the rest,” he said quietly. “Like I told you before. No matter how settled I’ve felt here, I’ve never told anyone about my past.”

Hermione couldn’t help but grin slyly. “And I know where all the bodies are buried, so to speak.” Severus winced. “Sorry, poor choice of words.”

He smiled wanly, glancing up at her, displaying a vulnerability that Hermione never would have expected to see. “That is the general idea, though, yes.”

“Well then,” Hermione said, stepping a little closer. “That might explain things.”

“Pardon?” Severus asked, his breath hitching and his voice pitching slightly higher than usual. 

“For starters, I was in fact reading the situation correctly,” she replied, grinning. “For a moment I thought I was just seeing what I wanted to see.”

“You wanted to see that?” he asked, sounding shocked. 

“I wasn’t expecting to. But once the idea came to mind…” She looked him deep in the eyes. “How would you like a do over?”

Severus frowned slightly. “What?”

“A do over. Of our first kiss.”

“Is that allowed?”

Hermione shrugged. “The only rule here is that we are both willing and able.”

“Well then,” Severus replied, leaning slightly closer. “Carry on.”

Hermione closed the gap between them, bringing her hand to his cheek. She guided Severus’ face down, but instead of going straight for his mouth she brought their foreheads together, pausing for a moment to acclimate them to the new proximity. Severus’ black eyes looked so different this close, swirling patterns of various shades of dark brown with a few flecks of gold. “Are you sure,” she asked, unable to hold back her smile. She felt suddenly nervous, like this was too good to be true and she would wake up at any moment to the crushing disappointment of reality.

Severus didn’t reply. Instead, he tilted his head down and a little to the side, carefully pressing their lips together. Hermione wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer. She wouldn’t push this time, she would let him set the pace. No matter how much she wanted to run with this, to walk him back towards the bed for whatever might happen after. The force of her feelings surprised her; perhaps it was because they were so fresh, so new, so unexpected. 

Though he broke the chaste kiss far too soon, Severus didn’t pull away. He looked a delightful combination of sheepish and thrilled and it made something in Hermione’s chest swoop with glee, knowing that she might be the only person to have ever seen this side of him. “I, er, might need a little direction,” he said softly, embarrassed. “This is something you can only learn so much about out of books.”

Hermione giggled, though she regretted it the moment she saw his face shift, starting to close off. “Hey, no,” she whispered, taking his face in both of her hands. “I just...I’ve been there, okay? I had the same thought my first time kissing someone.”

“Oh,” Severus replied, relaxing under her fingers. “Right.”

“I think this is my favorite part of all of this,” Hermione told him quietly, tracing his jawline with her index finger. “Learning just how much of a book nerd you are.” She kissed him softly on the lips. “It’s nice to meet a kindred spirit.” She considered making a “I’m the teacher now” joke, but thought better of it. Severus was already so much on edge, she didn’t want to risk him overthinking now. There was nothing ethically wrong with what they were doing, after all; they were both consenting adults. She settled on a practical demonstration, returning to his lips, gently tracing her tongue across his bottom lip. He gasped in surprise and Hermione took advantage of the moment, deepening the kiss. Severus’ movements were jerky, clumsy at first, but he quickly got the hang of it and she could stop thinking about the logistics and just enjoy the moment. 

It was with a great deal of reluctance that they both broke apart, gasping for air but staying impossibly close. “So,” Severus finally asked in a raspy voice. “Was I any good?” Though his tone was casual, there was a real hint of anxiety under his question.

Hermione pressed a quick kiss to the tip of his nose. “You’re a quick study.”

Severus’ mouth quirked with quiet amusement. “I do have a phenomenal teacher.” Snorting in response, Hermione kissed him again, grinning against his face. She was just beginning to feel like this moment couldn’t be more perfect when the William Tell overture blared through the otherwise quiet room. Hermione groaned, pulling away reluctantly. Severus made a small involuntary sound of protest as she fumbled for her phone.

“I ordered takeout before you got here,” Hermione explained, finally finding the obnoxious little box. Honestly, how did Muggles stand these things? “Yes, I’ll be right down,” she answered, grabbing for her purse. Severus grabbed her hand.

“This one’s on me,” he said, starting to the door. 

“Oh no you don’t,” Hermione warned, blocking his path. “If this,” she gestured absently to the room around them. “Is going anywhere, you have to let me pay for my own meals at least sometimes. I will not be a kept woman.”

Severus bit back a smile, but his eyes danced in amusement. “I wouldn’t dream of it. Very well. What’s on the menu tonight?”

“Chinese. I couldn’t make up my mind and ordered about five different things. There should be plenty of you’d like to join me?”

“I’d be delighted.”

* * *

Severus couldn’t remember if he had ever felt this content. He was warm under a hand crocheted blanket that had come with the room, a garish color combination but nice and warm. He was stuffed full of delicious food; they had talked so long that their first helping had long ago worn off and they somehow managed to finish everything Hermione ordered. And they had talked. That was probably his favorite part. That Hermione was brilliant was not new, but seeing her like this was. And getting to engage in philosophical conversation on topics he hadn’t allowed himself to think about in years was thrilling. He wished they could stay here, huddled up in this room on this surprisingly comfortable bed forever. He wished that this could be their reality.

Before thoughts of their real lives could entirely intrude upon their bubble, Hermione was kissing him again, slowly and determinedly. She tasted like soy sauce and garlic and it should have been disgusting but it made him want it all the more. He didn’t want to brag, and of course he had nothing else to compare this to, but by his estimation he had gotten quite good at this kissing thing. Hermione certainly didn’t seem to be complaining. 

Hermione eventually pulled back, though she kept their heads close. “Hi,” she said with a tender smile. 

“Hello,” Severus sighed, words seeming like an insurmountable struggle at the moment. 

“How are you feeling?” she asked, looking a little worried. “This isn’t too much?”

“It’s perfect,” Severus told her truthfully, brushing a lock of her hair behind her ear. 

“Isn’t it though?” she replied, shifting down to snuggle into his side. “Who would have thought, huh?”

“Certainly not I,” Severus admitted, pulling her close. “A most pleasant surprise.”

“You know what the weirdest thing about this is?” Hermione asked, turning a little so she could crook her head up to look at him. 

Severus’ mind swirled. There were at least five strange and bizarre things about the events of the past 48 hours; he had absolutely no idea what she was alluding to. “What’s that?”

Hermione reached up to touch his cheek, causing his heart to leap in his chest. “How easy this all is. There are so many reasons why this should be weird and it isn’t.”

Severus turned his head to press a kiss into the palm of her hand. “I know what you mean.”

Wrapping her arm around him, Hermione gave him a big hug. “Who knew we’d have so much in common?”

Severus couldn’t help but grin. “I mean, afterall, we are probably the only two people on the planet who have read  _ Hogwarts, A History _ cover to cover multiple times.”

“Clearly destiny,” Hermione pronounced and Severus couldn’t help but chuckle. His face hurt. Partially from the kissing, but mainly from all the smiling he’d been doing lately. Sure he was a bit less guarded these days, but even by the standards of his new life, it was excessive.

“Clearly.”

Hermione sighed heavily. “It’s been a long time since I’ve done anything like this. Started anything new. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t because of the arrangement…” She shook her head. “But the fact of the matter is that I hadn’t wanted to.” She pressed a quick kiss to his lips again. “I think you were right earlier. It helps knowing everything up front.”

Severus frowned. “Not everything, I hope.”

“Everything that matters,” Hermione amended. “I know that I can trust you.”

Severus suddenly felt nervous. “And how do you know that?”

Hermione shrugged, her shoulder digging into him a little. “You managed to keep your true intentions secret from Voldemort and pretty much everyone else for decades. I think you can restrain yourself from going to the press. A luxury for someone in my position.”

“True.”

“And, in order to do so, you’d have to give up your location, so you have much more to gain by keeping quiet.”

Severus snorted. “There’s the politician.”

Hermione grinned sheepishly. “Professional hazzard.”

“It’s a fair assessment, though. But you don’t have to worry. After that outrageous tell-all that Skeeter woman wrote about me, I’m not inclined to do her kind any favors. Besides,” he added softly, running a hand through Hermione’s hair, his fingers tangling on the curls. “I’ve done the whole ‘betray a friend’ thing and that pretty much ruined the next two decades of my life and forced me to go into exile. I’m not looking for a repeat performance.”

“Good,” Hermione sighed, snuggling into his shoulder. They lay in a comfortable silence for a few moments before Hermione asked, “Severus?”

“Yes?”

“What are we doing?”

Severus frowned. “I think the kids these days call it cuddling.”

“Oh ha-ha,” Hermione replied dryly. Severus could almost hear the eyeroll in her voice. “You know what I mean.”

Severus sighed heavily. “Yes, I do.” 

“I keep forgetting for a moment that I have a life to get back to. The kids, my job…”

“Nice to know that I’ve progressed enough in my kissing ability to induce temporary amnesia,” Severus said evenly, gratified by the little huff of air Hermione let out in reply. 

“I feel like I’m taking advantage of you,” Hermione said quietly.

“What? No…” Severus insisted, sitting up a little. “Please, don’t think that for a minute.”

“You deserve better than to be my rebound guy,” Hermione explained hesitantly.

Severus arched an eyebrow. “Is that what you think this is?”

Hermione groaned, rolling onto her back and covering her eyes with her hands. “I don’t know.”

“What if I told you that I didn’t care?” Severus asked, feeling reckless. He wasn’t about to let her overthink her way out of the best thing that had happened to him in ages.

“Severus…”

“Listen to me,” he replied firmly, taking her hand. “I don’t care if all we have is the rest of this week. I’ve never felt anything like this before and if you haven’t noticed, I’m not as young as I once was.” Hermione snorted. “I might never get an opportunity like this again. I’d rather have a few incredible days than to wonder what could have happened if we stopped thinking so hard.”

Hermione winced. “We do have a tendency to do that, don’t we?”

“We do,” Severus confirmed. “If being your rebound means I get a glimpse into a normal life for a short time...it’s worth it.”

Hermione looked at him seriously. “You think we’ll be able to go our separate ways at the end of the week? Just like that?”

“You have your life, and I have mine. We’re both fairly settled in them, and I don’t see that changing any time soon. What’s the harm as long as we both know what we’re getting ourselves into?”

“When you put it that way…” Hermione leaned up, pressing a tender kiss to his lips before making a face. “We really should brush our teeth.”

Severus suddenly felt self conscious. “It’s late, I should probably be going...let you sleep.”

Hermione looked up at him hesitantly. “Or...you could stay?”

Severus gulped nervously. “Stay?”

“Nothing has to happen,” she assured him quickly, as if reading his mind. “Kissing is enough progress for one night. It’s just that if we only have a few days...I’d kind of like to make the most of it.”

With a fortifying inhale, Severus nodded. “Then it’s decided. I’ll stay.”

* * *

The next morning, Severus was severely regretting his lack of foresight. Not that he ever would have thought he’d be spending the night, but a change of clothes would have been really great right about now. He’d thought about swinging by his place before they went out for breakfast, but his growling stomach, and the answering calls of Hermione’s, argued otherwise. He just prayed that his limited wardrobe of turtlenecks in one of four colors wouldn’t make it glaringly obvious that he was wearing the same thing as the day before.

Unfortunately for him, Penny was far too observant for her own good. She looked back and forth between them, looking far too excited and rather smug all at the same time. “Something happened,” she said, a statement not a question. 

Severus gave her what he hoped was an innocent look. “I haven’t the foggiest idea of what you are talking about,” he replied, his voice even.

Smirking, Penny walked down the counter, grabbing his favorites without being asked. Hermione raised an eyebrow. “What, are you ashamed to be seen with me?” she asked, the teasing look in her eye cutting through the seriousness of her words.

“Of course not,” Severus replied with a huff. “I just think people are entitled to some privacy.”

Hermione frowned. “She’s your friend, though. It’s different.”

Severus sighed. “I’m still not used to that. Having friends.”

Hermione grinned. “Better get used to it,” she said, fiddling with his scarf. “Because you’re stuck with us.” Before he could respond, Hermione stood on her toes and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.

“I knew it!” Penny shouted gleefully. Out of the corner of his eye, Severus saw her pump her fist into the air in her excitement. Severus leaned into the kiss, raising his right hand to flip Penny off. She snorted and Hermione pulled back, smiling sheepishly. 

“Sorry about that,” Hermione said, blushing. 

Penny shook her head, grinning. “No apologies necessary. It’s about time this one got a life.”

“We’ll take the food to go,” Severus told Penny pointedly.

Penny wiggled her eyebrows. “Ooh, dirty.”

Severus rolled his eyes. “Unless you want to find a new job, enough with the commentary.”

“Severus!” Hermione exclaimed, sounding concerned.

“Relax,” Penny assured her. “He’s just blowing smoke. He’d be lost without me and he knows it.” She bit her lip, eyes twinkling with suppressed mirth. 

It was true, but Severus wouldn’t give her the satisfaction of admitting it, not when she was so purposefully being a pain. “If you would kindly get your mind out of gutter and give us our food, we will get out of your hair.”

“Fine,” Penny sighed dramatically, stuffing everything into a brown paper bag. She handed it to Severus, but didn’t let go right away. “I really am happy for you, you know,” she assured him softly, her voice sincere and her words meant only for him. 

“I do,” Severus admitted with a slight bow. With that, he gestured to the door, leading Hermione out into the day ahead of them.

* * *

Severus felt his heart skip a beat as Hermione beamed up at him. “This has been the most perfect day I’ve had in a long time,” she sighed, taking his hands. “I wish it didn’t have to end.”

If he were a suaver man with more experience in these matters, he’d have said something along the lines of “who says it has to?” Instead, however, all he could manage was a weak smile and a small, “Yeah.”

“This might sound crazy,” Hermione continued. “But I really enjoyed waking up with you this morning. Any chance you might be interested in a repeat?”

Nervous excitement coursed through his body before his mind could catch up with disqualifying logic. “Are you sure?” he asked, finally. “I’d hate to cut into your precious reading time.”

Hermione squeezed his hand, looking him right in the eye. “I have books at home, even if I don’t make the time to read them. You on the other hand…” She looked him up and down. “Priorities.”

Nodding, Severus let her lead him through the blessedly empty entryway of the bed and breakfast and to her room. At first, he expected them to continue as they had most of the day, talking for hours about nothing and everything. But it was quickly apparent that Hermione had other things in mind. For a brief moment panic flooded Severus’ chest. He knew that he should stop her, but he would be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy the fierce way she kissed him, as if her life depended on it.

His body was betraying his mind, heat flooding his senses as he pulled her closer, closer. He wanted to stay in this limbo, with her hands on his face, his arms, his chest. He didn’t want to think, only to be a bundle of nerve endings ricocheting under her gentle ministrations. He wanted to give her what she wanted.

And yet, when Hermione’s hands rested just below his stomach, clumsily working at the buton on his pants, he froze. She ghosted her hands over the bulge in his pants and he ached for her even as he pushed her away, holding her at arm's length. “I’m sorry,” he muttered, unable to look at her, suddenly coming back into his body and feeling completely disheveled and unnerved.

“Severus?” Hermione asked anxiously, sounding worried. “Did I do something wrong?”

Severus shook his head. “I have to go.” Without a backwards glance, he snatched up his things and escaped into the dark night, his body still singing from her touch and his mind racing, wondering if he had just made the biggest mistake of his life.


	6. Chapter 5 - Halfway to Paradise

Severus was torn between desperately wanting Hermione to walk through the door of the cafe and praying that he could stew in his mortification and never have to face her again. Thankfully, he wasn’t given the chance to give into his worst impulses. He had barely finished opening, ignoring any questions about why he was here on what was supposed to be his day off (and thanking his lucky stars that Penny didn’t come in until noon), when the bell rang and Hermione walked inside. She gave him a smile so cheerful it seemed forced, which oddly assuage his nerves. She was as nervous as he was. Maybe this would be okay.

“Is that her?” Ace asked eagerly, looking excited. Severus swore silently. Who would have thought that having people care about you could be such an annoyance. Not that they cared, but the implications that derived from them caring made him care and put pressure for things to work out. It was a bit much and entirely self inflicted.

“You must be Ace,” Hermione said warmly.

“Hermione?” Ace asked, raising her eyebrows in a question.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” Hermione began. She nodded towards Severus. “And thanks for looking out for that one.”

Ace ducked her head, the gesture failing to hide both the furious blush that spread across her face and to the tips of her ears and the pleased look on her face. “Well, he’s been good to me. I’m happy to return the favor.”

“As lovely as this is,” Severus drawled, “‘He’ is standing right here.”

Ace rolled her eyes at him. “And ‘he’ should know that Penny will kill me if she finds out you were wasting time at work when you could be doing better things.” Hermione bit her lip, becoming suddenly interested in her gloves. Ace groaned. “You know what I mean.”

“Fine,” Severus grumbled, snatching up a to-go box and stocking it full of an assortment of muffins before turning to Hermione. “I think it’s best we go elsewhere. Where we can expect at least a modicum of privacy,” he added, glaring at Ace, who just shrugged.

“Sounds like a plan,” Hermione said, waving to Ace. “So good to meet you, hopefully I’ll see you again before I leave?”

Ace grinned toothily at her. “Count on it.”

* * *

“Thank you for agreeing to come here,” Severus muttered, stacking the muffins on a plate and sliding it across his kitchen island towards Hermione. 

“Of course,” she replied, her tone telling him there was plenty she was leaving unsaid.

“I just...I need to explain.”

Smiling warmly, Hermione reached out and placed her hand on his. “No. You don’t. It’s simple, really. We were moving too fast for you. I get it. There’s no shame in that.”

Severus winced. “It’s not just that, though.”

“Okay,” Hermione said, her voice full of reassurance. “What is it?”

“This is all new to me, Hermione,” he began. 

“I know,” she replied. “You’ve told me this before.”

Severus shook his head. “No. All of this. Every aspect.” Much to his chagrin, she continued to frown at him, not getting it. “I’ve never had sex, Hermione.”

Hermione winced. “This is my fault. I really should have put two and two together when you told me about the kissing…”

Severus looked down at his fingers, unable to meet her gaze. “I could have been more explicit.”

Placing a hand over his, Hermione leaned closer. “I should have known better than to push you to do something you didn’t want to do.”

Shaking his head, Severus finally looked up at her. “That’s the thing. I wanted to very much. It was just...a lot.”

“Tell you what,” Hermione proposed. “From now on, if you’re ever feeling overwhelmed, or I’m moving too fast for you, I need you to just tell me, okay? I’ll give you space if that’s what you need. I just don’t want you feeling ashamed for being nervous. It’s completely natural.”

Severus grimaced. “For a teenager, perhaps.”

“For anyone,” Hermione replied firmly. “And I can imagine it’s probably even more of a challenge, taking something so abstract and having it all come to life all at once.”

Severus nodded, surprised at how accurately she summed it up. “This is the first time it’s ever seemed like something that could really happen in real life. Which of course is frightening.”

“Ever?”

“Ever,” he confirmed with a sigh. 

“What about…” she didn’t even have to finish her sentence.

Severus shrugged. “It’s complicated.” Sighing, he ran his fingers through his hair.

Hermione gave him what he interpreted as a reassuring smile. “Good thing I’m so brilliant, then.”

Severus hesitated. “By the time I got old enough to really have any kind of…urges, I’d blown things up with Lily. I think for a while she was just my best friend and by the time I realized there was more to what I was feeling, I’d destroyed our friendship and the possibility of anything else. And I knew it. So I moved on as best I could. But I never really found anyone else who piqued my interest.”

He picked up a fork, fiddling it between his fingers a little to give his hands something to do. Normally when he thought about this part of his life he'd distract himself by trying out an intricate new recipe. That wasn’t an option now. 

“There were more important things to worry about,” he continued. “First getting in too deep with the Death Eaters. Losing the part of myself that only Lily had seen. Then, after I failed to save her…” His throat tightened and he had to pause for a minute. “There wasn’t room in my life for anyone then. I couldn’t trust anyone, I couldn’t put anyone at risk. So I didn’t bother looking. And for the most part, I was okay. There were certain things I lacked but I didn’t feel like my celibacy was depriving me of much.”

He sighed. “Then I came here. Even if I had my secrets, I had no reason to hide, no reason that I couldn’t trust someone. But twenty years of fearing the worst and acting accordingly tells you otherwise. I tried dating, but it was all so superficial. I could only be myself, be the self I never dreamed I possibly could be, if I felt comfortable around someone. But I never could get to that point because the whole thing just put me on edge and I was so uncomfortable.”

“That sounds rough,” Hermione said sympathetically. 

Severus shrugged. “I just thought I was unlucky. It wouldn’t have been the first time.” He rubbed at his temple tiredly. “Penny thinks I’m demisexual.”

Hermione’s eyes lit up. “That would make sense!”

Severus raised his eyebrows. “You know what that is?”

Hermione gave him a deadpan look. “My husband came out as bi, you think I didn’t spend hours doing a deep dive into everything I could get my hands on about sexuality and gender?”

A smile fought its way to Severus’ face. “Fair point.”

“So,” Hermione said slowly, her eyes not leaving his. “You feel emotionally connected to me.”

Severus hesitated only a moment. “I’m fairly certain.”

“Even though we’ve only really known each other a few days? Like this anyways.”

Severus groaned. “It’s illogical. I know that. But maybe it’s not that straightforward. You’re the only one who knows everything about me. What I left behind, what I’ve built here. And you somehow want to still be here, having this incredibly awkward conversation.”

“That must feel freeing,” Hermione agreed. 

“I’ve never thought so little about how to act as I have these days with you. I thought that was just something in stories, I didn’t realize it actually happened in real life.” He made a face. “My apologies, that was sappy.”

“No,” Hermione said firmly, walking around the table so she could stand right in front of him, one hand resting on his shoulder and the other on his cheek. “It’s incredibly sweet.” She leaned in and kissed him tenderly, rubbing her hand across his shoulder and down his arm soothingly. 

“Listen,” she said softly, pulling back. “This is a big deal. Your first time always is, but given how long you’ve waited for it to feel like the right time…” She pressed another kiss to his forehead. “I don’t want you to read this as lack of interest, okay?” Severus nodded, confused. “But I don’t want to rush this. If you aren’t ready, you aren’t ready.” Hermione took his right hand, squeezing it tightly. “I don’t want you to feel rushed because of the time constraints of my visit.”

“But-”

“I’m not saying no,” Hermione reiterated. “But let’s spend more time together. Make sure this is really what you want.” She stroked his face tenderly. “I don’t want to be another thing you regret.”

Severus didn’t know how to put his swirl of emotions into words. Didn’t know how to explain that he could never regret anything with her, only if he once again screwed up things beyond repair. Instead, he nodded once to show he understood. Then she was pulling him close, holding him reassuringly in her arms. Severus shut his eyes tightly. 

It felt too good to be true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title of this chapter comes from the song [Halfway to Paradise](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MTXBQp5OgI).


	7. Chapter 6 - Bearing Fruit

Hermione breathed in the crisp and cool fall air deeply. She was grateful for the warm red Tartan scarf Seevrus had lent her, which matched the emerald one wound firmly around his neck. His black woolen coat flared out a little at the bottom, more stylized than most Muggle men’s clothing. It suited him. It didn’t billow like his old robes had, but the shape gave a similar effect. The familiarity felt comforting in a way she wasn’t sure it should.

“I've never gone apple picking,” said Hermione, shoving her hands deep into her pockets for warmth, not wanting to overthink herself out of what was promising to be a fun day.

“Never? Severus asked, sounding a little surprised. “I’d have imagined that it would be an ideal family activity.”

Hermione sighed deeply. “This is the kind of thing I usually just don't have the time for, even with the kids. I try my best to be there as much as I can, but one person can only do so much.” She shrugged. “I think I’ve done a good job. Hopefully they won’t hold my failure in giving them experience picking produce against me.”

“I can’t imagine a task that you couldn’t complete admirably,” Severus said softly. Hermione looked at him, still a little shocked at the tenderness in his gaze despite the events of the past few days. 

“Despite what publishers might think, parenting really is one of the few things you can’t learn from a book. Which does put me at a slight disadvantage. But I do think I managed to fumble my way through without too many casualties.” She shrugged. “And who knows, now that I’ll be an expert apple picker by the end of the day, perhaps it’s not too late to do something like this with them.”

“Well, then,” said Severus. “I'm glad I get the opportunity to share this with you.”

They stopped at the shack at the entrance, picking up large wooden baskets with a metal handle at the top. Severus handed her two and took two himself. Hermione raised an eyebrow at him. “Just how many apples are we picking today?”

Severus grinned. “As many as we can carry.”

Hermione looked at them skeptically. “Can you really eat all these apples?”

Chuckling, Severus shook his head. “Goodness, no. I’ll be baking with most of these, mainly things to give away or bring to the shelter.”

“That’s lovely,” Hermione said, swinging her basket a little in nervous anticipation. “It’s really great you know. Seeing how invested you are in this community.” She hesitated. “It’s nice to see that people around here value you. That it doesn’t take you dying, or rather your supposed death, for the best of you to become apparent.”

Severus shrugged, not meeting her eyes. “It’s much easier, I suppose, without all the baggage.”

“I can imagine,” Hermione agreed, shaking her head. “Come on, today is supposed to be about having fun, yes?”

Nodding, Severus led her down a path with rows of trees branching out on either side. He pointed at the hand painted signs at the end of the path indicating the different varieties, explaining which ones were best for eating, which were best for baking. Passing a sign strongly demanding that the trees should not be climbed, he led her down the row labeled Macintosh, past a few trees swarming with college age students, a few who waved at Severus, who nodded back.

“You know them?” Hermione asked as they made their way to the much emptier end of the row, the trees brimming with ripe apples. 

“They go to school in town, come to the cafe fairly regularly. I know a lot of people in this town by sight and how they take their coffee and not much else,” he admitted. “Ah, here we are,” he added, stopping by the last tree. “Now, you’ll know when they are ready if you give them a gentle tug,” Severus explained, reaching up to grasp the red and green spotted fruit and tugging every so gently before it popped off, the branch springing back slightly before bobbing back into place. “If you feel any kind of resistance, it's not ready to be picked.”

“Got it,” Hermione said nodding, taking it as seriously as if there would be a test on the subject. Taking a step forward, she gave it a try, a feeling of connectedness to nature overwhelming her unexpectedly as she touched the apple, her hands brushing against the coarse leaves and twigs on the way. She knew that enjoying this was a luxury, that many people were paid far too little for backbreaking work to feed people who were totally removed from where their food came from. Still, it was humbling in a way. The more she gathered, the more she could appreciate that labor even if what she was doing couldn’t even really compare. 

They filled up a bushell with the Macs and then moved on to Empire and Granny Smith. They had reached the row of Gala last. Hermione wasn’t quite sure how she was going to carry two full buckets; she was already carrying her full one with both hands, the empty basket looped over her arm and banging against everything. Maybe if there was no one around she could risk a charm. 

Unfortunately, the Galas seemed to be more picked over than the other trees`. There were still plenty of apples on the trees, but most of them seemed to be far too high up. They moved down the row, trying to get what they could reach, but the last bucket was only half full. Towards the end of the aisle, however, Hermione spotted a step ladder.

“Here we go,” she said, positioning it under the tree closest to them.

“Careful,” Severus warned, holding the ladder steady as she climbed. Hermione picked as many apples as she could reach, handing them down to Severus who placed them in the bucket. She had just about gotten all she could reach when the breeze made the leaves flutter, revealing their petticoats and the perfect looking apple. Reaching as far as she could, Hermione tried to reach it, her fingertips just grazing the surface. If only she could get an inch closer. She stood on her tiptoes, grabbing on to the apple, exclaiming, “Got it!” just as she lost her footing. With a shriek, she fell, landing heavily in Severus’ arms. He’d cast the ladder aside once she had been clear of it, focusing only on stopping her descent. As a result, she was draped in his arms like he had dipped her while dancing.

Breathing heavily, Hermione looked up at Severus, grinning sheepishly up at his worried face. “I guess I haven’t got it,” she said breathlessly.

“No,” Severus said, shifting her up a little and slipping the apple from her hand, but not for a second letting go of her. “But I have.”

“I’d really like to kiss you right now,” Hermione announced, her heart still racing. Severus didn’t reply, he merely pulled her flush against him, crushing his mouth onto hers. Hermione groaned into his mouth, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. He was becoming more confident every time he kissed her, and it was exhilarating every single time. Slowly, he walked them back until her back was pressed against the trunk of the tree between two large limbs. Hermione knew they were in public, knew that they couldn’t get too carried away. But tucked up against the treet like this, she felt sheltered, like they were in their own little world. And she loved it.

The illusion was quickly shattered as out of nowhere, a ripe apple pelted down towards them, smacking Severus right in the shoulder before bouncing off like in a cartoon. Abruptly, Severus jumped back, cursing as he looked bewildered around for the offending piece of fruit. Slapping her hand over her mouth, Hermione began to cackle uncontrollably. Severus looked at her, hurt and confused, and she wanted to explain, but the laughs had taken over her body and she was at their mercy. All she could do was lean back against the trunk nestled between the branches and ride it out.

Naturally, this jostled the tree just enough to let loose three more apples, which only made her laugh harder. She pointed to them to try and get her point across. Frowning, Severus looked between the apples and herself, bent over and out of breath, before he relaxed, suddenly seeming to understand, even chuckling a little himself. Reaching out a hand, he pulled Hermione into his arms, holding her tight against his chest as she got through the worst of the giggles.

Once she had composed herself a bit more, Hermione looked languidly up at him, pressing a tender kiss to his lips. “Thank you.”

“For what?” he asked, his voice soft but raspy. 

“I haven’t laughed that hard in years,” she admitted. “I’m really having fun today.”

“Good,” Severus said, sounding satisfied. “As am I.”

* * *

Severus heaved a sigh of relief as he placed the last bushel of apples in the back of his car and swung the hatchback down forcefully. Rubbing his hands together, he turned to face Hermione. “Now that those are taken care of,” he said, nodding to the apples. “How about some ice cream?”

Hermione looked at him in surprise. “Isn’t it a bit chilly for that?” she asked.

Severus scoffed. “It’s never too cold for ice cream. Besides, this is the best time for seasonal flavors. Pumpkin, naturally. But this place also has gingersnap and of course apple crumble.”

“They sell ice cream at the apple orchard?” Hermione asked quizzically as they began to walk back in the direction they’d come from. 

“Of course,” Severus said. “They actually get a lot of business. Every fall some of the local colleges pick a beautiful day to cancel classes and encourage the students to get out into nature. This is quite the hot spot. Though we don’t do too badly ourselves at the cafe. A good mix of people packing a picnic lunch and those who take the extra day to get even more homework done.”

“Well,” Hermione replied, looking a bit scandalized at the idea of cancelling school for anything quite so frivolous. “All of those flavors sound amazing. I want to try them all.”

"Three scoops it is,” Severus proclaimed definitively.

As they got closer, they passed a few people after they’d come out of the line, tilting their heads and they licked a loop around the perimeter trying desperately to contain the dripping ice cream. Hermione’s eyes widened. “That one scoop was gigantic,” she whispered, shocked. “I can’t possibly eat three of those.”

Severus chuckled. “We could split it, if you’d prefer. In a bowl, of course,” he added hastily, feeling his face heat a bit at the thought of them both sharing a cone. It seemed far too intimate to have both of their roaming tongues on display like that. Hermione snorted, and for a moment Severus worried she could see into his mind. He would, of course, be able to detect such an intrusion, but if anyone were capable of mastering that skill it would be she.

“Considering I don’t have a problem with sharing saliva in other contexts,” she whispered soft enough so only he could hear. “I can’t see how I can find fault with sharing food.”

Severus was fairly certain he was blushing now. He wasn’t used to this, such frank discussion about bodily functions. It generally fell into the category of things that grossed him out in the abstract if he thought about them too much. The idea of kissing Hermione was somehow different; he could forget about the mechanics and his clinical breakdown of human affection and just get lost in the moment, in how she felt when he held her. How she made him feel.

“Come on, we’re next,” Hermione said, tugging him forward. “You order, I’m paying this time.” Severus began to protest, but Hermione held up her hand. “My treat. I like to be able to contribute from time to time, you know. I don’t need to be taken care of, particularly not financially.”

Nodding wordlessly, Severus turned and ordered, grabbing a wad of brown paper napkins and two compostable potato based spoons as Hermione paid and led her to a small table under a rainbow umbrella.

“You know,” he began once they sat across from each other, spoons poised above the dessert. “Me wanting to pay for things...it’s not that I think you need to be taken care of.”

Hermione looked at him skeptically, digging her spoon into the pumpkin first. “Really?” She took a bite and closed her eyes, her face melting into a blissed contentment. “Oh sweet Merlin, this is delicious.”

Severus grinned. “Thought you’d like it. Goes really well with the gingersnap,” he added, gesturing to the golden brown scoop with crumbles of cookie. “I just...even after all these years, I still can’t get over the fact that I have disposable income. If I want to buy something for someone I care about, I can just do it. I didn’t have that growing up. I barely had enough for myself.” He shrugged, feeling self conscious. “It’s a nice place to find myself, that’s all.”

Hermione smiled at him in understanding, giving his hand a squeeze. “I get it. Not firsthand, but I grew up with Harry, remember? He went through a similar kind of thing once he found out what his parents had left him after living like he did at the Dursleys.”

Severus couldn’t help but twist his face in a sneer of disgust. “I never liked Petunia, but the thought of her depriving her sister’s child of so much out of what, spite? I know I wasn’t much better where he was concerned, but she was supposed to give him a home. It makes my blood boil.”

Hermione sighed. “Tell me about it. Even without a shared history, I couldn’t stand hearing about what Harry’s life was like in that place. And I know that he downplayed it for us.”

Severus grinned wryly. “Who would have thought Potter and I’d have had so much in common?”

“I think that’s part of why you hated him so much,” Hermione added, making quick work of her half of the bowl. The pumpkin was nearly gone and she’d started in on the apple crumble. Whatever hesitations she’d had about portion sizes had clearly been unwarranted. 

“I hated him because I was tasked with keeping him alive and he repeatedly chose to unnecessarily put himself in harm’s way,” Severus grumbled. 

“I think you saw yourself in him, at least a little,” Hermione said quietly. “And despite everything else, he had chances you never were given. He had support you never did.”

“That is true,” Severus conceded quietly. “The second part at least.” This conversation was so far out of his comfort zone; Severus was rather shocked that his defences weren’t automatically flying into place. It had been decades since he’d felt this unguarded around someone. It happened so fast, if it had been anyone else, he wouldn’t have trusted it. But inexplicably, Hermione made him feel safe in a way he’d never known he ached for. Tears pricked at the corners of his eyes as he was overwhelmed by this realization, but he blinked them away hastily. Let her think they were just a product of a sensitive subject.”

“I think the older we get, the clearer all that is for Harry. For all of us.”

Severus sighed. “I am still responsible for my actions.”

“Yes,” Hermione agreed. “But understanding the complexity behind them was a comfort.” She shook her head. “I’m sorry, here I go dredging up the past again.”

Severus wanted to try and put into words what he was feeling, but she was offering him a lifeline, and he grasped it with both hands. “Don’t worry about it,” he said simply, pointing at the cup with his spoon. “Glad to see you enjoyed this,” he added, grinning wickedly. 

Hermione blushed. “I’ve barely left you any, I can get you some more if you’d like.”

Severus shook his head. “I’m quite alright. It’s been lovely watching you enjoy it.” He nabbed one of the last remaining spoonfuls. “It’s too bad, you just missed the garlic festival. If you ever get the chance to try garlic ice cream, take it. It’s surprisingly incredible.” Hermione looked like she was trying not to laugh. “What?” he demanded. 

“Oh, nothing,” she gasped, her mouth twisting upwards into a grin. “It’s just...I guess we know with absolute certainty now that those vampire rumors about you are categorically false if you speak so lovingly of garlic ice cream.”

Severus huffed. “I’d have hoped that would have been obvious before this moment.”

“Oh, it most certainly was,” Hermione said softly, the light dancing in her eyes. “It doesn’t stop the irony from being incredibly funny.” She scooped up the last of the soupy ice cream with her spoon for the last bite, a little dribbling out of the corner of her mouth. 

“Let me,” Severus said without thinking, brushing it away with his thumb. In retrospect, a napkin would have been more prudent, but his reflexes didn’t operate by logic it seemed. Hermione turned her head just enough to lick the drop off his finger, her eyes locked on his. Severus felt a rush of desire, of wanting to screw taking things slow and bring her back to his place. To forget that this wasn’t much more than a moment, a blip in each of their lives. It might have been wishful thinking, but he thought that he saw a flash of something similar reflected in Hermione’s eyes.

Pulling back, Severus broke the spell. Crumpling up his napkin, he tossed it in the empty cardboard container. “Now that we’ve had our fill of sugar, let’s go back to my place and bake.”


	8. Chapter 7 - Too Many Ghosts

After spending the entire afternoon slicing apples and mostly watching Severus craft them into works of art, it felt good to get out of the house again for dinner. The narrow little restaurant was cozy, with local art and photographs on display for sale on the walls. Hermione let her eyes close as she bit into the lavash wrap, the spicy ground lamb cooled by fresh hummus and veggies, savoring the first bite. She was thoroughly enjoying all of the local spots Severus was taking her to, getting to see this town through his eyes. And tastebuds, apparently. 

“I take it you liked that?” Severus asked, smirking openly, his own sandwich waiting in it’s foil jacket on his plate.”

“Definitely,” Hermione agreed around the food still in her mouth. It was disgusting to talk with a mouth full of food, she knew, but she didn’t care. And the self satisfied look on Severus’ face told her that he didn’t either. “I’m really enjoying testing out your expertise.”

Unwrapping his meal, Severus carefully folded back the foil. “That’s the beauty of being in one place for so long. Where you can actually get to know the community like this.”

“I wish I had something like this back home,” Hermione said wistfully before taking another bite. “Out of an abundance of precaution my interaction with the larger world is heavily mediated.”

Something shifted in Severus’ face, and he set his food down, untouched. “We do live very different lives, don’t we,” he said quietly.

“We do,” Hermione replied, a sinking feeling in her stomach. She didn’t want the real world to intrude on this, whatever this was. Not yet. 

Severus shook his head. “It’s foolish to be so shocked by that. It’s easy to forget sometimes.”

Hermione reached out to take his hand. “I know exactly what you mean.” She pointed to his plate. “If you don’t eat that by the time I finish mine, I might just have to take care of it for you,” she warned. 

With a snort, Severus bit into his food and they quickly fell back into their comfortable routine, the momentary intrusion of reality on hold for the time being. It wasn’t until they were settled a block down the street eating frozen yogurt that Hermione dared ask the question that had been swirling around in her head for weeks. The one that she could ignore as long as she didn’t have an answer.

“Do you ever think you’d go back?” she asked quietly, stabbing her pistachio yogurt with a compostable spoon, unable to meet his eyes. To see her hope or disappointment reflected in his eyes.

Severus didn’t reply for a few moments that seemed to stretch on for hours. “I think not,” he finally said, his voice full of quiet regret. “There are just too many ghosts.”

Nodding, Hermione took an overly large bite, her momentary brain freeze a welcome distraction from her embarrassment for wanting a different answer despite knowing all of the facts. Once she had recovered, she squeaked, “That’s certainly understandable.”

“I want you to know,” he began slowly, and Hermione finally dared meet his gaze. “That before this week, I wouldn’t have given that answer a second thought. I won’t deny that there are some aspects about a return that would be...tempting.” Hermione shivered a little, the way he drew out the last word making her long for something she knew she could never expect to hope for. “But my life is here now, I can’t turn my back on it. Not after I worked so hard to build it up.”

Hermione smiled at him sadly. “For different reasons, but I can say the same thing about where my life is right now.”

Severus’ face twisted into a sour mix between a smile and a scowl. “A fine twist of fate this is, isn’t it? Another time, another place...”

“Perhaps,” Hermione replied. “But I for one am glad we met in this time and place. And don’t know what can happen after I go home, but I want to make the most of the time we still have.”

Severus softened again, smiling tentatively. “As do I.”


	9. Chapter 8 - Unhappy Returns

Hermione sighed heavily, staring down into her cup of tea. “I can’t believe that I have to leave tomorrow.” Something twisted in Severus’ stomach, but he kept quiet. How could he complain? He knew what he was getting himself into, and so did she. But he hadn’t quite expected to get so attached so quickly. It was disorienting and he needed more time that they didn’t have. It was more than that, though. He craved it. But he didn’t want to say that, didn’t want to presume that he was reading her signals correctly. That she didn’t want this to end either.

“Neither can I,” he said, making a point of keeping his voice even and level. “But I look forward to making the most of what we have. I don’t know if you have any plans?”

Hermione shook her head. “Truthfully, I don’t really care where we go.”

Severus grinned. “I was hoping that you would say that. I thought you might like a closer look at my collection?”

Hermione smirked over the rim of her cup. “Is that a line?”

Severus snorted. “My books,” he clarified, letting a hint of feigned annoyance into his voice. “Although I was hoping you would stay and let me cook you dinner. And if anything were to happen after that...I would not be opposed.”

“Oh,” Hermione said, sounding a little shocked but looking a little excited.

“And before you ask if I am sure, know that I wouldn’t have brought it up if I wasn’t.”

Hermione opened her mouth to speak, but before any words could come out of her mouth, an overly cheerful mechanical tone emitted from her bag.

Severus arched an eyebrow at her. “I still can’t get over  _ you _ with a cellphone.”

Hermione rolled her eyes, though her face had shifted into a serious businesslike mask. “I had to be reachable in the Muggle world at all times. Besides, my parents are Muggles, remember? It was only supposed to be for emergencies though. Aside from Mum and Dad, only my assistant, Harry and Ron have the number.” With a practiced flick, Hermione answered the device. Pressing it up against her ear, she frowned, her brow furrowed in concentration as she listened, peppering the caller with short questions. Dred filled Severus as he busied his hands with the sugar packets, deliberately trying not to overhear her end of the conversation. He didn’t look up until she’d hung up, setting the phone down on the table with a little more force than strictly necessary. 

“I have to go back,” she said, crestfallen. “There’s a crisis brewing and I need to be there to ward it off.”

“What’s going on?” Severus asked curiously.

Hermione winced. “It’s classified, I’m afraid. Nothing earth shattering, but if I don’t step in soon it will give Rita Skeeter all sorts of fodder to play with about the ineptitude of my administration and my lack of leadership,” she spat. Shaking her head, she looked directly at him. “I’m so sorry, Severus, I was really looking forward to the time we had left.”

Severus nodded solemnly, unable to meet her eyes. “You’ll be leaving as soon as you're packed I presume?”

“Unfortunately,” Hermione said regretfully. “Believe me, if I had a choice…”

Severus smiled tightly. “The Minister’s work is never done.”

Hermione winced. “Essentially.”

“Would you…” Severus hesitated, wanting a million impossible things and not knowing how to ask. “Can you stop back here before you go?” He finally looked up, and saw that she understood what he couldn’t bring himself to ask.

“I can do you one better,” Hermione said with a knowing smile. “My portkey isn’t for a few more hours. Can you pack me something for the road and meet me at the bed and breakfast? With two of us working we can have a little time before I go for...other things.” 

Relief flooded through his body, though Severus knew full well that it was only a temporary reprieve. 

“Perfect,” he replied, giving her hand a little squeeze. “I’ll see you there.”

* * *

Hermione packed at record speed. She wanted to be finished by the time Severus came by so they could maximize the last few hours they had together. The second she returned to the room, she called Maggie back, putting the phone on speaker as she mindlessly flicked her wand, her belongings rushing into place. She might not be able to be on the scene for a while, but she could get things rolling until then so she could hit the ground running. It felt good, in a way, to get back to her regular routine, even though part of her wanted to stay in this little college town forever, hidden away from all the demands on her time and energy. 

By the time Severus knocked on her door, she felt fairly confident that the situation was under as much control as it could be with her at a distance and every last item she had brought on this trip was packed neatly away. 

Severus smiled at her tentatively, a large canvas bag in his hands. “There isn’t a chance that you managed to sort everything out in the last forty-five minutes, is there?”

Hermione looked at him regretfully. “I’ve plugged the hole but there’s still a crack in the dam.”

Severus nodded once, resigned. “Wishful thinking.”

“On both our parts,” she assured him, gesturing for him to enter. “What do you have there?”

“A few things for your journey,” he explained, handing the bag to her.

“I’m not going to be eating anything while taking the portkey,” she reminded him, eyeing multiple boxes of cookies and pastries.

“I thought your staff might appreciate a treat. As might your son. I recognize I’ve monopolized your time and you haven’t had much opportunity to gather the typical presents many expect when one returns from holiday.”

Hermione smiled at him warmly. “This wasn’t that kind of trip, but this was so thoughtful, thank you. Everyone will love this. And Hugo takes after his father; the way to his heart is through his stomach.” Hermione was suddenly struck with an overwhelming desire for Hugo and Severus to meet. Rosie too. She wondered what they would think of him. Wondered if his experience with Penny and her daughter would have softened him around children. Wondered if he’d like to meet them, to get to know them more than just as Mum’s special friend?

Shaking herself, Hermione forced herself to remain in the present. There was no point going down that rabbit hole of what ifs. She knew where things stood between her and Severus, even if they both wished for different circumstances. His life was here, and he’d told her himself that he wasn’t up for leaving it. Best not to dwell on the impossible when she could enjoy a last few lovely moments of denial.

* * *

“I know that you don’t have much spare time in your real life,” Severus continued, pulling one more thing out of his coat, feeling like it was less than adequate. “But I remembered how enthusiastic you were about this volume when I first showed you my library. I’d be happy to lend it to you.”

Hermione took it, cradling it like it was precious treasure. “I look forward to making the time. And discussing its merits with you.”

Severus looked at her in surprise. “You would?”

“I’m sure that you would bring some wonderful insights,” she said, looking at him significantly. “You do have an email address, don’t you?” she asked, looking a little uncertain for a moment. She looked hesitant at her bags. “I know you gave me a card when I first arrived but it’s probably at the bottom of my luggage at this point.”

Nodding, Severus pulled out his business card. “This is for the cafe, but it goes to me.”

“Good,” Hermione said, pocketing it and handing him a slip of paper with her own neat handwriting. “This is mine. I think all things considered, Muggle communications would be the most secure. Sometimes the antiquated attitudes of the Wizarding community come in handy.”

A lump formed in the back of his throat. “So is this goodbye?” his voice was embarrassingly tight, full of emotion in a way he still wasn’t used to.

“I know our lives are incompatible.” Hermione said, taking his hand. “But these past few days...I haven’t felt like this in so long, Severus. I have to leave but I’m not ready to say goodbye to you.”

Something Severus vaguely recognized as hope bubbled in his chest. “Neither am I.”

“Good,” Hermione said firmly. “Now then, I have an hour before I have to leave to get to the portkey. And I for one would like to make the most of it.”

Not needing to be told twice, Severus pulled her close and kissed her like he never would get the chance to again. 


	10. Chapter 9 - Crisis Averted

Severus knew that he probably should have returned to work after Hermione left. The bustle of the cafe would have been a good distraction from the sudden void that her departure had left in his life. Yet the thought of having to be around people, of having to put on his customer service face and be _nice_ to people, was unbearable. As much as he missed her company, being alone was what he seemed to need at the moment.

He felt rather foolish for getting so attached so quickly. He’d known from the start that she would leave; she’d been upfront about the timetable of her trip. And yet he’d allowed himself the kind of fantasy he’d long ago shunned after it failed him in his youth. An infinity of possible futures shared with someone all laid out, flashing through his mind instantaneously and unbidden. It had happened to him with Lily, he’d fallen in love with the idea of them in love that he missed the warning signs of his own behaviors, even if she tried to pull him back from the brink. And while he knew that now he was older and theoretically wiser, he’d lived the intervening years in fear of making the same mistake twice. 

And his self doubt made him question the likelihood of her actually keeping in touch. People always said things like that. Even if he hadn’t had enough friends to experience it firsthand, he understood that proximity holds a massive sway over relationships of all sorts. Everyone has their own lives, and even those with the best of intentions often find themselves drifting apart.

Still, there was no reason he couldn’t reach out first. Perhaps it would seem overeager, but the last thing he wanted to appear was indifferent. Grabbing a snack from the kitchen, Severus sat down at his laptop and adjusted his glasses. Opening a browser, he began to write.

* * *

Hermione knocked quietly on Harry’s open door. “Do you have a minute?”

Grinning, her friend looked up from his paperwork, casting aside his quill and quickly circling the desk to pull her into a warm hug. “I always have a minute for you. Welcome back, intrepid traveler.”

“Far too soon,” Hermione grumbled, squeezing him back before turning to shut the door behind her. 

Harry looked sheepishly. “Sorry about that.”

Hermione waved a hand dismissively, taking the seat across from Harry’s desk and gesturing for him to join her. “It’s not your department. It comes with the job, you know how it is.”

“I do,” Harry agreed, nodding as he resumed his seat, shuffling the scattered parchments he’d been working on into some semblance of a pile. “Everything resolved? I’d assume it is if you have time to pop down here for a little chat.” He dug into his desk drawer and pulled out two small Honeyduke’s chocolate bars, pushing one across the wooden surface towards her. Hermione accepted gratefully; she hadn’t eaten anything for hours, not since she had scarfed down the meal Severus had given her between meetings.

“Crisis averted,” she confirmed. “But that’s not what I came here to talk to you about.”

Harry frowned, leaning across the desk towards her in concern. “Is everything alright?”

Hermione smiled softly, her mind flitting across all of the ways the past week had been alright and beyond, though she wasn’t about to tell Harry all of _those_ details. “Everything’s fine. I just...had a bit of a surprise on my trip. I’m telling you, and I’ll probably tell Ron and the kids soon, and I don’t mind if you tell Ginny since I’ll probably want to talk to her as well. But other than that, I need you to swear that nothing I tell you leaves this room.”

Harry’s frown deepened. “Hermione, I’ve been in this line of work long enough to understand how confidentiality works.”

“This isn’t a professional matter,” she pressed on. “Mostly.”

Harry rubbed at his temple. “Hermione-”

“Snape’s alive.”

Harry shot up in his seat, his face slack with shock. Clearly this was the last thing he expected to come out of her mouth. “What?”

“We were right. He faked his death and made a new life for himself in the town I stayed in.”

“Blimey…” Harry exhaled, still taking it all in.

“Tell me about it. I ran into him when I stopped in his shop for a bite to eat.”

Harry raised his eyebrows. “His what?”

“He runs a charming little cafe. He’s really established himself in the community. And get this; everyone loves him there.”

Harry chuckled, shaking his head. “Merlin…”

“I know, it was a surprise to me too. But he’s different there. He’s had two decades to live outside of the shadow of all this,” she said, gesturing around, hoping that Harry understood her meaning. “Soft doesn’t feel like the right way to put it, but he’s a lot less rough around the edges.”

“Well then, good for him,” Harry said, grinning. “That’s what I always hoped for.”

“I know, and that’s what I told him.”

“I’d like to see him,” Harry said, grabbing for his quill again. “What did you say the name of his place was?”

“I didn’t,” Hermione said, an edge in her voice. Not that it would be hard for Harry to figure out when he took a closer look, but she needed to head him off. “Listen, Harry, I don’t think that’s such a good idea.”

Harry looked annoyed, and for a moment it was like they were back in Gryffindor tower and she was trying to talk sense into him again. “Why the hell not?”

“It was a fluke that I found him. But if you start poking around, that might draw undue attention.”

“I can be discreet,” Harry insisted, his own voice hardening a little. 

“He’s living as a Muggle, Harry. He’s taken great pains to distance himself from our world. I won’t be responsible for blowing all of that hard work.”

Harry frowned at her again. “He really got to you.”

Hermione shook her head. “Not in the way you're thinking. I just...he’s made so much progress, he’s living the best life he could given the circumstances. He’s happy, Harry. I can’t ruin that. Not even for you. However,” she added, giving Harry a significant look. “We are planning on staying in touch. Through Muggle means, of course, much more secure on our end. I’d be happy to convey a message.”

“Oh, yeah, sure,” Harry muttered, looking a little sheepish before a look of confusion crossed his face. “You’re staying in touch?”

Hermione felt her face flush, and she willed it away in vain. “As it turns out, we discovered we have a lot in common. We got...close.”

Harry looked horrified. “Hermione, _please_ don’t tell me you slept with him.”

Hermione glared. “Harry Potter, I will not deign to reply to that impertinent question.”

Harry removed his glasses, rubbing his eyes. “Hermione…”

“He hasn’t been our teacher for over twenty years, Harry,” Hermione spat, her annoyance intensified by her overtired state. “What two consenting adults do in private is none of your concern.”

“You really like him.” Harry said, more of a statement than a question. 

“I do.”

Harry sighed. “You know that you won’t be able to keep this a secret forever. Not with the scrutiny you’re under.”

“I’ll be careful. Besides, neither of us were anticipating anything serious. It’s quite possible whatever this connection is will fade over time apart.” Hermione’s heart ached as the words came out of her mouth, knowing that in all likelihood they would come to pass and feeling forcefully that was the last thing she wanted. “Harry, I haven’t had anything like this in years. I know how to take care of myself. Just let me enjoy this.”

With a resigned look, Harry nodded. “Fine. I know better than to try and tell you what to do with your life. And…” he hesitated. “You know I love Ron, but you deserve to be happy too.”

Hermione smiled softly. “I’m glad we agree.”

* * *

Hermione wasn’t sure how it was possible to be both this exhausted and this wired at the same time. She knew that tomorrow would be just as busy, that she really needed a good night sleep. But she was still on vacation time, quite literally, and it didn’t feel nearly as late as it was as she stumbled into her house.

Her eyes landed on the bag Severus had given her when they parted. Her growling stomach ached for one of the cookies she knew was boxed up in there, but if she had one she was liable to eat the whole thing, and she really did want to leave some from Hugo when he came back in the morning from Ron’s. With a reluctant sigh, Hermione opened the cupboard, anticipating it to be as empty as she’d left it. Surprisingly, there was a dish covered with a stasis charm with a note in Ron’s handwriting stuck onto it with Spell-o tape.

_H,_

_Harry told me you’d be coming back early, figured you wouldn’t have time to cook and Hugo was worried you’d forget to eat. He helped me make this, it’s quite good!_

_Glad to have you back on the right side of the ocean. Happy to keep Hugo with me if you need more time to focus on work, just keep me posted._

_-R_

Smiling, Hermione helped herself to a delicious portion of quiche, not bothering to heat it up. Scarfing it down far too quickly, Hermione sat for a moment, only partially satisfied by the fullness of her physical hunger. Still restless, she wandered around the house until she caught sight of her computer. 

It seemed unlikely that he would have written so soon. Yet Hermione couldn’t help but be tempted to check. She didn’t think she was up for writing anything herself, but it would quiet at least one of the voices at the back of her mind. Naturally, the machine took forever to boot up, feeling the need to choose this moment to install an update. She almost gave up, deciding to at least attempt to sleep when it finally loaded. Quickly, she opened her email.

Her breath hitched in her throat as above the usual messages from her mother and a few solicitations she rarely actually looked at she saw an email from Severus. She looked at the time stamp, doing the mental calculations between her local time and his. He’d sent it within an hour of when she had left.

Stomach tightening in anticipation, she clicked on the message.

 **To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

 **From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

 **Date:** October 19, 2018, 4:03 PM

 **Subject:** Hello

Dear Hermione,

I trust that you arrived home safely and I hope that the trip wasn’t too taxing. I know that you are dealing with a crisis at the moment and might not see this right away, but I must confess that I could not stop myself from waiting any longer to write.

I want you to know that I would completely understand if, once returning to your life, you don’t actually want to continue our correspondence. You are certainly busy enough as it is and I don’t wish to become a burden on your time. I recognize that emotions sometimes can get the better of our senses and in the bright light of day you may have had a change of heart. I want to assure you that I will not be offended if this is the case.

I will always hold the time we had together in the deepest regard. I hope you will remember me fondly. 

Severus

Frowning, Hermione hit reply faster than the speed of light, her fingers flying over the keyboard as she composed her response.

* * *

 **To:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

 **From:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

 **Date:** October 20, 2018, 1:05 AM

 **Subject:** Nice try, you’re not going to get rid of me that easily

Severus,

If you truly wish to end our correspondence, I will respect your wishes. But if you are doing it out of some kind of misguided sense of chivalry, I can assure you that I can make my own decisions. I get enough of that thick headed nobleness from Harry, I don’t need it from you as well. 

Since you seem to need reassurance (though honestly given your history, I can’t really blame you, and I certainly don’t think any less of you for it), I want to reiterate that I had a wonderful time this past week. It’s rare in my position to make a new friend, yet that’s what I feel like we’ve become. Although, friend might not be quite the right word given some of the ways we spent our time together, but I think it’s a starting point at least. Right now, what we call what we are to each other is less relevant than _what_ we are to each other. All I know is that I am beyond grateful that you came into my life this way. And I would love to see where this goes.

You are right, I am incredibly busy. But one of the best things about this past week has been getting to step out of the hectic daily grind. I can’t keep running off to America every time I need a breather, but it would be nice to be able to recreate that effect with our correspondence. I do apologize in advance if I ever take too long to reply, and assure you that whatever is keeping me from writing, it’s not lack of interest. 

It’s been a long day and tomorrow promises to be another, so I must be off to bed. Goodnight, my friend, and I hope that sometime in the future I’ll be able to cash in that raincheck for the dinner we were supposed to have this evening.

Hermione

* * *

“Mum!” Hugo exclaimed, slamming into her the second she walked in the door, hugging her tightly as if his life depended on it.

“There’s my boy,” she said affectionately, pressing a kiss into his thick red hair. “I think you’ve grown since I went away,” she exclaimed, holding him out in front of her to get a better look.

“I don’t think that’s possible,” Hugo grumbled, though he looked a little pleased all the same. 

Ron came out of the kitchen, grinning as he wiped his hands on a dish towel. “How was the trip?”

Hermione hesitated, not quite sure how to answer. “Full of surprises,” she eventually settled on.

Ron frowned at her. “Hugo, can you go set the table? Mum and I will be right in there.” Nodding, Hugo gave Hermione one last hug before disappearing. “You didn’t have any trouble, did you?”

Hermione laughed. “Merlin, no, not that kind of surprise. All good, I promise. It was exactly what I needed.”

Ron’s eyes narrowed as he looked at her closely. “You met someone.”

Heart racing, Hermione raised her eyebrows. “Pardon?”

Ron waved a hand absently in her direction. “You’ve got this sort of dopey happy look on your face, and your eyes get all dreamy. It’s almost like when you were infatuated by Lockheart in second year, but less creepy.”

Hermione wondered if he would have come to the same conclusion if he knew the truth about who had put that smile on her face. She suspected he’d feel differently. Perhaps now wasn’t the time to tell him, though she knew she would have to eventually. 

“As a matter of fact I did meet someone,” she began, bracing herself for the small white lie. “But not in the way you think.” She hesitated. “Ron, Snape’s alive. And I spent the better part of the past week with him.”

Ron’s jaw dropped, looking flabbergasted. “Blimey. I mean, we suspected...are you sure it’s really him?” he asked at last. 

“Positive,” Hermione confirmed. 

Ron frowned. “You spent time with him? Why?”

Hermione shrugged. She hadn’t really dwelled on this question; at the time spending time together felt like the most natural thing to do in the world. “He’s different, Ron. I know it might sound surprising but he was actually quite pleasant to be around. And he makes the most incredible desserts, he runs a cute little cafe in the town I visited. It’s all really quite incredible.”

Ron gaped at her. “Hermione, tell me you didn’t…”

Hermione valiantly fought back the urge to roll her eyes. “Didn’t what?” she demanded, an icy tone to her voice. 

“You didn’t sleep with him, did you?”

Hermione sniffed. “You’re just as bad as Harry. So what if I did? I thought we agreed that who we each sleep with isn’t the concern of the other aside from how it might affect the children?” 

Ron’s mouth twisted as if he was holding back what he really wanted to say. “I just want you to be happy, Hermione. You know that. And I just...changed or not, I can’t see it happening with _him_.”

“Not that it’s any of your business, but I did not sleep with him,” Hermione replied tersely. 

“But you wanted to,” Ron pushed, a knowing look in his eyes.

“I’m not going to dignify that with an answer. Now, if you would like me to start disecting your sex life with Viktor…”

“Point taken, sorry,” he apologized hastily. “I just still care what happens to you.”

“I know you do,” Hermione said wearily. “And if there is anything to tell, you and the kids will be the first to know. I promise.”

* * *

 **To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

 **From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

 **Date:** October 20, 2018, 5:33 PM

 **Subject:** Re: Nice try, you’re not going to get rid of me that easily

Hermione, 

Merlin forbid I do anything like Potter, so I will gladly acquiesce to your request and let you take the lead. I must confess that I was pleased to read what you wrote, it banished my fears that I had grossly misread the situation and everything that happened was inexplicably one sided, in spite of all evidence to the contrary.

It has been quite a long time since I’ve had a regular correspondent, for reasons I’m sure you can understand. Truth be told, I’ve hardly ever had anyone sending me letters in any form. So please, bear with me as I figure out the nuance of this art form.

I am sure that you skillfully handled the crisis that spoiled our evening, and I’m confident that you’ll tackle whatever tomorrow brings with similar grace. Wishing you a restful night sleep.

Regards,

Severus


	11. Chapter 10 - A Redux of Letters

October 20, 2018

Dear Rosie,

I hope that you enjoy these cookies Mum brought back from her holiday. She made a friend there with a shop, he gave them to her to take home. I rather liked the oatmeal raisin, but I know how you feel about those. I am including one just in case, as they are quite good. If you don’t like it, I’m sure that Al will. Just don’t let him eat them all, they are intended for you.

Mum seems better than when she left, I think the time away did her good. She’s more like her normal self than I’ve seen in a while. Don’t worry too much, I’ll look after her. And Dad’s said he’ll try to check in all the time, or at least as much as won’t drive Mum up the wall. We’re all good here.

Hope that your classes are going well and that Al hasn’t dragged you into any more trouble. Uncle Harry and Aunt Ginny haven’t mentioned anything, but with everything going on, they might be trying to spare Mum and Dad some worry.

Your Brother,

Hugo

* * *

**To:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**From:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**Date:** October 21, 2018, 7:01 AM

**Subject:** Regards?

Severus,

I completely understand your lack of experience in these matters, but honestly, I think we’re past the point of such formality. Just write how you would talk. I promise I won’t judge. Unless you’re being needlessly formal. Then I reserve the right to proceed with any and all necessary judgement. You have been warned.

Hugo loved the cookies, by the way. He insisted on sending half to his sister at school. While I applaud his generosity and as a mother I’m proud of him, I do regret that there will be that many fewer for me to steal. I think you may have just ruined other cookies for me. Somehow I’ll have to keep that from Ron, he’ll be incredibly hurt if I don’t seem to be enjoying his latest experiment, which only half the time is edible to anyone other than him. Don’t get me wrong, he’s a superb cook, but sometimes he’s a tad too adventurous for his own good.

Why am I talking about Ron? You don’t want to hear about that. 

Work was thankfully quiet, so I got to spend a good portion of the day with Hugo, which was lovely after being apart for so long. I know a week doesn’t sound like much, particularly given what we’ll be facing next year when he’s off to school, but I’ve never been away from him that long before. It’s a weird thing, getting to this stage of parenthood, where they’re young enough to still need you but not so much that you can’t step away for a minute and breathe. I’m not entirely sure I like it, although I do like what came out of stepping away in this case.

Hope everyone’s doing well on your end (most especially you).

Hermione

* * *

**To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**Date:** October 22, 2018, 11:45 PM

**Subject:** Sup?

Hermione,

Per your request, I consulted Penny as to what might be a more casual way to interact, and she suggested the above as a subject line. I suspect that she may have been joking, but I grew attached and I thought you would find it amusing. I’m afraid that causal just isn’t something I really know how to do. (Does that have another meaning? Perhaps. I’ll just leave that up to you.)

I’m glad that Hugo enjoyed the cookies, and not surprised that you did as well. I thought I sent you with enough extra to last you more than a day or two? If I thought I could send you more without compromising the quality, I would in a heartbeat, though sadly I think most would get damaged in transit. And while a pile of cookie crumbles will still taste delicious, it’s just not quite the same.

Do I care specifically about Weasley? Not particularly. (Though I am making a note that you clearly have a type.) But he is a part of your life, and that is something I am most interested in hearing all that you wish to share with me. I enjoy listening to (or in this case reading) you go on about something you’re passionate about. As a lifelong cynic, your earnestness is unexpectedly refreshing. 

All the best from your ancient friend. I am, now and forever, your faithful and obedient servant.

S. Snape

* * *

October 22, 2018 

Dear Hugo,

That is good news about Mum. I know she can handle herself, but I hate thinking of her going through everything alone. You have no idea the way people are going on about everything here. People are saying the most dreadful things about both our parents, it’s unbearable. I can’t do a thing about it, because I know that punching them in the face will only reflect badly on Mum and I can’t be the cause of any more trouble for her, at least not this month. Al has actually been surprisingly unadventurous this term, which has been a nice break from the norm, though I hardly expect it to last. James has gotten in a few scuffles with some of the worst offenders, which I can’t condone but oh was it satisfying to watch. Even Scorpius has told a few people to sod off when they were going on about Dad and Uncle Viktor, a fact I made sure to write to Dad about specifically. I know his feelings on the subject, but honestly, when is he going to realize that Scorpius is nothing like his father? I know he has bigger issues on his plate at the moment, so I won’t press further. But I thought he ought to know.

Glad Mum had a good trip. And a new friend? Does Uncle Harry know? I don’t want to sound paranoid, but after everything that’s happened the past few weeks I don’t know how I feel about someone new entering her life right about now. And you said he? Do you think there is anything between them? Oh, I wish I could be home right now, but I know that Mum would never allow it for anything short of a health crisis.

The cookies were delicious, thank you for sharing. The oatmeal raisin was surprisingly tolerable, though I am glad you kept any others to yourself, since you will certainly enjoy them more than I would.

Keep me posted. Love to you and Mum.

Rosie

* * *

**To:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**From:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**Date:** October 23, 2018, 6:00 AM

**Subject:** Please tell me you aren’t starting a cult…

Severus, 

I really hope that the last part of your last message was tongue and cheek and you’re not seeking to rally around me as the supreme leader of the...I don’t even know what. I feel like I’m missing something. 

I particularly hope that is the case because today I told Hugo a bit more about my trip. And you. Nothing specific, if we aren’t defining this for ourselves I don’t think it makes sense to artificially put a label on it for him. But I also don’t want to hide things from him. He’s old enough and smart enough to figure things out on his own, and I don’t want his imagination getting the best of him. I have asked him not to share what I’ve told him, I am fairly certain that Rita Skeeter doesn’t know the first thing about email, but she’s not above trying to intercept my children’s letters. 

I don’t know if your casual tangent was purely rhetorical, but I am going to go ahead and answer it anyway. From everything I know about you, you aren’t the kind of person to do anything halfway. If you would prefer that we give this thing between us a name, I wouldn’t be opposed. I must admit, I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you and my insides do a little dance when I see you’ve written. I think that qualifies this as something more than friendship. We’re really bad at playing it cool, aren’t we?

Send my best to Penny and everyone. And please, keep me posted on anything exciting in your world. You’re not the only one who enjoys someone who is passionate about their subject.

Your Girlfriend?

Hermione

* * *

**To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**Date:** October 23, 2018, 2:17 PM

**Subject:** Have you been living under a rock?

Hermione,

Rest assured, I have had my fill of cults and have no desire to ever sink back into something like that ever again. I know that the magical world obstinately cuts itself off from Muggle society, but I would have thought that Hamilton was big enough that someone like you who doesn’t have their head buried in the sand would be somewhat aware of it. I was trying to work in a nod to that (referencing popular culture is apparently another hip thing to do in letter writing, according to Penny), though I should have realized that we don’t necessarily share popular culture references. 

I must admit, I do like the idea of your son knowing about us on some level. Although I cringed at the word girlfriend. Given our history, it sounds rather...infantilizing. Womanfriend sounds a bit awkward. And partner sounds more committed than where we are at the moment. You are right that I don’t like to do things halfway, but I think I am alright without giving this a name as long as we both agree that it’s Something.

Everyone sends their love,

Severus

* * *

October 25, 2018

Rosie,

Yeah, Uncle Harry knows. I asked the same thing. Apparently they used to know this guy way back and it seems like they feel he’s trustworthy. I think she really likes him too. There’s a few things that Mum’s shared with me that she asked that I not put in a letter. I’m sorry to be a tease, but you’ll understand, given the circumstances. I’m sure she’ll tell you everything as soon as you can speak in person. I’m really sorry, Rosie.

I asked Uncle Harry about James when he stopped by last night. He gave me a whole lecture about how violence doesn’t solve problems and should be the last resort, but he looked a bit proud all the same. He also told me something hilarious about Mum that would sound horrible if taken out of context, remind me to tell you when you come home for the Christmas holiday. Though Scorpius might not find it so amusing because it has to do with his Dad being a prick, so maybe it’s best just to keep it in the family.

Glad you enjoyed the cookies. Can’t wait to talk to you in person again.

Love, Hugo

* * *

**To:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**From:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**Date:** October 27, 2018, 10:22 PM

**Subject:** Something

Dear Severus,

As lovely as it would be able to sum this up with something simple, I am glad that we’re on the same page. Now enough dissecting our relationship or we might just talk ourselves out of interest. And I for one would be displeased with that turn of events.

At the risk of violating my own rule on overthinking things, I have to admit that I’ve been really missing you a lot the past few days. I keep thinking of things to tell you, sometimes I have whole imagined conversations in my head. Then I just get sidetracked with silly little things like my job or parenting and by the time I sit down to write I lose it all. I really should try taking notes, with extra safeguards put in place of course. It’s strange, as much as I’ve always loved the written word, it doesn’t always seem to be able to capture everything I want to say. It adds a heightened level of drama that just seems to intimidate me. It’s not that I’m writing to you, it’s that I have to see my thoughts written out which makes it so much easier to scrutinize.

Anyways, I miss your voice, if that isn’t too creepy. 

Hermione

* * *

**To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**Date:** October 29, 2018, 9:34 AM

**Subject:** If that’s creepy I’m right there with you...

Dear Hermione,

I honestly don’t mind dissecting our relationship. I’ve frankly never gotten to do this internally, so it’s even better being able to get insight from someone who actually knows what they are talking about. 

I must confess that I’ve missed your voice as well. And watching you speak. Which also sounds creepy. I keep picturing you sitting down to write, trying to imagine the exact face you’re making as you write each line. It’s not nearly as sweet as the real thing.

I have a proposition for you. Penny’s taught me how to video chat, I don’t know if this is something you are able to do or if you would have any interest. I know that with the time difference it might be a bit more challenging than writing, but I thought it might be worth the effort. I miss hearing your voice as well. Funny how something I only really had a few days to get so attached to has become so important to me.

Let me know what you think.

Severus

* * *

November 3, 2018

Hugo,

I completely understand the necessity of being cryptic, but oh how aggravating it is! But my curiosity certainly comes second to protecting Mum. I’ll suffer until I see you next.

When you say like, do you mean,  _ like _ like? Or just like a really good friend? I’m not sure how I feel about her dating right now. This is so weird, isn’t it?”

I can’t believe there’s still over a month until Christmas. I am counting the days.

Love, Rosie

* * *

**To:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**From:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**Date:** November 5, 2018, 7:32 PM

**Subject:** Muggle technology for the win!

Dear Severus,

I’m fairly certain that this came across in our call, but I really enjoyed speaking with you. Was it just me or did it feel like picking up where we left off? So much more natural than this. Although obviously email still has its uses. 

Just wanted to let you know that I’ve officially marked you in on my schedule (don’t worry, it’s in code, so your cover is not at risk of being blown). So I should be available at the time we discussed unless there’s a crisis. I’ll do my best to give you advance notice, but apologize for any times I might not be able to do so.

I’m really excited about this, you have no idea.

Hermione

* * *

**To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**Date:** November 5, 2018, 2:40 PM

**Subject:** I do have some idea...

Dear Hermione,

I’m excited too. I’m glad our call went so well. I look forward to our next conversation. 

Severus

* * *

November 16, 2018

Rosie,

I really don’t know, but she’s smiling. All. The. Time. Well, not when she’s dealing with a work crisis, you know how she gets. But even then, she seems to brush it right off. And she’s talking to him a lot. She’s started video chatting with him. I kind of accidentally met him the other day when I didn’t realize she was on the computer. It was kind of awkward because none of us really were prepared for that, but he seemed nice. A bit older than I expected to be honest.

I guess it’s different for me, I don’t really remember when Mum and Dad were still a real couple the way you probably do. I don’t see why Mum can’t find someone who makes her as happy as Uncle Viktor makes Dad. I have no idea where this is headed, but wouldn’t it be nice if she wasn’t all alone when I joined you at school? I’m keeping an open mind unless I see reason to do otherwise. But I agree, this is weird. Maybe a good weird though?

I can’t wait for you to be home for Christmas. We have so much to talk about. 

Love, Hugo


	12. Chapter 11 - Unexpected Presents

Hermione kept glancing at the clock anxiously. She had desperately wanted to meet Rosie at Kings Cross but the last thing her daughter needed was any more attention than she’d already had to endure because of Rita Skeeter’s manufactured crisis. So she’d reluctantly agreed when Harry had offered to collect all the kids.

“Mum, that’s not going to make them get here any faster,” Hugo informed her matter of factly, as if he were the parent and she the child. 

“I know,” she sighed. “I just hate sitting around doing nothing.”

Hugo snorted. “I’d hardly call organizing the bookshelf ten times doing nothing.”

Hermione was saved having to come up with a witty retort by the sound of the door opening. She barely had time to take two steps before her daughter was barrelling into her, catching her in a bone crushing hug. Hermione returned the gesture in full measure, rocking their entwined bodies back and forth as she pressed a kiss to the top of her daughter’s hair.

“Mmm, my baby,” Hermione muttered, giving her another squeeze.

“I’m not a baby, Hugo’s the baby.”

“Hey!” Hugo called out indignantly from across the room. Hermione ignored him, knowing that there weren’t really any hurt feelings at play here.

“You’ll always be my baby,” Hermione informed Rose with one last kiss before her daughter pulled away. “Both of you,” she added, looking pointedly at Hugo, who scowled at her even as he accepted a hug from his sister. Grinning, Hermione turned to Harry, who was flanked by James and Al. “Thanks again.” she said to Harry before hugging each of her nephews.

“Not a problem at all,” Harry said warmly. “Ron asked me to tell you that he’ll be by later tonight. He was planning to come with me to Kings Cross but, apparently half the staff at the shop are out sick and this is a busy time for them.”

Hermione winced. “He’d better not get this lot sick. I can’t afford to be out of commission.”

Harry smirked. “Ron didn't say anything but I think it may have had something to do with an experiment gone wrong.”

Hermione frowned. “ I hope they're not up to anything illegal. I know George hasn't always had the best track record when it comes to thinking about the safety of test subjects.”

Harry shrugged his shoulders. “That's your department, not mine.”

“Alright, Mum,” Rosie started, rounding on her. “What's the deal with you and this mystery man?”

Harry raised his eyebrows at her. “I think I'd like to know the answer to that myself,” he replied, eyes twinkling with mirth. 

“Shouldn’t you be getting home to Ginny?” Hermione asked her friend pointedly. “I’m sure she can’t wait to see the boys.”

“Fair,” Harry conceded, kissing her on the cheek. “But don’t think you’ve gotten out of this conversation.” 

Hermione rolled her eyes. “I liked you better when you stayed out of my love life.”

Harry grinned. “Happy Christmas, Hermione. You’ll be at the Burrow tomorrow?”

“Of course,” Hermione replied, walking them to the door. 

Harry picked up a bag he’d left by the door and handed it to her. “I almost forgot, this came for you at work after you left. It’s been cleared.”

Brow furrowed, she peaked inside to see a cardboard box with Muggle postal marks. “What is it?” she asked, though her question was answered the second she saw the handwriting on the box.

Harry gave her a look of mock innocence. “I think that falls under the category of things you don’t want to discuss with me.” With a final wave, he led his sons outside, leaving her standing in the entryway for a moment, mind racing. But the package had to wait, even if her curiosity was burning.

When Hermione returned, she gestured for Hugo and Rose to join her on the couch. “Alright, Rosie. I know Hugo’s told you that I’ve been talking to someone I met on my trip a few months ago.”

Rosie crossed her arms firmly over her chest. Merlin, she looked like Ron at this moment. “That’s about all he’s told me,” she grumbled. 

“I didn’t tell him much more than that,” Hermione explained. “And I know you know why we couldn’t put it in writing. But I can tell you now. He’s actually someone I knew many years ago. His name is Severus.”

Rosie frowned, and Hermione could practically see the wheels turning behind her eyes. “Like the guy Al’s named for?”

Hermione bit her lip. “More like precisely the man Al is named for.”

Rosie looked at her in confusion. “Didn’t he die in the war? Wasn’t that the whole point of using his name?”

“That’s what everyone thought for a long time,” Hermione explained. “And most everyone outside of our family still thinks that. And for the time being, it’s imperative that it stays that way. He’s built a nice little life for himself, and I won’t be the reason that Rita Skeeter comes nosing around and ruins things for him.”

“Hugo says you’ve gotten close,” Rose said hesitantly. “Are you dating this guy? Isn’t he ancient?”

“I know you think I’m practically prehistoric but he’s not that old,” Hermione countered. 

“Didn’t he teach at Hogwarts while you were there?” Rose pressed. Hugo sat up straight; somehow he had missed that crucial fact. “Isn’t that weird?”

“He did,” Hermione conceded. “Don’t think this isn’t something we’ve discussed. But we didn’t fall for who we were back then. We’re both living in the moment.”

Rose looked at her skeptically. “You’ve fallen for each other? As in, in love?”

Hermione opened her mouth, but for a moment words didn’t come. “I think so,” she said at last. “We haven’t said as much, but I think I have and there is every indication that the feeling is mutual.”

Rosie sighed heavily. “I just want you to be happy, Mum,” she said finally. 

“We both do,” Hugo piped up.

“I know,” she said, pulling them both into a sideways hug. “And I promise, you still come first. No matter who I’m seeing, you’re my priority.”

Rosie rolled her eyes. “Unless the Ministry is realizing for the umpteenth time that it can’t function without you.”

Hermione shook her head. “Even then. You can’t get rid of me that easy.”

“So how does this work?” Rosie asked, turning to face Hermione, and for the briefest of moments the terror of having an impromptu sex talk flashed before her eyes. Thankfully, her daughter’s mind was much more innocent. “You met him on holiday, right? But no one here is supposed to know he’s alive. So I take it he’s still in America?”

“Yes,” Hermione replied.

“But you live here.”

“Right again.”

Rose raised an eyebrow, her eyes narrowing, and Hermione was struck in that moment just how much Rosie took after her grandmother. “Is that really what you want? Someone who’s an ocean away?”

Hermione sighed heavily, the worry that had been tugging at her heart for a few weeks now being pulled to the front of her mind by her daughter. “It’s not ideal,” Hermione conceded. “But he’s really established himself in America, he’s got obligations to consider. He’s happy there. And my life and my responsibilities are here. But we’ve both been through enough to know that you don’t turn your back on something wonderful just because it’s going to be a challenge. We’ve found ways to communicate and close the distance and so far it’s been working well.”

“Like video chatting,” Rose said carefully. 

“Exactly. The Muggle communication is far more secure, at least for our purposes.”

“I’d like to meet him,” Rose insisted, crossing her arms and looking at Hermione defiantly. “Hugo got to, I think I’m entitled.”

Hermione felt a flash of panic. They had discussed this, but she thought it would be something they planned, a structured meeting that could hopefully go off without a hitch.

“To be fair, I only sort of met him,” Hugo reminded her. “I don’t think an awkward hello really counts.”

“It’s more than I’ve got,” Rosie replied. “Can you call him?”

“Right now?” Hermione asked, trying not to let her anxiety show.

Rose shrugged. “No time like the present. Besides, if we put it off it will have to be after Christmas and I won’t be able to enjoy the holiday wondering about all of this.”

She had a point, Hermione conceded. “Alright. But with the time difference he might be at work right now.” 

Rose shrugged. “It’s worth a try.”

Steeling herself, Hermione ran up to her room and grabbed her computer. Before returning downstairs, she sent Severus a quick message, hoping against hope that he’d see it before the call went through. She shut the computer off to buy herself a few minutes. Taking her time, she made her way back downstairs and settled between her children. Hermione smiled brightly in the face of their impatience as the machine booted up. When she opened the video program, a little green dot inexplicably indicated that he was online. With some trepidation, Hermione hit the call button.

Severus answered within moments. He had to have gotten her message then, thank Merlin. His face smiled up at her from the screen. “Well hello,” he greeted, sounding like he was using his customer service voice. “To what do I owe this pleasure?” he asked, his tone telling her he knew exactly what this was about. And he didn’t want the kids to know that he knew. Her heart ached for him then, impossible futures flashing before her eyes before she pulled herself back to the here and now to respond.

“I have some people who would like to meet you,” she said softly, before setting the computer on the coffee table to widen the shot. “Severus, I’d like you to formally meet Hugo,” she put her hand on her son’s shoulder. “And meet my daughter Rosie.”

“Rose,” Rosie asserted. “Only family can call me Rosie.”

Severus nodded. “Noted, Rose,” he said in the most sincere voice she’d ever heard from him. “It’s wonderful to meet you both, your mother has told me a great deal about you.”

Rose sniffed loudly. “Funny how that works. She’s barely told us anything about you.”

“A mother’s prerogative,” Hermione warned.

“I’m happy to answer any questions you might have,” Severus said, his voice even and controlled. “These days I’m an open book.”

Hermione thought, all things considered, the conversation went extremely well. By the time they were ready to end the call, Rosie seemed to have thawed towards him the slightest bit, which seemed like progress.

“Oh, before I go,” Severus said. “Did you get my package?”

“Harry just dropped it off,” Hermione explained. “I hadn’t gotten a chance to look at it.”

“Do you mind grabbing it? There’s something in there for all of you and I must admit I would love the chance to see you open it.”

“Of course,” Hermione agreed, reaching over to grab the bag.

“I sent it to the Ministry since I realized I don’t actually know where you live.”

“It’s safer this way,” she explained, slitting the box open with her wand. “All my mail gets screened, and the less attention brought to my house the better.” Hugo snuggled closer to her, the memory of the rogue Howler still fresh all these months later. She gave him a quick squeeze before pulling the box open. Inside was a carefully packaged loaf of a sweetbread of some kind and three books.

“The cookies wouldn’t have traveled well,” Sevrrus explained. “But I hope that managed to survive the trip.”

“It looks amazing, thank you.”

Severus grinned sheepishly. “I know I don’t know the two of you well, but based on what your mother has told me about you, I thought that you might enjoy these books.”

“What do you say?” Hermione prompted as Hugo and Rose both looked over their presents. 

“Thank you!” Hugo chimed in, his attention focused on the book in his hand, his fingers delicately tracing the embossing. 

“Yeah, thanks,” Rose said far less enthusiastically, her expression neutral. 

“On that note,” Hermione said, grabbing the computer. “Kids, I’ll just be a minute then we can eat.” 

“It was nice to meet you,” Severus said with a small wave. The kids bid their goodbyes and Hermione quickly brought the computer upstairs. 

“I’m so sorry about that,” she apologized. “I didn’t mean to spring this on you like that.”

Severus shrugged, grinning at her more naturally. “Relax. To be honest, I was kind of expecting something like that to happen when Rose got back from school.”

Hermione sighed, placing the computer back in its usual spot on her desk. “I’m so sorry about her attitude, I don’t know what’s gotten into her.”

“She’s looking out for her mother.” Severus shook his head. “You weren’t kidding that she’s like you. If not for the hair I’d have thought time travel was involved.”

Hermione grinned. “She got all the best and worst of both Ron and me. Two of the most stubborn people on the planet had a kid, I guess we shouldn’t be surprised that she’s any different.”

“I hope I didn’t overstep with the present,” Severus said hesitantly. “I’m perfectly alright with them not liking me right away, but I desperately want them to come around eventually,” he admitted.

“It was sweet, though I wasn’t expecting it. I feel bad, I didn’t send you anything.”

Severus shook his head. “It wasn’t a quid pro quo. I just enjoy having people to give presents to.”

“Still, I’ll make it up to you, I promise.” Hermione glanced at the door. “I should be getting back.”

“Don’t worry, spend time with your children. I’ll still be here when Rose is back off to school.”

Hermione gave him a worried look. “I don’t think I want to wait that long before hearing from you again.”

“It doesn’t have to be. I just don’t want you to feel pressured to make time for me. I understand you have family obligations and the last thing I want to do is get in the way of them.”

Hermione desperately wanted to tell him to stop being silly, that he was starting to feel like family to her. That she wanted to make time to talk to him. Instead, she just nodded, hoping at least some of the emotions she was feeling came across with her smile. “Happy Christmas, Sev.”

Severus grinned. “You don’t know how good it is to hear someone say that properly.” Hermione couldn’t help but chuckle. “Happy Christmas, Hermione.”

* * *

January 1, 2019

Severus,

I know you said I didn’t have to get you anything, but since your birthday is also coming up, I thought you deserved to get some presents. As you can see, my knitting skills have come quite a long way. I hope you enjoy the scarf. I thought the green would go nicely with your coat. Also enclosed are some items from the joke shop that I thought you might find amusing, as well as a selection of Honeydukes chocolates. I wish I could make something as delicious as that chocolate courgette bread, but instead you’ll have to make do with this.

I do hope that you get this in time for your birthday. I’m sure we’ll talk before you get this, but I wanted this to be a nice surprise. I also realized that I really wanted you to know where I live (though please, let’s not make care packages a regular thing; I don’t think I could take the pressure).

Wishing you a very happy birthday. Wish I could be there to celebrate with you.

Hermione


	13. Chapter 12 - Family Ties

Severus grinned as Hermione’s face popped onto the screen. He could see the millisecond that she registered what he was wearing, her eyes lighting up with excitement. “You got it alright then!” she exclaimed, looking pleased.

“It’s perfect,” Severus told her. 

Hermione made a face. “It’s far from perfect.”

Severus shook his head. “Doesn’t matter. I love it.” He bit his tongue lest anything more damning slipped out.

Hermione smiled at him bashfully. “That’s very kind of you to say.” She looked over to something to the left of the camera’s view. “Speaking of presents...someone has something they’d like to talk to you about.”

“Oh?” Severus asked, confused but intrigued. Hugo shyly sidled into the picture, a tentative smile on his face.

“Thank you for the book you sent,” the boy began politely. “I just finished it a second time and I was wondering…”

Severus’ eyes widened. “Second time?”

Hermione arched an eyebrow at him. “He’s my son, are you really surprised?”

“Fair point,” he conceded, turning his attention back to the boy. “Continue.”

Hugo shifted awkwardly. “Well, sir…”

“There’s no need to call me sir,” Severus interrupted. He ignored Hermione’s snort, which she attempted to cover with a cough. “I’m not your teacher. Severus is fine.”

“Right,” Hugo said, looking awkward as his face flushed red. “Anyways, I thought the premise of the book was fascinating, but the process it outlined was incredibly flawed.”

“In what way?” Severus asked, pleased with the line of questioning.

“It makes the assumption that only magical plants would impact the outcome of the resulting potion, but that ignores the fact that many so-called magical plants are not inherently magical on their own and are frequently used by Muggles. Their magical properties are clearly only brought out when combined in specific ways with truly magical ingredients."

It took everything in him not to show just how pleased he was. He might have evolved from his teaching days, but why give the boy the upper hand? No matter how much he thought he knew, he had much to learn. Instead, he turned to Hermione. "He really is your son, isn't he?"

"Yep," Hermione said, grinning at the boy affectionately as she ruffled his hair.

"Mum…" Hugo groaned, looking suddenly self conscious.

"It's a compliment, I assure you," Severus added quickly. "Your mother was quite talented at potions herself."

"It wasn't my strongest subject, though," Hermione replied.

Severus arched an eyebrow. "And yet you successfully brewed the Polyjuice potion in your second year."

"You did?" Hugo asked, twisting around to look at his mother in awe

Hermione's jaw dropped. "How did you…?"

Severus gave her a dry look. "I knew the ingredients were missing from my private stores and that Potter was involved. Clearly he wasn't going to be the one brewing it."

"You stole from a teacher?" Hugo asked, looking a bit impressed. Ah, that must be Weasley's influence.

"And I was rewarded by being partially turned into a cat for a few weeks," Hermione retorted.

"Ah, humbris," Severus smirked. Hermione scowled at him, but there was no heat in her eyes.

"Anyways, I was going to suggest I leave you two to talk shop for a bit, bit if you're just going to fill my son's heads with a litany of all my rule breaking…"

"I'll behave," Severus promised.

Rolling her eyes, Hermione gave a little wave before she left the room. Hugo gave him a nervous smile.

“I know this must be weird for you,” Severus confessed, sensing that he had to take the lead. 

Hugo shrugged. “A bit.”

“I’d really like to get to know you better. And your sister, but given that she’s at school…” He shook his head; he needed to stay focused. “I want to be open with you. If you have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask.”

Hugo frowned thoroughly. “You were Mum’s teacher,” he said, a statement not a question.

“I was,” Severus acknowledged with a nod.

“Did you...like her back then?” Hugo asked nervously.

Despite himself, Severus snorted. “Merlin, no. Not in the way you are suggesting, and not even in a respectable professional capacity. She was insufferable.”

“Oh,” Hugo said, visibly relaxing. 

“I know it might be hard to believe,” Severus went on. “But that is the truth. There are many lines I have crossed in my life, some for better reasons than others. But never that one.”

“Good,” Hugo replied, sounding reassured. “Rosie will be happy to hear that. Though she might take more convincing to actually believe it.”

“I will do whatever it takes,” Severus assured him. “I don’t know what’s in store for your mother and myself. But I want to do whatever I can to make you and your sister comfortable.”

Hugo grinned. “Don’t worry, I’ll work on Rosie.”

“Let her get there in her own time,” Severus cautioned. “Now, what else did you want to ask me but were too afraid to?”

* * *

Severus couldn’t wipe the grin off his face as he made his way from his office back to the cafe. He hadn’t meant to talk to Hugo quite so long, but an hour had gone by before either had realized it. Severus had left the boy with a promise to resume their conversation the following day, and already he was lining up things he wanted to discuss, books he wanted to suggest. He was so absorbed in his thoughts that he nearly slammed into Penny, who avoided a collision only by doing an ungraceful piroet. 

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” Severus cried out, reaching out to steady her.

Penny frowned at him. “Where on earth were you going with your head stuck in the clouds like that?”

“I just got off a call.”

Penny wiggled her eyebrows at him. “I see.”

Severus waved her off, picking up a knife and starting to prep the vegetables for lunch. “Get your mind out of the gutter. I was actually on with her son.”

“Really?” Penny asked, sounding surprised. “That’s kind of a big step. Spending time with the kids.”

Severus shrugged, but inside he felt a warm glow that he wasn’t accustomed to feeling. “I suppose.”

“I take it that it went well?”

Severus nodded. “I’ve never met a child with whom I’ve had so much in common. I always thought I wasn’t good with kids, turns out there’s a few exceptions.”

“My daughter, for one,” Penny reminded him. “You are amazing with her.”

Severus shrugged. “She’s still young. Plenty of time to learn to hate me.”

Penny snorted. “Who could hate  _ you _ ?”

Severus smiled grimly. “You would be surprised.”

“Hey, listen,” Penny began, and something in her voice made him pause and look at her. “I just want you to know...if you need me to, I can handle things here.”

Severus furrowed his brow. “Pardon?”

“Things seem to be getting serious with you and Hermione,” she explained. “I’m not complaining. I’m thrilled, actually. It’s about time you found someone. But if you’re just sticking around here because of the shop, I don’t want you to worry about it, okay?”

Severus sighed. “Of all of the things keeping me on this side of the pond, the cafe is extremely low on the list.”

“So what, you’re just going to do long distance forever?”

Knowing that she meant well, he tried his best not to let his irritation show. “It’s working fine for us right now.”

“It can’t last forever, Sev,” Penny said quietly, putting a hand on his shoulder. “At some point you’ll both have to decide what is best for you. I just don’t want you to have to worry about this end of things, that’s all.”

“In the unlikely event of that happening, I would rest easy knowing that things were in your capable hands,” he conceded. “But the shop would be the easier thing to leave behind.”

“Airplanes exist for a reason,” Penny pressed. “I’ve always wanted to travel.”

Severus shook his head. “You are getting miles ahead of yourself.”

“Fine,” Penny conceded. “If you change your mind…”

“I know how to find you,” Severus replied dryly. “Oh, and Penny?” he added as she made her way back to the dining room. 

“Yeah?” she called back from the door.

“Thanks.”


	14. Chapter 13 - Almost Paradise

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter and the next are marked for explicit content. Enjoy! :D
> 
> The title of this chapter comes from the song [Almost Paradise](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kTUpjHyf-YI).

Severus looked at Hermione’s latest message again, his stomach churning anxiously. _Something’s come up, we need to talk,_ could refer to a number of things, none of which sounded very good to him. He’d been counting the hours until their scheduled call, but now that it was a minute away, he was dreading it.

That didn’t stop him, however, from racing to answer the incoming call as soon as it came through. “Hey there,” she greeted, bubbly and seemingly oblivious to his angst. 

“Hello,” he greeted, trying not to let his voice betray his emotions. He either must be getting rusty or Hermione was beginning to know him too well, because she frowned.

“Is everything alright?”

“Why wouldn’t it be?” he asked, trying to keep his tone light. “What did you want to discuss?”

Realization dawned on Hermione’s face before she slapped a hand to her forehead. “I’m so sorry, I was in a rush and I didn’t have more than a moment to write. It’s nothing bad, I promise.” She looked at him nervously. “Actually, I think it’s quite the opposite.”

“Oh?” Severus asked, feeling the tension leave his body as his curiosity was piqued. 

“I’ve been invited to speak at Ilvermorny,” she gushed excitedly. “I’ll have some meetings there as well.”

“Congratulations,” Severus said, meaning it, but not quite understanding. Ilvermorny was much closer than the UK, but it wasn’t all that close. And she knew by now that he would never go that close to a magical establishment, particularly when there would be extra scrutiny accompanying her visit. So she was unlikely to be extending an invitation for him to come hear her speak, though truthfully under different circumstances he would have jumped at the chance.

“I’ve managed to condense the whole trip into two days,” Hermione continued to explain. “Which means I have a few days to play with that are free for me to do whatever I wish.”

Now, this was something to get excited about. “Indeed?” he asked, trying to sound cool and indifferent and this time not caring that she could see right through his posturing. 

“I was thinking, if you’re not too busy...I could come for a visit?”

There was so much Severus wanted to say, he wanted to laugh he wanted to do a most undignified happy dance. Instead, he gave her a soft smile and said, “I would love that.”

She looked at him hesitantly. “There’s only one small problem. I did a little research and it seems that the bed and breakfast I went to last time is all booked up for those days. And it seems like most of the hotels in the area are as well.”

“What’s the date?” Severus asked, nodding when she said it was in May. “Between graduations and reunions, this is a busy time around here.”

Hermione looked worried. “If I’ll be a distraction-”

“Don’t you even dare suggest changing your plans.” Severus took a deep breath. “You could always stay with me. You can absolutely say no if that makes you uncomfortable, and I have plenty of extra space for you to have your own room…”

“Sev?” Hermione asked, cutting him off. 

“Yes?”

“I would love to stay with you,” she said, smiling at him with amusement. “You’re cute when you’re flustered.”

Severus pursed his lips. “Is that why you keep making comments like that?”

Hermione grinned at him wickedly and his heart did somersaults. “Maybe.” She shook her head. “I’ll give you the details of my trip in the next few days, I don’t know how long I’ll get to stay, but I want to make the most of it.”

“I’d like that,” Severus replied, wondering how this had become his life.

* * *

Hermione felt like her skin was on fire. Sensation flared under his touch, which seemed to reach everywhere all at once except for where she most needed him to. She moaned, aching with a desire she feared would consume her. With a chuckle, Severus smirked at her, his hands growing infuriatingly still.

“My, are we eager,” he crooned, eyes glittering with amusement as she writhed underneath him, desperate for release.

“Severus,” she groaned, looking pleadingly into his eyes.

“Hmm,” he murmured, moving his lips right above hers. His breath smelled like mint and chocolate, like he’d just finished a cookie. She wanted to eat him up. “I suppose you _have_ been good.” His hand snaked down, nestling between her legs as he whispered. “Ten points to Gryffindor.” His kiss began as his hand finally gave her what she had been wanting all along.

With a gasp, Hermione woke, shuddering her release with his name on her lips. It took her a moment to get her bearings, to realize where she was. The fuzzy warmth of her orgasm was quickly replaced by the understanding that she was in fact alone in her bedroom, an ocean physically between her and Severus. Her bed felt incredibly empty, particularly as her body was still humming from the after effects of his imagined touch. 

Eyes bleary and heart still racing, Hermione reached for her phone, hand patting the table fruitlessly in the dark before finally grasping the device. Wincing at the harshness of the screen’s light, Hermione pulled up Severus’ contact information and dialed before she could think anything of it.

The phone only rang twice before he picked up, sounding a bit frantic. “Hermione? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she replied, suddenly feeling a bit foolish. “I just needed to hear your voice.”

Severus exhaled loud enough for her to hear. “You’re sure that’s all?” Severus demanded. “It’s the middle of the night, isn’t it?”

“I had a dream,” she explained.

“A nightmare?” he asked. Hermione could almost hear the frown in his voice.

Hermione bit her lip. “Quite the opposite, in fact.”

“Oh?”

“You and I were together.”

“Oh.”

“Intimately.”

Hermione heard his breath hitch. “ _Oh_.”

“Yeah,” she replied. “I’m sorry if I frightened you, I just...I really wish you could be holding me right now.”

“A few more weeks,” he assured her, though there was a definite hint of desperation in his voice.

“I know,” she sighed, resigned. 

“Can you get to your computer?”

Hermione’s eyes widened in surprise. “Are you suggesting what I think you’re suggesting?”

“I just thought that rather than racking up an astronomical international phone bill we could video chat like we usually do. What were you thinking?” He sounded so innocent and she didn’t have the energy to walk him through it.

“I look a mess,” she complained. “Need I remind you that I just woke up?”

“You’re always beautiful to me,” Severus said softly. Hermione felt her face flush.

“You’ve been warned,” she countered, trying not to sound too flustered.

Hermione had turned her bedside lamp to low, giving off just enough light to allow her to be partially visible. Her laptop was perched on the nightstand, angled so just her head and shoulders were visible. It felt a little silly to be so self conscious when not even ten minutes ago her subconscious had been quite content with Severus seeing _everything_. But that hadn’t been real, and in reality they just weren’t at the point where she really wanted him to see her in her nightgown. Out of it, on the other hand, was another matter entirely.

The computer emitted a series of digital beeps and bloops as the call came in, and she quickly accepted. After an initial delay, Severus’ face burst onto her screen, and for just a moment if she squinted just so, it almost looked like he was actually in the room with her. A pang deep in her chest reminded her otherwise. 

“That’s better,” Severus said, smiling softly as he leaned closer to the camera. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Hermione said, unable to keep a grin off of her face. 

“So, I hear you’re dreaming about me?” he asked, smirking. He was looking at her exactly how he did in the dream.

“Is that weird?” Hermione asked. 

Severus shook his head. “Tell me about it.”

Hermione blushed furiously. “There wasn’t much to tell really.” Or at least, anything she felt comfortable uttering aloud. It seemed weird to discuss such things when they had only been physical for less than a week months ago.

Severus arched an eyebrow at her. “Hermione, just because I’m a virgin doesn’t mean I’m a prude.”

Unable to hold back a snort, Hermione felt the tension in her shoulders suddenly release. She was overthinking this, as usual. “I just don’t know how to put it into words.”

“Was I any good?” he asked, a hint of eagerness in his voice. 

Hermione considered teasing him, but decided that would be cruel. “Most definitely.” 

Severus looked at her anxiously. “I can only hope that I can live up to your subconscious' expectations.”

Hermione smiled nervously, forcing herself not to look away. “You’ve thought about it?”

“Of course I have,” he said, the words rushing out as if they couldn’t escape his lips fast enough. “More than I thought was appropriate, given the circumstances.”

“I think it’s safe to say that I don’t mind, considering,” Hermione countered.

“Noted,” Severus said, his face relaxing ever so slightly. “Are you sure you can’t tell me anything? I could use all the pointers I can get.”

“Well,” Hermione said, thinking past the memories of heat and emotion trying to grasp anything concrete. “I think you awarded me points.”

She should have expected it, but the hardening of his face and the panic flashing in his eyes before he shut down still took her by surprise. “I would never, I hope you know...when I said more than was appropriate I didn’t mean before last fall…”

“I know, I know,” Hermione assured him. “I’ve never doubted your sincerity about when your interest began.”

Severus sighed heavily. “Still…”

“We’re good, Sev. I promise. I don’t know, I think it actually did something for me,” she added, wiggling her eyebrows. Severus scowled in reply. 

“I’m sorry, but that is one fantasy I will be unable to indulge,” he said, an edge still to his voice.

“I understand completely,” Hermione assured him. “But I’m not worried. There will be plenty of other things to try.” He visibly began to relax again and Hermione felt relieved. She looked longingly into the camera. “I wish we didn’t have to wait.”

Severus looked back at her nervously. “We could, you know, do what I think you thought that I was suggesting this call be.”

Hermione looked at him skeptically. “Is that really what you want our first time to be like?” she asked.

“No,” he admitted, looking a little relieved. “Though I must admit I am tempted.”

Hermione shook her head. “As lovely as it would undoubtedly be, I honestly don’t think that I could bear feeling that close to you emotionally when you’re so distant physically. That’s how we got here in the first place.”

“True,” Severus conceded. 

Hermione glanced at the clock and groaned. “I have to be up in three hours and I’m wide awake.”

Severus winced. “I’m sorry for keeping you up, I can let you go…”

Hermione shook her head. “If I wasn’t talking to you I’d have been laying here stewing.” She hesitated. “Would you stay? Unless I’m keeping you from something.”

“But you need sleep,” Severus began before letting his sentence drift off. “One moment.” He ducked away from the screen for a moment, leaving Hermione to speculate what the thumps and shuffles were. He reemerged holding a leatherbound book triumphantly. “I’ll read you to sleep.” He paused, looking at her hesitantly. “Unless that’s too forward a presumption.”

Hermione grinned so hard her face began to ach. “Would you believe me if I told you that you would be fulfilling one of my oldest fantasies? I’ve always found reading quite sexy.”

Severus snorted. “Why am I not surprised?”

Hermione beamed. “Because you know me so well. And it takes one book nerd to recognize another.” She gave him what she hoped was a suggestive look. “Perhaps one day I can return the favor.”

Taking a moment to settle in and turn off the light, Hermione turned the screen down to the lowest setting and turned to face Severus’ shadowy glowing face. “All set whenever you are.”

“Alright,” he confirmed. “Sleep well.”

“You too, when it’s time.”

Severus smirked. “Oh, I think I’ll be sleeping quite well tonight,” he replied, punctuating his words with an honest to goodness wink.

Hermione arched an eyebrow at him. “You’re supposed to be helping me sleep, not putting mental images into my head that will make that almost certainly impossible.”

Severus grinned sheepishly, though he didn’t look a bit chastened. “My apologies.” With a final smirk, he picked up the book and began to read. Hermione closed her eyes as his rich baritone washed over her, his voice wrapping her in a loving embrace. Before long, she was drifting into a warm, contented sleep, oblivious to just how long it took for Severus to be able to tear himself away once she drifted off


	15. Chapter 14 - Coming Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Second warning for explicit content! Enjoy!

Severus could barely focus all morning. He knew that Hermione wasn’t due until dinnertime, but he couldn’t help but look up each time the bell above the door jingled. Penny grinned at him knowingly the third time she caught him doing it, but thankfully she had the good sense to keep her thoughts to herself.

Right as the lunch rush was winding down, Severus handed a customer his change as the door chimed once again. He was so focused on the transaction that he didn’t bother to check the door this time. 

“Hermione!” Penny called out cheerfully. Severus jerked in surprise, turning quickly. She stood just inside the door, the streaming sunlight illuminating her with a radiant glow. Beaming, she pushed a pair of round sunglasses onto the top of her head, her curls tamed in elegant braids wrapping around the back of her head. Severus didn’t know if it was the unexpectedness or the fact that she was once again here in person, but the stunning sight took his breath away.

“Hi, Penny,” Hermione greeted before facing Severus, her smile softening into something more tender that he couldn’t help but return. “Hello.”

Severus walked over, suddenly unsure of what to do. “I thought you had meetings all day.” He hoped he didn’t sound like he was annoyed that she showed up ahead of schedule.

Hermione nodded. “One of them got rescheduled earlier yesterday and the other ended up not being necessary. I finished all the work I came here to do, so I figured I’d take advantage of the extra time. Since I have to leave so soon.”

Something twisted in Severus’ chest at the thought of letting her walk out that door in two days. “That sounds excellent.”

They stood in a slightly awkward silence for a few moments, both unable to look away from the other. Severus knew what he wanted, but the getting from what was in his heart and his mind to acting on it was beyond his expertise. Penny cleared her throat loudly, making him jump. He scowled at her. 

Unfazed, Penny gave him a significant look. “Go on, I’ve got things covered here.”

Nodding, Severus untied his apron and hung it on the hook.

“You’ll be coming over for dinner tomorrow?” Penny asked Hermione excitedly, before casting a worried glance over at Severus. “He did ask you, right?”

“I’m looking forward to spending time with your family,” Hermione answered graciously. “We only met briefly last time but I’ve heard so much about all of you that I feel like I know you already.”

“Interesting,” Penny said, smirking at him. “Who knew our Severus was such a chatterbox.”

Ignoring her teasing, Severus turned to Hermione. “I, er...have something for you in the back room.” Penny snorted. 

“Good to see you again, Penny,” Hermione said before following him towards the office. 

“I better not see either of you until tomorrow night!” Penny called out gleefully.

“Sorry about her,” Severus muttered, fumbling with the keys to his office.

Hermione laughed, the sound soft and musical. “It’s sweet. I like that you have someone who can talk to you like that without suffering your wrath.” She slipped her hand into his, the small connection sending sparks down his spine. He glanced over his shoulder and she was right there. So close and smiling up at him. She smelled of something vaguely floral and the overwhelming sense of her really being here struck him like a speeding train. Forgetting the door, he turned to face her, his mouth catching hers in a tender embrace. It felt like coming home.

“I wanted to give you a proper welcome,” Severus explained, pulling just far enough back to speak. “But I suppose that I have performance anxiety,” he added, jingling his keys. Hermione snorted and pulled him back into another kiss.

* * *

Eventually they made their way into Severus’ office, though unlocking the door proved difficult to accomplish while their mouths were glued together. Once they were in the privacy of the office, Hermione wrapped her arms around his back, pulling him closer, reveling in the closeness of his body. It was so much better than her memories, than her daydreams. She let her hands travel down to his hips, kissing him deeply as she guided his hips towards her. Not demanding, merely giving him a suggestion, an invitation to cross that bridge if he wanted. Involuntarily it seemed, his hips bucked forward, pressing his arousal into her leg. A moan escaped from him before he lept back as if burned.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t…” he babbled, turning a blotchy red the more flustered he got, looking a bit like a deer in the headlights.

Hermione reached up a hand to cup his cheek, to reassure him. “Hey,” she whispered soothingly, stroking his face with her thumb. “I’m not complaining.”

Nodding, Severus took a tentative step towards her. Hermione kissed him gently, tenderly, letting him get his sea legs back. He seemed more relaxed now, less on his guard. She kissed him until he began to kiss her back with the kind of force she’d been holding back but was more than happy to return. This time he pulled her close and Hermione began to forget about everything else because kissing Severus like this was magical. It had been nice that week they’d had together in the fall. But they had been practically strangers at the time. These were kisses between two people who knew each other intimately and she ached with desire for more. They made their way over towards the desk, leaning against the edge for a little support. Hermione was struck with an overwhelming desire to sweep everything off the table and let him take her right here and there. But Severus deserved more than that for their first time. His first time. The thought made her shiver and cling to his shoulders.

Reluctantly, they pulled back, breathing heavily, foreheads pressed together. “I’d give you top marks,” she sighed, causing him to snort with breathless laughter. 

“It’s amazing, being able to touch you,” Severus said, his voice a low whisper as he tucked an errant curl behind her ear. He winced. “That didn’t come out right.”

“I know what you meant,” Hermione assured him quietly. “I feel the same way. Although…” Hermione slipped their hands together. “I would be interested in that innuendo. If you are.”

Severus buried his head against her shoulder, his groan shuddering through her body. “How are you real?” his muffled voice asked.

“Funny,” Hermione said, desperately fighting the urge to screw everything and take him right here after all. “I was wondering the same thing.”

“Want to get out of here?” Severus asked, taking a step back though not dropping their entwined hands.

Hermione grinned, feeling giddy. “I thought you’d never ask.”

* * *

Somehow, they managed to get to his house despite being utterly absorbed in each other. And he had been unable to resist stealing a kiss or two along the way. Leading up to today, he had been nervous that perhaps what they shared had been built up in his head all this time, that he was seeing what he wanted to see. But the emotions and sensations rushing through him were real, and he didn’t need Legilimency to tell him that Hermione felt the same way. It was exhilarating. 

Once they were safely past the threshold, Severus pulled Hermione close, relishing in their proximity for a moment before pulling her into the kind of kiss that was much more suitable for the privacy of his home. Hermione sank into him, a contented little sigh escaping her lips. 

Suddenly, something shifted. Hermione pressed gently against his chest and he reluctantly pulled back. 

“What’s wrong?” Severus asked anxiously. “I didn’t hurt you, did I?” Leave it to him to screw this up before it even got started. 

“Goodness, no,” Hermione assured him, cupping his face in her hands. “Quite the opposite, actually. I just…” She looked him deeply in the eyes. “I need to know, before we go any further. That you’re ready for this, that this isn’t just because there is a limited timeframe and you want to get it over with.” Her words rushed out of her mouth as if of their own volition. 

“I’ve had a lot of time to think about this, Hermione,” Severus said urgently. “I know what I want. If you want the same thing.”

In reply, Hermione pressed her lips firmly against him in a fierce kiss. “You have no idea how much,” she exhaled, sounding pleased and something else that made his stomach do somersaults. 

They made their way up the stairs. Severus’ heart was pounding in his ears, and he almost felt dizzy with anticipation. He’d never felt a rush like this, he’d never felt so much rightness in making a decision. Every sense was heightened and every touch of her hand on him sent bolts of electricity through his soul. He was just starting to lose himself in the heady feeling when he felt her hands take ahold of the light airy material around his neck. Freezing, Severus grabbed at her wrist, stepping back a little.

“Hey,” Hermione’s voice cut through the panic ringing in his ears. “Talk to me.”

Severus chuckled in self deprecation. “Somehow I forgot that sex generally requires taking off clothes.”

Hermione looked at him with a mixture of kindness and pity that made his heart sink. “I don’t care what you look like, Sev. I’m under no delusions about what happens to the human body as we age. I’m not expecting you to be a ripped quidditch player. I’m attracted to you whatever your physique may look like.”

Severus smiled at her wryly. “That’s kind of you to say. But that’s not what I was concerned about.”

“Then what?” Hermione asked, frowning. 

Severus hesitated. “As you well know, scars caused by dark magic never truly heal.”

Hermione’s eyes grew wide with understanding. “The bite.”

Nodding, Severus stared at her foot, which somehow had lost it’s shoe and sock. “It’s hideous.”

“No, it’s not,” Hermione whispered, closing the space between them again, hand resting once more on the scarf. “It’s a sign you survived. Corpses don’t have scars, Sev. Only the living.” Without another word, she pulled him towards her, kissing him fiercely. Dimly, he registered her hands moving, tugging the scarf away, letting it fall to the floor. Her mouth moved from his lips down his chin until finally tracing the lines that he knew by heart, the ones he confronted every day in the mirror. Her tongue flicked against his skin and he moaned, sounding a bit desperate. He felt her smile against his neck. “Better?” she whispered, sounding triumphant. 

“Much,” Severus said with a strangled gasp. 

“Let me take care of you,” Hermione crooned, her hand ghosting over the front of his pants. His hips bucked forward on their own accord and Hermione laughed, sounding pleased by his enthusiasm. “I’ll take that as a yes?”

In reply, Severus led her to the bed, trying to struggle out of his pants on the way. Hermione’s hands on his hips stilled his motion, and thoughts of just how close they were to where he really wanted them made him feel like he was going to explode. “Careful, now,” she warned, her hands moving to unbutton his pants and help him undress. It should have felt humiliating, but instead it made him feel as if his body were on fire. 

They lost their clothes more quickly after that. Severus didn’t have time to feel self conscious with Hermione exploring every inch of him. He felt a little guilty, he really wanted this to be nice for her as well, and right now all he could do was lay there in a quivering pile of desire and let her have her way with him. 

Severus closed his eyes for just a moment, not wanting to miss a second but needing to memorize this. To absorb her gentle touch, to remember every twitch of his muscles in reply. He wanted to stay here like this forever, just the two of them. This thing, Severus found, was incredibly simple after all. With reason stripped aside, his heart was laid bare and for the first time in his life, the prospect didn’t scare him.

“Hey,” Hermione whispered, his eyes fluttering open as she brushed his cheek. “You alright?”

Severus managed a weak smile. “Never better.”

* * *

The first thing Severus felt upon waking was a warm contented feeling that was entirely foriegn to him. The second was that he wasn’t alone in his bed. Panic swept over him as he registered his lack of clothing, feeling incredibly vulnerable in his half awake state. Then the person next to him shifted, sighing sleepily as they snuggled closer, bare skin pressing against his own, and the spell broke. Memory came rushing back to him and he managed to relax into Hermione’s embrace. 

At least as much as his protesting muscles would allow. They hadn’t been particularly rambunctious, at least in his estimation, yet he seemed to have used muscles he didn’t know he had. The rest of his body didn’t seem to care; he was already feeling it respond to the memory, to her touch, eager for another sip of the formerly forbidden fruit. Needing a distraction, he focused on Hermione’s sleeping form, marveling at the sensation of cuddling. She felt so real here in his arms that it was almost overwhelming. Severus winced. Perhaps this wasn’t the best distraction.

Placing a soft kiss to Hermione’s temple, Severus attempted to extract himself without waking her. He figured he could take care of himself in the shower; it wasn’t as if he wasn’t already accustomed to being self sufficient. But Hermione clung to him, stirring slowly as she began to wake. “Morning,” she whispered sleepily, a blissed out look on her face as she turned to look up at him. “Where’re you going?”

Severus felt his face heat. “Er…”

Hermione’s eyes glanced down, smirking as she noticed his arousal making itself known through the covers. “Don’t tell me you’ve started without me.”

Severus winced. “I’m sorry, I…” He didn’t get any further; Hermione cut him off with a fierce kiss, clearly not bothered that they both had just woken up. Her hand scooted down to grasp him and he gasped into her mouth before jerking away. “I don’t want this just to be about me,” he managed to say, his ability to form coherent sentences slipping away from him with every stroke of her hand. His hips bucked towards her, his body having different priorities than his heart. 

“Believe me,” Hermione said, a wicked grin on her face. “I am quite enjoying myself.” She stopped her ministrations, instead slowly running her hand up the front of his stomach and chest until finally resting on his heart. “You have no idea how gorgeous you look when you come undone. And I’m the one doing that. It’s incredibly gratifying, you know. And hot.” She shrugged, snuggling back up to him. “It’s been a while since I’ve been able to do this.”

Severus leaned down and pressed a soft kiss to her forehead. “Then it’s been a long time since someone could do for you what you’ve done for me.” It should seem odd, talking about Weasley while all he could think about was how much he wanted to touch her everywhere. But he let the thought drift away. Nothing could ruin this, not now after they’d come so far. “I want to know what you like. I want to know how to make you happy.”

Hermione caressed his face tenderly. “Just be you,” she said softly.

Severus scowled, but there was no heat to it. “You know what I mean.”

Hermione grinned cheekily up at him. “Yes, just like that.”

Severus huffed. “Honestly, Hermione, I’m trying to be sincere here.”

“I know, I’m sorry,” she replied, looking adequately contrite. “Alright then. Give me your hand.” Wordlessly, he obliged, letting her guide it towards her as she shifted onto her side, hooking her leg around his torso, coming excruciatingly close to the part of his body he was trying so desperately to ignore. She led his fingers between her legs, rubbing them against a hard nub. “Right here,” she whispered, her mouth inches from his ear as she thrust her hips forward, begging for motion. Tentatively, Severus moved his fingers and Hermione hummed approvingly as he explored. 

“Is this all?” he asked, noticing that she looked perfectly content even though it didn’t seem to him like much. “You’d tell me if I was doing something wrong?”

“For now, this is everything,” she breathed, inching her leg down. He couldn’t help meeting it with a thrust of his own. Laughing, Hermione reached down and matched his rhythm. It didn’t take long, then, with them moving as if one. He had been ready for ages and far too soon he was shuddering with his release. At first he tried to fight it, not wanting his pleasure to interfere with Hermione’s. But she didn’t relent, giving him a reassuring squeeze before he let himself sink into the wave of sensation. 

Once he came back to himself, he sheepishly looked over to Hermione. “Sorry.”

Hermione shook her head, not needing his apology. There was a wild look in her eyes that made his body protest with a desire he physically couldn’t handle quite so soon. “Kiss me,” she demanded. Severus moved towards her mouth when she placed a hand on his sticky chest. “Not there,” she amended, glancing down as she lay down on her back, legs spread wide.

_ Oh _ . 

Heart pounding in his ears, Severus moved down the bed, settling comfortably between her legs. Hermione wrapped her legs around his shoulders, pulling herself closer. “What do I do?” Severus asked desperately, feeling a surge of panic at the unknown.

“Kiss me,” Hermione repeated, thrusting her hips up. Taking a deep breath, Severus complied, losing himself in her taste, in the sounds she made as she approached her climax, the way she shuddered under his tongue as she let go, her hand tangled in his hair almost painfully.

Severus extracted himself enough so he could resume his spot next to her, cradling her in his arms. “How did I do?”

“E,” Hermione breathed. 

Severus frowned. “E?”

“Exceeds expectations. There’s always room for improvement. Although,” she said, grinning lazily up at him. “Keep that up and there will be plenty of O’s in your future.”

Snorting, Severus placed a kiss on the top of her head. “I’ll bear that in mind.”

Hermione sighed happily. “I wish we could stay like this forever.”

Reality reared its ugly head at her words. Severus resolutely pushed them aside. Not yet. Not now. “Let’s just focus on the present,” Severus said, stroking her back.

Hermione wrinkled her nose. “And in the present moment, we’re filthy.” She kissed him again on the mouth, taking her time and making his every nerve ending wake up once again. “I don’t suppose you could help me clean up.”

Severus raised an eyebrow. “If you are implying what I think you are, I don’t think that counts and getting clean.”

Hermione shrugged. “And yet I’m finding that I don’t really care.” She slid off the bed, tugging his discarded sweater over her head before reaching out a hand to him. “Coming?”

Severus heaved himself up and took it. “Give me enough time and I will be.”


	16. Chapter 15 - Despite All Logic and Reason

Hermione knew that there was only so much she could extend their time together. Thankfully she had been able to secure the portkey for her return before she’d finished her official duties, so she didn’t have to allow for extra time to pick it up. But the portkey would be going back whether she was using it or not, and short of a crisis, it would be virtually impossible for her to ask for a replacement without some level of embarrassment. As much as she wanted to stay, her feelings weren’t worth risking an international incident.

It was so much different than last time. Then she’d had something else requiring her undivided attention, no matter how sad she had been to cut her trip short. Then she had only seen potential, hadn’t had months of increasing closeness, hadn’t had two days of what some people had the privilege to share for a lifetime. Now...now all she could think about was what she was leaving behind.

“I’m sorry I can’t stay longer,” she sighed, snuggling closer to Severus on the sofa. “I would love nothing more than to stay like this forever.” 

When he didn’t reply, Hermione glanced up at him. Severus’ face was once again unreadable. Hermione wondered desperately what he was thinking. He must be feeling a similar cocktail of emotions as she was if he was schooling his features so much. She hated that their parting made him put his walls back up, the thought of him closing his feelings off from her made her heart ache. 

“Hey,” she said softly, touching his smooth, freshly shaven cheek. “Talk to me.”

Severus shook himself, as if coming out of a trance. “I didn’t mean to withdraw,” he apologized. “Far be it for me to waste a second we have together.” He sighed heavily, the sound echoing cavernously in his chest where Hermione’s ear was pressed. “I didn’t realize this would be so...challenging.”

“Hmm,” Hermione hummed in agreement, squeezing him reassuringly. 

“I’ve been so focused on the prospect of your arrival that I didn’t spare a thought for your departure.”

“It’s easier to focus on the positives.”

Severus huffed a small, amused laugh. “Perhaps, though I am not personally accustomed to it.” He pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head. 

Hermione grinned. “That is probably an adjustment.”

“One I have been making for twenty years in one way or another, and yet I’m still not used to it. Some habits are harder to unlearn.”

Hermione bit her lip, giving voice to the nagging worry at the back of her mind. “Should I not have come?”

“ _ No _ ,” Severus replied emphatically, underscoring his objection to the suggestion by kissing her deeply. “Quite the contrary,” he said as they parted, both breathing a bit heavy. “Your visit has been illuminating.”

“How so?” Hermione asked, her voice breathless from more than just the kiss. 

“For one thing, it reassured me once again that our affection was mutual, that it wasn’t all in my head. Or that we had made it out to be something that it was not.” 

Hermione smiled softly. “Without question,” she confirmed, as if it were even necessary at this point.

Severus shifted so he could look her directly in the eyes, his gaze boring into her soul. It didn’t feel like an invasion; rather as if he were revealing himself to her with no holds barred. Despite all of their clothing optional activities of the past forty-eight hours, this moment felt like the most intimate they had exchanged. “I also came to the terrifying conclusion that I’ve fallen in love with you.”

“Oh,  _ Severus _ .” His words shouldn’t have shocked her. He had told her in every touch, in every look since she arrived. Even if she hadn’t acknowledged it at the time, she had felt it and it had warmed her heart.

Looking suddenly self conscious, Severus focused his gaze down somewhere around her collarbone. “You don’t have to say anything. I understand that we both entered this...association in different circumstances. I would be loath to assume that your kindness means anything more than what you have expressed. I just couldn’t let you leave without telling you, because I don’t know if I could have had the nerve to do so once you had gone.”

Hermione placed a finger under his chin, tilting his head back up to face her again. His eyes flashed with nervousness, the slightest glimmer of hope dancing in them. If she hadn’t already known what her reply would be, the tumble of emotion elicited in her by that look told her everything she needed to know. “I would tell you to assume away, but as I don’t want there to be any room for confusion, I’ll be as plain as possible. It’s the last thing I ever expected, but despite all logic and reason, it just so happens that I’ve fallen in love with you too.”

“Really?” Severus asked, an almost childlike eagerness flooding his face.

“One-hundred percent,” Hermione said firmly.

After his initial burst of excitement, Severus seemed to realize something, his face falling. “So what happens now?”

Hermione sighed heavily. “I wish I knew. Nothing has changed, really.”

Severus arched an eyebrow at her. “I’d say that everything’s changed.”

Hermione smiled sadly. “Yet your life is here and my life is there and never to two shall meet. Like I said, despite all logic.”

Severus scowled, though it wasn’t directed at her. “Of course this has to be complicated.”

“Love always is,” Hermione reminded him softly. “People make long distance relationships work all the time. We even managed it without trying.”

“I don’t want to hold you back,” Severus said, his voice soft and fragile. “It hardly seems fair to continue, with no promise of a future time when we might be together.”

Hermione shook her head. “Just because our present situation doesn’t allow for that doesn’t mean it can’t change. I won’t be Minister forever. There’s always a need for ambassadors, I could likely secure an appointment in Boston.”

“But you are seeking a second term,” Severus reminded her. “That’s five years at least, since there’s no way you can’t secure it, even with those trying to take you down.” He took her hand in his own. “To be clear, this isn’t me asking you to quit the campaign,” he added hastily. “It’s just that five years is a long time.” He winced. “I don’t feel it when I’m with you, but I am older, Hermione. At my age…”

“People die at any age, Severus,” Hermione cut him off. “You of all people know that.” His hand reached up, resting unconsciously on his neck where his scars lurked below layers of fabric. She shook her head. “I don’t have an answer for you. I don’t know how we’ll make this work. But I do know that ending this for practicality’s sake would be more unbearable than any prolonged separation.” She cupped his face in her hands. “I haven’t felt this happy in a long time, Sev. You make me happy, whether we’re together physically or not. We can make this work. I want to make this work.”

Severus looked conflicted, torn between acquiescence and self destruction. “Are you sure?”

Wordlessly, Hermione pulled him into a tight embrace, trying to put every ounce of feeling into her kiss. He melted under her fingers, and for just a moment it felt like nothing could separate them. Just then, a chime dinged from her bag. She pulled back suddenly, feeling panicked. “The portkey!” she gasped, mentally chiding herself for losing track of time. 

“How much time?” Severus asked.

“Just a minute, said Hermione, grabbing her bag and the portkey.

“Then we have at least thirty seconds.” He kissed her again and she was overcome with an urge to resign the moment she got back just so she could come right back here. But her delusions were shattered as the portkey began to glow blue and she regretfully extracted herself from Severus, not wanting to accidentally bring him back with her. That would lead to all sorts of unpleasant questions. 

“I’ll call as soon as I am able,” she assured him, fighting to hold back the tears that suddenly threatened to fall. She didn’t want him to see her cry, not over this.”

“I look forward to it,” Severus replied, sounding uncharacteristically choked up. 

The portkey warmed under her touch. “I love you,” she said hastily, needing to say the words before it was too late.

Severus smirked at her, trying to play it cool but his eyes twinkling playfully gave him away. “Likewise.”

Before Hermione could tell if he had meant to say anything more, she felt a tug behind her navel and she was flying back to her regular life.

* * *

**To:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**From:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**Date:** May 24, 2019, 6:22 AM

**Subject:** Miss You

Severus,

I could hardly sleep last night. Normally I would attribute it to the time change, but in this case I’m fairly certain that it was primarily because I couldn’t stop thinking of you. About everything we said to each other. About how empty the bed felt without you in it.

I’ve been pouring over my schedule to see when I might be able to come visit again. Unfortunately with the campaign I’m booked solid until the fall. Regardless of the outcome, I want to try and do as much as I can in the next few months. Either it will set up my agenda for the next five years or it will be my last hurrah. 

I won’t ask you to come here; that is far too large a request for me to make. But until the election I just have too much up in the air for international travel, no matter how desperately I wish it was otherwise. I hope you can understand.

All my love,

Hermione

* * *

**To:** hgranger@yahoo.co.uk

**From:** sprince@witchesbrew.com

**Date:** May 24, 2019, 12:40 PM

**Subject:** Re: Miss You

Hermione,

I know what you mean. I also couldn’t sleep, and I didn’t even have travel to blame it on. I hope this isn’t too forward, but my sheets still smelled like you and it was intoxicating. I know I will have to wash them at some point, but for now I want to hold on to this little tangible reminder of what we are for just a bit longer. 

Don’t apologize about your schedule. Truthfully, I suspected as much. And I would hate to do anything that would jeopardize your chances of success. Like you said before we parted; we can make this work. And I firmly believe we can, even if it does have to be at a distance for the time being.

I appreciate your discretion about my potential return. Trust me when I say I have also considered that course of action. I may be a coward for it, but I am just not ready. That being said, if anyone could entice me to face it all again, it would be you. It really isn’t fair to expect you to always make the trip here just for us to spend time together. I’ll get there. I just need more time.

Until then, I look forward to our continued correspondence and calls in the months ahead. Perhaps we can find ways to feel close despite our physical distance. 

Lovingly yours,

Severus


	17. Chapter 16 - The Prince Revealed

Penny wiped her hands on her apron as she turned to face the next customer. It was an older woman, maybe in her sixties, with impeccable curled blonde hair that was fooling absolutely nobody and glittering pointed catseye glasses. The woman’s shockingly red lips grinned at her in a way that Penny supposed was intended to be friendly, but instantly put her on edge. However, she was a professional and would not let her true feelings be known. “What can I get for you today?” she asked in her most pleasant customer service voice.

“Hmm, so many options!” the woman proclaimed in a self-important voice tinged with a British accent. “Quite charming,” she added, though her tone belied her true opinion.

“Yes, quite,” Penny agreed, eyeing the growing line behind the woman. “Would you like any recommendations?” 

The woman frowned thoughtfully. “Why yes, what would the owner recommend? We go way back, you see.”

Penny highly doubted that Severus would have ever willingly spent any time in the presence of a woman so transparently fake. “I see. Well, this is always a favorite,” pulling out the most expensive fruit tart they served. She didn’t generally upsell too much, and the cafe did well enough that she rarely had to. But her initial unease was only growing, so she didn’t feel particularly charitable at the moment. Besides, a higher price item might entice her to use a credit card and Penny might at least be able to get a name.

“Delightful!” the woman proclaimed. “And how is dear old Severus? Is he around by any chance,” the woman continued, practically standing on her tiptoes as she craned her head to try and look around Penny into the back. Thank goodness Severus was out making deliveries. 

“Sorry, no,” Penny said simply, refusing to elaborate. “If you’d like to leave your contact information, I’d be happy to pass a message along.”

The woman waved a hand dismissively before rummaging in her purse. Something green flashed quickly before she pulled out a twenty dollar bill. “No matter, I was only passing through.” She handed Penny the money and Penny handed her the tart, but the woman continued to linger. “This place has quite the distinctive name, any idea what inspired it?”

“I’m sorry, ma’am, I just work here.” Now, that was a bold faced lie, but Penny didn’t care. This woman was clogging up the line while being entirely too nosy for her liking. 

“Of course, of course,” the woman muttered, looking at Penny thoughtfully. “How well do you know the owner?”

“As well as anyone knows their boss,” Penny replied flatly. “Now if you don’t mind…” Penny nodded in the direction of the line, which now nearly reached out the door.

“Oh, silly me!” the woman explained. “Carry on.”

Penny did her best to keep an eye on the woman while also helping Paula get back on track serving customers, but the unnerving customer managed to slip out unnoticed into the bright September day during the second rush.

* * *

“Hey, can we talk for a sec?” Penny asked the moment Severus returned from his rounds. He enjoyed helping with deliveries from time to time, it helped him stay connected to his best customers. And they seemed to always order a little extra something right after he visited. Who would have ever thought that people would actually get excited by the prospect if his visit? It was good business and a good boost for his ego to boot.

“Of course,” he replied, relishing the cool air conditioning. It was promising to be a hot day despite the fact that it was the first week of September, and he was grateful he had been talked into adding the unit when he opened. He started towards a table but Penny turned and headed into the back. Frowning, he followed her. This had to be serious. Or at least sensitive. “What’s wrong?” he asked, shutting the door of his office behind him.

Penny chewed her lip anxiously, arms crossed tightly over her chest. “That’s the thing, I’m not entirely sure if anything’s wrong. It’s just a feeling.”

Severus looked at her closely. Penny wasn’t one to fret; if something was making her this worked up, he took notice. “You have good instincts. Tell me about it and we can figure whatever this is out.”

Penny took a deep steadying breath. “This woman came in this morning, she said she knew you from way back when. Was asking a lot of questions.”

Severus froze. Even after Hermione found him, he still wasn’t prepared for the prospect of running into his past. Particularly since most anyone else wouldn’t have been quite so understanding or well intentioned. “Oh? What did she look like?”

Penny looked thoughtful, eyes focused on something not in the room with them. “Probably roughly your age, maybe a little older? Though she clearly was trying to hide it. Blonde hair, shiny glasses, bright red lipstick. Very thin. Made my skin crawl.”

“Fuck,” Severus spat, walking over to his chair and sinking into it, burying his face in his hands.

“I take it you know who I’m talking about, then,” Penny said, a hint of amusement clawing its way through her obvious concern. 

“Unfortunately,” Severus replied, wincing. “What did you tell her?”

“I kept it vague,” Penny assured him, and he suddenly felt a surge of affection for his young friend. “Like I said, I had a feeling.” She looked at him for a moment before asking. “Who is she?”

“A reporter,” Severus sighed, sitting back in his seat in resignation. “Her name is Rita Skeeter.”

Penny frowned. “Why does that name sound so familiar?”

This was it, Severus realized. The moment where the artificial line he’d drawn between his past and present had to, by necessity, be erased. He’d known this day would come every since Hermione walked into his life, but he’d been a coward. And a fool to think that he could continue as if nothing had changed after he was located by the Minister of Magic. “It’s complicated.” He shook his head. “There’s something you should know, things I should have told you years ago. But I don’t want to get into it here. How is it out there? Can you get away for a bit?”

Penny sighed regretfully. “Glen’s out sick and I couldn’t get anyone to cover his shift. Originally I was going to see if you’d be around, but I’m guessing you don’t want to chance an encounter with this woman.”

Severus chuckled darkly. “You’d guess correctly. I’ll be heading home for the rest of the day. But I’ll see if I can find someone to help out in the cafe.”

Penny smiled gratefully. “You’re a lifesaver.”

Severus sighed. “In this lifetime, perhaps.” He ignored Penny’s questioning look. “If she comes back, don’t give her any information. And tell the rest of the staff if you wouldn’t mind?”

“She said she was just passing through.”

Severus snorted. “I highly doubt that. She is nothing if not persistent.” He returned his attention to Penny. “When you’re done here, come to my place for dinner? I don’t want to put this off any longer.”

Penny nodded. “Sure, I’ll call Ace to bring over Emma-”

“No,” Severus insisted firmly. “As much as you know I adore both of them, this needs to just be the two of us. I don’t think I can manage it otherwise.”

“Okay…” Penny said slowly, looking a little worried. “Whatever it is, it can’t be  _ that _ bad.”

Severus smiled wanly at her naivete. “I think you’ll have to be the judge of that.”

* * *

Much earlier than he expected, Severus jumped to answer the knock on his door. “You’re early,” he said as he let Penny inside.

She shrugged. “I was intrigued. And things slowed down enough for me to scoot out early.” She lifted a six pack of hard cider. “And it gave me enough time to pick this up.” Severus arched an eyebrow. “I know, I know, you don’t usually drink. But the way you were going on earlier I might need this.”

“Cider is...acceptable.” Not drinking much was a habit born of necessity. He couldn’t risk being drunk with so many lives on the line. He could hold his wine well enough if he only had a glass, and butterbeer of course wasn’t anywhere near potent enough to be a risk. But anything more than that was too dangerous during the time in his life where he might have acquired a taste for it. Even now, when he technically could have let his guard down a bit, he had little interest. He didn’t drink his feelings and he didn’t drink socially, so what was the point?

Penny grinned. “That’s why I didn’t try anything harder.”

“I was still working on dinner,” Severus explained, leading her towards the kitchen and sticking the cider in the fridge. “Do you mind waiting?”

“For food? No. But you need to start talking. Now.”

Severus gestured to the seats around the island, taking his own seat. “I agree. This is long overdue.” He took a deep breath, his mind racing with all of the possible ways to do this. “Do you know those books you like?”

Penny snorted. “Come on, Sev, you need to be more specific.”

“You know, the one with the TERFy author that you and all your friends felt so betrayed by?”

Penny frowned, looking at him cautiously. “Yes…?”

“That world...it’s real. All of it. Well, mostly, some of those books are embellished a bit, but the essential facts are there. And I lived through all of that.”

Penny’s mouth opened, looking shocked. Severus didn’t blame her; she probably thought he was going senile. “Excuse me?”

“I know it sounds mad…” Severus sighed, rubbing at his temple. He was going about this all wrong. He needed to get to the point. “What was the name of the sixth book?”

“Half-Blood…” Penny’s eyes widened, looking right at him. “ _ Oh. _ ”

“I had already established my new life when that came out. I could only hope that no one made the connection.”

“Or make light of it to anyone who did,” replied Penny, who had found the coincidence hilarious.

Severus sighed. “I regret that I didn’t know you well enough back then to feel I could tell you the truth.”

Penny’s eyes went wide. “That makes you the ugly asshole potions teacher.”

Severus winced. “Guilty.”

Penny looked at him appraisingly. “Either she really embellished those parts or you’ve grown a lot in the time I’ve known you.”

Severus looked at her with regret. “Unfortunately, those are some of the most accurate sections.” Nodding, Penny seemed to be absorbing everything in. “You’re taking this a lot better than I expected.”

Penny shrugged, a sheepish grin on her face. “Sev, I grew up wishing that world was real, that I could escape all my troubles and learn magic and find love.”

“It doesn’t quite work like that,” Severus said ruefully. “Magic is only appealing to those who don’t know what it is to wield it.”

“I get that, as an adult. But the part of me that those books spoke to during some of the toughest times in my life is kind of freaking out right now.” She brightened, an excited look coming to her eyes. “If it’s real, that means it really isn’t  _ her _ world then.”

“Unfortunately there are people with an inexplicable blindness to their own bias and hypocrisy in all worlds,” Severus said sadly. “I regret that for a long time, I was among their number.”

Penny shook her head, raising a hand to cut him off. “Wait, he, I mean, you, died in the books. So you’ve been in hiding all this time?” Penny asked. Severus nodded. “Is there like, a warrant for your arrest? Is that even how all that works?”

Severus shook his head. “I was posthumously cleared, apparently. But I wanted a fresh start. I did my duty and I needed to get away from all of that for my own sanity.”

“Understandable,” Penny agreed. “But how did you manage? With the books so popular?”

Severus smiled. “You’d be surprised at how much you can get away with when you have my particular skill set. But those books. It was the biggest breach of the Statute of Secrecy since it was enacted. Still, the government was in shambles at the time and no one could prove who leaked it. Though from what Hermione’s told me since, there was a lot of speculation that it was Skeeter, perhaps working with the Muggle author to make sure that the Muggle bits were authentic. No one could ever prove it, though, and since the whole world, save apparently you of course, believed it to be a work of fiction, people let it be. Enough had been altered so that there was no real danger of anyone stumbling on anything important. A few minor security adjustments had to be made. There were more pressing matters at that stage of the game.”

“Holy shit,” Penny whispered, looking shell shocked. “This is a lot to process.”

“I understand,” Severus insisted. “And of course I recognize that this by necessity alters our relationship.”

Penny frowned, looking at him in confusion. “Hold up, what?”

Severus sighed in resignation. He was going to have to spell it all out for her. “You can’t possibly be unchanged in your feelings knowing what you now know that you know about me.”

Penny narrowed her eyes at him. “How about we let me decide how I feel, alright?”

“But-”

“Listen, Sev,” Penny said, reaching over to take one of his hands in hers. Instinct told him to pull away to isolate himself. That was how he survived. He ignored it. “Yes, I suppose things are different. But more in the sense that a lot of things about you suddenly make sense. You’re still the same person in my eyes.”

Severus shook his head. “But I haven’t always been the person you see.”

Penny looked annoyed, but nodded in acknowledgement. “Look, you say that the books give an accurate depiction of you. Fine, I’ll accept that. But you aren’t that person anymore. You’ve worked so hard. I’ve seen it with my own eyes. You’ve changed just in the time we’ve known each other, and by far for the better. And that’s what matters to me.”

Blinking back tears, Severus nodded. “I appreciate your kindness.”

“Hey, stop that,” Penny admonished. “You stood by me when everyone else in my life turned their back on me. It would be hypocritical of me not to act in kind.”

Severus sighed heavily. “Yet there are many who I failed. And I have no one to blame but myself.”

“And I’m sorry they got to miss out on something I benefited so much from. But I will forever be grateful that you were in the right place at the right time to help catch me when I was falling. I wouldn’t have my family if it weren’t for you.” With that, Penny was out of her seat and next to him in a flash, enveloping him in a tight hug. “I love you, Sev. We all do.”

Overwhelmed, Severus returned the gesture. “I feel like you’ll yell at me if I say I don’t deserve it.”

Penny laughed, the sound loud but pleasant in his ear. “Smart man.” She pulled back, looking excited. “Wait...is Hermione the buck toothed book nerd?”

Severus snorted. “Loosely. That’s actually one of the strongest arguments for Skeeter being the author, it’s well known that she and Hermione have an ongoing feud and her portrayals of that character are much more critical and inventive than most everything else.”

Penny put a hand on his arm. “Wait. Is  _ Cursed Child _ canon? Or, uh, real?”

“That’s even more fiction than most everything else. Except for a few minor details. Like Potter’s unfortunate choice of names. And Hermione says that her nephew is actually in Gryffindor with Scorpius Malfoy. Apparently someone thought switching that around would appeal more to a Muggle audience.”

Penny’s eyes grew wide. “Wait, you said she worked in government...is she the fucking Minister of Magic?”

Severus raised his eyebrows. “Expletive aside, yes.”

“Next time she visits, I need to steal her away for like, an hour, just to talk about all this,” Penny gushed. “Just giving you notice now.”

Severus smiled. “I think she would be happy to oblige.”

Penny took both of his hands in hers, swinging them a little between them as she gave them a little squeeze. “Thank you for trusting me with all this.”

“Thank you for taking it all so well.” He hesitated. “I would appreciate it if you kept this between us.” Penny opened her mouth to protest, but Severus kept speaking, knowing what she was about to say. “Talking to Ace doesn’t count.” Penny shut her mouth. “I’ve worked hard to put space between that life and this one, and I’d hate to draw unnecessary attention to myself,” he explained.

“Of course,” Penny assured him. “But Severus...if you’re dating the Minister of Magic, and there is a reporter out looking for you...how much longer do you think you can keep them seperate?” 

Severus shook his head, sighing. “I’ve been asking myself the same thing.”

* * *

Severus emerged from his office after several hours of battling through paperwork and following up on purchase orders. He needed a break to rest his eyes. More importantly, he needed coffee. And a change of scenery. It was one of those kind of days. He’d just about stepped into the cafe proper to grab a cup when Penny practically bowled him over, pinning him against the wall. 

“What on earth?” Severus sputtered, the wind slightly knocked out of him.

“She’s here, Sev,” Penny panted, releasing him and taking a step back. “That reporter.”

Severus felt the bottom drop out of his stomach. “Fuck,” he spat under his breath, his heart pounding. It wasn’t like he hadn’t been expecting something like this. He’d just been hoping that he was wrong.

“What should we do?” Penny asked, looking at him worriedly. 

Severus ran a hand anxiously through his hair. “Serve her like any other customer.”

Penny rolled her eyes. “Duh. But she’s lingering. And bugging the staff about you.”

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Severus nodded. “Naturally.”

“I can handle this,” Penny assured him. “Just tell me how I can help.”

Severus gave her a wan, grateful smile. “I know you can. And thank you. Tell everyone to send her to you, they shouldn’t have to put up with it. You shouldn’t have to either.”

Penny shrugged. “I don’t mind, really. She’ll go away eventually.”

Severus sighed heavily. “Unfortunately, I think not. And I’m certainly not about to become a recluse on her account.” He shook his head, unsuccessfully trying to clear it. “I’ll come up with something.”

Penny clapped him on the shoulder. “Anything I can do. Might want to stay back here until she goes, I’ll let you know when the coast is clear.”

“Thank you,” Severus said softly.

“Anytime,” Penny replied with a wave as she rushed off towards the front of the house. 

Severus shut himself back in his office, head swirling. He had always had a contingency plan for this, if someone had gotten too close. He was going to disappear, start over somewhere else. But that had been his plan before he became invested in this town, before he’d built himself a family and made real, if not many, true friends. He hadn’t even given it much thought once he had begun getting invested in Penny’s future, had started putting down real roots for the first time in his life. Really, Hermione’s arrival should have triggered it, should have at least made him revisit his escape plan. Yet her stumbling upon him hadn’t given him the paralyzing feeling of fear he was experiencing now. He hadn’t run away then because he wanted to share this world with her, not hide it.

That was the crux of it, Severus suddenly realized. He was so, so tired of hiding. There was so much he was uncertain of, but that was one thing he could cling to. He also knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he did not want his life here exposed, particularly by Rita Skeeter. He had chosen to share this life with Hermione, and if the bubble he’d built for himself was bursting, he wanted to be the one to do it. She’d taught him that it wasn’t as scary as he’d once thought.

Severus found his thoughts crystallizing into sudden clearness. Months of agonizing and wishing for something to change finally came to a head. He realized, with a jolt, that things were changing, whether he liked it or not. So why not take the plunge and do it on his own terms, do it in a way that would actually let him have it all?

Mind made up, Severus picked up a pen and furiously started scribbling a list. When Penny gave the all clear, he wanted to be ready to leave as quickly as possible.


	18. Chapter 17 - Paradise Is You

Severus approached the battered telephone booth hesitantly. He was surprised the visitor’s entrance was the same; he’d have thought that they would have had to come up with some other disguise in the age of cell phones. He patted the charm around his neck, praying that it would work in such a high concentration of people. His skills hadn’t been put to the test like this in ages. Taking a deep, steadying breath, Severus stepped inside and entered the code. 

The smooth female voice was the same as it ever was as it greeted him. “Welcome to the Ministry of Magic. Please state your name and business.”

“Severus Snape, to see the Minister of Magic.”

He took the badge that was deposited for him, pinning it to his robes with shaking hands. He hoped the charm would be enough to get him past the wand check. The idea of being stopped at the door before he could get to see Hermione hadn’t occurred to him when he’d jumped on the first flight to London that he could afford. He really should have tried to contact her first, but his near miss with Rita Skeeter had him on edge about the security of their communications. 

Stepping out of the lift as it came to a halt, Severus walked slowly towards the wand check. He didn’t want to move too quickly, to draw any unneeded attention to himself. He even queued up in line, despite the spike in anxiety it caused him. When it was his turn, the attendant looked at him for half a heartbeat before his eyes slid past and on to the next visitor. With a sigh of relief, he made his way into the main lift, which was blessedly empty, and punched the button for the Minister’s office. 

Heart pounding in anticipation, Severus fought to retain his composure. He was here. He was doing this. There was no backing out now.

* * *

Hermione froze at the sound of Maggie’s raised voice. It wasn’t often that she heard it, but typically it meant that someone was trying to force their way into her office. Usually that meant someone from the minority faction of the Wizemgamot who found little ways to chip away at her authority whenever they got the chance. An opportunity which she rarely gave them. Drawing her wand just to be safe, she inched towards the door, pressing herself up against the wall so she could assess the situation.

“I’m sorry, sir,” Maggie’s voice called out clearly. “No one is allowed to see the Minister without an appointment.”

“I just need to talk to her,” a familiar voice said desperately. “It’s important. It’s about her security.” Relief and confusion flooded Hermione as she moved to open the door.

“The only issue with the Minister’s security right now is you,” Maggie said tersely. 

“Stand down, Maggie,” Hermione admonished calmly as she stepped out of her office. Inexplicably, Severus was standing there, right in front of her secretary’s desk in the Ministry of Magic, looking uncharacteristically frazzled. “This is my friend Severus.”

Maggie flushed, looking embarrassed. “My apologies, Minister,” she replied. “Sir,” she added, with an infinitesimal bob in Severus’ direction. 

Hermione gave her a reassuring smile. “Already forgotten. You know how much I appreciate how you look out for me.”

“Yes, well,” Maggie said distractedly, not meeting her gaze. 

Hermione turned to Severus. She could talk to Maggie more later; right now curiosity burned at her, wondering what on earth would compel him to show up like this. “Severus, please, come in.” He quickly obliged.

“I thought she was going to curse me for a moment there,” he said with a shaky laugh as Hermione shut the door behind him. “I didn’t mean to cause any trouble.”

“We’ve had some problems in the past with men who think they know best and can’t take no for an answer. I can’t blame her for jumping to conclusions.” She looked at his neck carefully. “Wearing the charm I presume?”

Severus shrugged. “I thought it would be wise.”

“Probably was,” Hermione said with a sigh before turning to face him, arms crossed firmly over her chest. “Enough chit chat. What are you doing here, Severus?” She hoped her question didn’t come out the wrong way. She just never envisioned him ever returning to the country, let alone showing up unannounced to her office in the heart of the Wizarding world.

“I probably should have thought this through a little more,” Severus admitted, rubbing the back of his neck distractedly. “It all happened so fast.”

“ _ What _ happened?” Hermione demanded, letting a little of her authoritative work voice slip in. 

“Rita Skeeter tracked me down.” Hermione let out a large breath that she didn’t realize she’d been holding. That was not what she was expecting. Before her mind raced into triage mode, she couldn’t help but feel a flash of disappointment that his sudden arrival had nothing to do directly with their relationship. Concern for her security, while thoughtful, was nowhere as romantic as the impassioned declaration she had so often found herself fantasizing about lately.

“Start from the beginning.”

Severus sighed heavily. “A few days ago, Penny told me someone was poking around asking questions about me. From her description I figured out who it was, I decided to do my best to avoid her and hope she moved on. But yesterday she was back and this time she mentioned you. Penny stopped me going out just in time, but I knew that she somehow had made the connection between us.” He shook his head in frustration. “I think she somehow got the information from the birthday present I sent you.”

“Damn,” Hermione sighed. “We’ve suspected a leak for ages, but this…”

“I know,” Severus responded solemnly.

“So you came here to tell me in person?”

Severus nodded. “I had no way of knowing if our other communications have been compromised.”

Hermione blanched, the tender words they’d exchanged for months dancing through her head. “I’ll look into that.” She frowned. “But charm aside, weren’t you afraid of being seen?”

Severus looked her directly in the eyes, holding her gaze with a ferocity she’d never seen in his more mature and mellow self. 

“I don’t want to be your dirty little secret, Hermione,” Severus said earnestly. “I don’t want to be the gossip that Skeeter woman can weaponize against you.” He shook his head. “Hiding made sense for a long time. It doesn’t anymore.”

Excitement bubbled inside Hermione’s chest at his words, swirling possibilities almost making her dizzy. Perhaps her daydreams would come true after all. She grabbed at the back of the chair in front of her desk to steady herself. “I see,” she said, her voice sounding much calmer to her ears than she felt.

“I’ve had a lot of time to think this past year. To think about what I wanted, what I really wanted,” he continued, looking nervous. “It’s a luxury I haven’t had until recently. And until last autumn I would have said that I had everything I needed. That I was content. And I love the life I’ve built for myself. But for all the good in it, there’s been something missing, something I’d resigned myself to never having. I’ve never loved the way that I love you, Hermione. I know we’ve been stuck in this holding pattern where it seemed like circumstances were immovable. But I’ve come to the realization that there’s quite a lot that I would be willing to give up for the privilege of being with you.”

“Oh, Severus,” Hermione sighed, not knowing what to say as he bared his soul to her. 

“I’ve been looking for a place called paradise. But I realized that the happiest moments of my life were not because of where I was, but when I was around people whom I loved, and who loved me right back, warts and all.” Severus took her hands in his. “Hermione Granger, you are my paradise. I’ve realized that I could be happy anywhere as long as I have you by my side. I’ve been running away my entire life, but I want to finally come home.”

“Severus...is this a proposal?” she asked tentatively, not sure which answer she wanted more.

Panic flickered across his face for a moment before he collected himself. “That wasn’t my intent,” he explained, and her heart sank despite herself. “But it can if you want it to be.” She wasn’t sure what to say, even if the thought of a proposal made her insides wriggle pleasantly.

Before Hermione could answer, Maggie knocked on the door. Hermione started, heart sinking as she glanced at the clock. “Come in,” Hermione said in resignation.

Maggie poked her head into the room. “Your eleven-o’clock is here.”

“Tell them I just need a minute to wrap up in here and I’ll meet them in the conference room,” Hermione replied, looking around for her notes. She had to focus, regardless of the emotional freefall she was currently experiencing. 

“I’ll have your materials ready and waiting for you at my desk when you are ready.”

“Thank you, Maggie,” Hermione replied gratefully. “I’ll be right there.”

Severus winced. “I shouldn’t have just shown up like this.”

Hermione shook her head. “I’m glad you did. You have no idea how glad. I’ve just been trying to set up this meeting for literally months and I can’t afford for anything to go wrong today.”

Severus took a step towards the door. “I’ll see myself out, then.”

“Wait!” Hermione called out. Pulling a piece of parchment towards her, Hermione picked up her quill and scribbled a hasty note. “If you’re up for it, I know that Harry would love to see you.” She handed him the parchment. “This will get you in to see him. You don’t have to, but it would give you something to do while you wait.”

Severus smiled tightly. “I knew I’d have to face him sooner or later. Might as well be sooner.”

“I also want him to know about what you told me. Rita might just have slipped up, and if she has I want Harry on it sooner than later. Which I may have mentioned in that note.”

Severus relaxed into a playful smirk. “Then I will be happy to lend my assistance.”

“Thank you,” Hermione replied before reaching into her desk, pulling out a key that warmed to her touch. She walked over and placed it into Severus’ free hand, pressing it between their palms until it flared hot for a second before cooling, resuming it’s disguise as a normal key. “When you’re finished, wait for me at home. I don’t have much scheduled after this, maybe we could share a late lunch?”

“I’d like that,” Severus said softly. 

“Do you think you’re up for Aparating?” Hermione asked?

Severus nodded. “I’ve, er...been practicing. My body had reacclimated. There will be no issue.”

“Good,” Hermione said, relieved. “As long as you have the key, you’ll get there okay. It will let you bypass the wards. It only works for anyone I explicitly give it to. I gave them to my parents, it was a lifesaver when the kids were young. I keep a spare just in case.”

Severus removed the charm from his neck and slipped the key onto the cord. “How fortuitous.” 

“We’ll talk soon, I promise,” she told him firmly, gripping his arm to emphasize her words. She desperately wanted to kiss him, but she couldn’t afford to lose herself in the moment the way that she undoubtedly would want to do. As a compromise, she placed a soft kiss to his cheek before leading him to the door.

* * *

Severus towed over the desk of the wizard he presumed was Potter’s secretary. “I wish to speak with the Head Auror.”

The young man, who looked like he was fresh out of Hogwarts, his bright blue hair underscoring his youth, glanced at him, bored. “Do you have an appointment?”

Severus handed him the paper Hermione gave him. “This is from the Minister.” The boy straightened up quickly at the words, snatching the paper and quickly scanning it, his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. He glanced at Severus with more interest before rising. “One moment, please.” The boy knocked on the door to Potter’s office. “Uh, Harry? I think you need to come out here.”

Observing him skeptically, Severus shook his head. Naturally Potter wouldn’t be much for rules and formality, but this kind of casual unprofessionalism seemed beyond what one would expect. It certainly seemed like something Hermione would only tolerate if they also produced results. Which, to be fair, they probably did. This was, of course, the one subject area Potter had any brains for. Severus shook himself, hating that he was falling back into old habits so easily. He would have to be on guard for that. It wouldn’t do to rekindle a feud with his partner’s best friend, no matter the history there. 

Before he could get even more lost in his mental wanderings, the door opened and there stood Potter. He’d seen a few pictures that Hermione shared, but it was still unreal seeing him grown when for so many years it was doubtful he would ever make it to age twenty. He looked less like his father now; James Potter remained eternally in his mind his teenage tormentor, maybe the painfully young man who he’d seen in photos of Lily. James Potter never had laugh lines begin to form around his mouth, carved lovingly from a contented life. Somehow, it made them both more distinct in his mind, easier to differentiate. Despite himself, Severus found a lump forming in his throat. Potter’s eyes widened as they met his, then he unexpectedly grinned. “Thanks, Teddy, I’ll take it from here,” he said to the boy, taking the envelope that Hermione had included with the note. He nodded to the inside of the room. “Come on in,” he said, addressing Severus.

“Teddy?” Severus asked as the door closed behind him. “As in…”

“My godson, yes,” Potter finished for him, indicating that Severus should take a seat. “He’s filling in for a little bit for my usual assistant who’s on paternity leave.”

Severus felt his mouth quick in spite of himself. “Lest anyone accuse you of nepotism.”

Potter snorted. “Oh, it’s entirely nepotism. But finding someone I trust who is satisfied with only a few months of work is a lot harder than one might think. Anyway,” he continued, waving the subject away with his hand. “It’s good to finally see you. Although, I must say this isn’t exactly how I pictured it.”

“Nor did I,” Severus agreed. “An urgent matter necessitated that I speak to Hermione in person. She suggested I see you while she takes care of some meetings.”

Potter frowned. “What sort of matter?”

Severus nodded to the envelope that Potter had set on the desk. “That should explain everything.” Potter ripped open the parchment, his frown becoming more pronounced the further he read, until he swore under his breath. “Is that to your satisfaction?” Severus asked, unable to entirely keep the mocking amusement from his voice.

“We’ve finally got something that just might stick,” Potter said, leaping to his feet faster that anyone his age had any right to be doing. “Can you hang on here for a bit? I want to get the ball rolling on this.”

Severus shrugged. “I don’t have anywhere better to be.”

With a nod, Potter was out the door in a flash. Severus barely had time to look around the room and see much more than the portraits of Potter’s family when the man himself returned more quickly than he had anticipated. “I might get called away soon, but I should have some time to talk,” Potter informed him, panting a little as he took his seat. “I’ve been wanting to for a while now.” There wasn’t a reprimand in his tone, but Severus couldn’t help but feel one all the same.

“Thank you for respecting my wishes in that regard. I’d made my peace with what happened, with what you knew. But having to face all of that again, to face you...now that was a different matter.”

“I get it,” Potter assured him. “And for the record…I’m glad you got a chance at a better life. From everything Hermione’s told me, you’ve really run with it.” He hesitated, looking Severus straight in the eyes. “I think my mum would be proud.”

Severus sighed, Potter’s words affecting him more than he wanted them too. “If only I hadn’t given her so many reasons to be disappointed.” 

“You knew her better than I,” Potter said carefully. “But if she’s anything like everyone says she was, she would have been pleased that you found some peace.”

“I’d like to think you’d be right.”

Potter fixed him with a stare. “Speaking of which. Hermione.”

Severus’ stomach twisted in knots. He felt a sneer instinctively come to his defense. “What, are you about to tell me I’m not allowed to be involved with your  _ grown _ best friend?”

Rolling his eyes, Potter shook his head. “You and I both know perfectly well that no one can tell Hermione what to do. But you’re right. She is one of my best friends. And I’m always going to look out for her.”

Severus pressed his lips into a thin line. “There’s no need for you to protect Hermione from me.”

Potter arched his eyebrows. “I never said I did. Look, do I still think this whole thing,” he gestured in Severus’ general direction. “Is a little odd? Of course I do. But I’ve also seen Hermione looking happier this past year than she’s done in a long time. And she’s gotten to know you, gotten to form her own opinion outside of our shared history. I haven’t. Yet.” He paused. “I’d like to, though. If you’re going to be a part of Hermione’s life, I owe it to everyone to make an effort.”

Startled, Severus gave him a mild look of surprise. “That’s...quite generous of you. Considering.”

Potter shrugged, grinning. “You did save my life a few times, that’s got to count for something.”

“Finally you get that,” Severus snarked, eliciting a hearty laugh from Potter.

“It’s a lot easier to be appreciative when I have all the facts.”

Just then, Teddy poked his head into the office. “Sorry to interrupt, but Bishop is here for you, Harry.”

Potter nodded, all mirth draining from his face as he switched back into work mode. “Thanks, Teddy,” he said, dismissing his nephew. 

Standing, Severus said, “I’ll leave you to it.”

“Thanks for stopping in,” Harry said, shaking Severus’ hand firmly before picking up a quill. “It was good to see you.” Severus turned to leave when Potter called out. “Hey, Snape?”

Fighting the urge to lecture Potter about calling him by his proper title, an absurd demand given he no longer officially held such a position, Severus turned back, one hand on the doorknob. “Yes?”

“You hurt her,” Potter began calmly, his expression deadly serious. “I will kill you and make it look like an accident.”

Severus raised an eyebrow. “My word, Potter,” he responded mildly. “I didn’t think you had it in you.”

Potter grinned. “I have to make up for all the times you threatened to poison us at some point, don’t I,  _ Professor _ ?” Snorting in amusement, Severus waved a wordless goodbye and then he was gone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title comes from the song [Paradise Is You](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYwqTfXebBc&list=OLAK5uy_leFNheP7faKGAUkAMzG4HqiKyS9xtlC-0&index=5&t=0s).


	19. Chapter 18 - (If Paradise Is) Half as Nice

He’d spent less time with Potter than he thought. It was barely eleven thirty by the time he unlocked the door to Hermione’s house. It felt odd, just letting himself in like this, even knowing he had her explicit permission. As curious as he was, he resolved not to explore. The last thing he wanted was for her to think he was snooping.

Unfortunately, he couldn’t sit still. His mind was racing with possibilities. He found a bookcase in the living room and he’d tried to read to pass the time, but he couldn’t focus. After the third failed attempt, he made his way to the kitchen. Hermione had mentioned sharing a late lunch. Surely she didn’t mind if he fixed up something for them to eat. He frowned when he looked inside her cupboards. There wasn’t much, and what there was seemed to be more along the line of those nasty Muggle meal replacement bars. Under stasis charms he discovered a fine collection of takeaway containers, a shelf full of condiments, and a sad looking head of lettuce. 

Luckily as he moved various cartons around, he noticed a box of eggs that appeared to be relatively fresh. He was just contemplating what he could scrounge up for some omelets when the front door slammed shut. Severus jumped, barely managing to set the eggs down without dropping them before reaching for his wand. “Who’s there?” a voice called out, sounding concerned. 

“Hello?” Severus called back, not recognizing the voice but also having no reason to hide. Presumably this was also someone who had the ability to get past the protection around the property. 

“What the…?” A red haired man walked into the room, wand extended and pointed at Severus. He furrowed his brow, as if trying to place him. “Snape?”

Severus nodded in greeting. “Weasley.”

Weasley didn’t lower his wand. “What are you doing here?”

Placing his wand on the counter to signal that he was not a threat, Severus reached into his pocket and pulled out the key Hermione gave him. “I was invited. And you are here because…”

Weasley narrowed his eyes, though he lowered his wand. “Because my son lives here part of the time and he just discovered he left something behind when he was packing for school. And I’m getting it for him because his mother has more pressing matters to attend to and I am happy to pick up the slack.” He looked defiantly at Severus, as if demanding that he challenge him. “That’s how co-parenting works.”

“I see,” Severus said simply. He wasn’t quite sure what to say and he felt it would be best not to risk stepping in anything he’d be better to avoid.

“But why are you here?” Weasley asked. “According to Hermione you had no desire to ever set foot in this country again.”

Severus pursed his lips. “Things change.”

Weasley crossed his arms, fixing him with a stare. “Look, Snape. I don’t know what you’re playing at here. And I know that I of all people don’t have any authority to dictate who Hermione gets involved with beyond making sure my kids are safe. But despite everything, Hermione will always mean the world to me, and I’m not about to sit by and watch her get dragged around.”

“I have no intention of doing anything of the kind,” Severus assured him, hoping he masked his annoyance well enough. He probably would never like Weasley, but he was the father of Hermione’s kids, and he did want to at least be civil with one another.

Weasley scoffed. “Then what do you call your desire for perpetual long distance? Do you have a local girl on the side? Younger than you, of course,” he sneered.

“I assure you, Hermione is the only woman, and indeed person I am currently involved with or want to be involved with. Aside from that, the particulars of our relationship are none of your concern.”

“This is still my family,” Weasley asserted stubbornly. “It’s always going to be my concern.”

Severus sighed. “Then rest assured that you have nothing to fear. Unless of course you’ve tired of your little experiment and want her back?” Weasley flushed red, sputtering incoherently. Severus mentally kicked himself. “I spoke without thinking, I apologize.”

Weasley looked, if anything, more flabbergasted by his apology than by the insult. His features softened a bit and he let out a low sigh. “Blimey,” he whispered, sounding almost awed. “You really have changed.”

“I have no desire to insult you or cause any trouble for your family,” Severus replied, wanting to mend fences and move forward. “I just want Hermione to be happy. And far be it for me to bring discord into her life.”

Weasley rubbed his neck awkwardly. “I was kind of going after you,” he admitted sheepishly. “It’s just...I have a hard time separating my image of you from school and this,” he said, gesturing absently at Severus. “No offense, but I still can’t figure out Hermione’s interest in you.”

Severus smiled wryly. “You and me both.”

Weasley shook his head. “You were awful to her back then. There were so many times I fantasized about murdering you with my bare hands in retaliation. I just can’t bear the thought of you speaking like that to her, of you treating her like trash.”

Severus winced. “Our relationship now is nothing like what you remember, I can assure you. Apart from not having my mission looming over my head, we’re equals. If anything, she holds all the cards. I’ve expressed my regret at my behavior back then to her and I’ll say it again to you. It seemed like what was necessary at the time to complete my objectives, but I wish it didn’t come at the expense of my students. Even you, Weasley. Look. I can’t say that I am a different man; I’ll live with all my mistakes the rest of my life. But I’ve dedicated every day of the past twenty-one years to being a better man, and I’ll commit to that goal for the rest of my life. Now then,” he said, returning to the discarded carton of eggs. “I was going to try and scrounge up something to make an omelette. Would you like some?” He remembered what Hermione had mentioned about Weasley being food motivated.

Weasley groaned. “Don’t tell me, that’s the closest she has to real food in there.”

Severus pulled out the wilting lettuce. “There’s also this.”

Ron shook his head. “When Hugo was still home she made an effort at keeping some real food in the house, but with him away at school and she’s always so busy…” He winced. “I used to do all the cooking. I just had more flexibility than she did.” He turned to the door. “I’ll be back.”

Severus frowned. “Back from…?”

“My place, Viktor and I are just down the road. I’ll go find something actually edible.”

Despite himself, a small smile formed on Severus’ lips. It was nice to see that despite everything, Weasley still cared about Hermione. And it was an added bonus knowing that he wasn’t a threat for her affection. “You needn’t go through the trouble, if you could point me towards the nearest market I’d be happy to-”

Weasley shook his head. “No, if Hermione asked you to wait here, you should stay here. I’ll just be a minute.”

“She’s very lucky to have someone like you looking out for her,” Severus said before Weasley left. 

Weasley, for his part, looked Severus up and down. “She’s lucky that she’s found someone who makes her happy in a way I couldn’t.” With that, he disappeared down the hall, the door shutting firmly behind him.

* * *

Hermione frowned as she walked in the door. She distinctly heard voices, as in plural. Only Severus was supposed to be here. Gripping her wand just in case, Hermione crept towards the sounds coming from the kitchen.

The sight that met her eyes was the last thing that she ever expected to see. Ron was pulling a casserole out of the oven while Severus added the last additions to a tossed salad. She would have burst out laughing if she wasn’t so much in shock.

Ron tuned to her, grinning as if this was nothing out of the ordinary. “Right on time!”

“What’s all this?” Hermione asked, awed.

“Lunch,” Severus said, smirking. 

Hermione narrowed his eyes at Ron. “You haven’t been gossipping about my eating habits, have you?”

“Your cupboard did all the talking,” Severus replied. “Weasley was kind enough to bring over something that was actually edible.”

Hermione rolled her eyes. “You try running the government and on top of that having to keep house, then get back to me,” she snapped. This was the last thing she wanted to be thinking about right now.

“Now would probably not be the time to suggest a house elf…” Ron replied cheekily, eyes teasing.

Hermione didn’t bother to hide her eye roll. Ron was deliberately trying to get under her skin and she was not in the mood for it. “What are you even doing here, Ron?”

Wiping his hands on a towel, Ron grinned sheepishly. “Hugo sent me a list of things he’s suddenly discovered he forgot to pack. He thought some of it was in his room here. And then, well.” He nodded to Severus, who was intently slicing a gorgeous grainy loaf of bread. “We started getting better acquainted.” Hermione had to admit, it seemed to be true. There didn’t seem to be the hostility between the two men that she’d expected, that she’d feared when she dared dream of bringing Severus into her family. 

“As lovely as it is to see you both getting on so well, Severus and I have a lot we need to discuss, and I could only get away for an hour.”

Face reddening slightly, Ron nodded. “I’ll just run up to Hugo’s room and I’ll be out of your hair.” Turning to Severus, he held out his hand. “Welcome back.”

Looking a little startled, Severus shook his hand. He gave her a small smile as Ron ducked out of the room. “Hey,” he said in a soft voice.

All of the annoyance she’d felt melted away, and she couldn’t stop a huge grin forming on her face. Severus was here, in her kitchen, making her lunch. That they would eat together.

“You have to go back?” Severus asked, reaching for plates, his movements making it seem as if he’d been cooking here forever. The sight made something in her heart ache.

Hermione shook her head. “I just said that to get Ron to leave,” she said, voice as quiet as possible. “This needs to just be the two of us for now.”

The way Severus lit up at her words made her heart do somersaults. “I’d like that.”

They stood in a nervous silence, both smiling at each other but seeming not to know how to proceed. The impasse was broken with Ron’s return a few minutes later. “Alright, I’m off.”

“Oh, wait, Ron?” Hermione called, realizing that this would save her a trip. “There’s something you both need to know.”

Ron frowned. “What’s that?”

“I asked Harry to look into how Rita Skeeter tracked Severus down,” Hermione explained for Ron’s benefit. “He found me after my meeting. They finally found the leak.”

Ron let out a low whistle. “Anyone we know?”

Hermione shook her head. “Someone on my mail screening team.”

Ron frowned. “I thought they all checked out? Didn’t you have a thorough review after the Howlers got through?”

“I did,” Hermione nodded. “But one of them wasn’t as squeaky as we thought. Apparently Rita had dirt on him and was blackmailing him to do her bidding. He thought he was in the clear after things quieted down and he didn’t get caught, but apparently he flipped almost as soon as Harry started asking questions. And he had evidence. He’d made copies of all their correspondence, including where he mentioned the return address of one of my recent packages.”

Severus winced. “I shouldn’t have sent that, I knew you had concerns about the post…”

Hermione shook her head. “Honestly, Severus, this is the best birthday present you could have given me. Rita Skeeter has been a thorn in my side since 1994, and now we have enough evidence to bring her down for good. Harry’s arresting her as we speak.”

Ron frowned. “You know she’s just going to claim she’s being silenced.”

Hermione pursed her lips. “Let her try. She broke about ten laws explicitly, at least two of which posed a threat to my family and people I care about. I don’t even care what she tries to write. Let her make herself out to be the martyr. We have the truth and the facts on our side, as any reputable reporter will be able to see.”

“Blimey,” Ron whispered in awe. “Remind me not to get on your bad side.”

Hermione snorted. “You’ve been there often enough to know that by now.”

“True,” Ron agreed. “Unless there’s anything else, I’ll leave you two.” He nodded towards Severus. “Snape.”

“Weasley.”

With a little wave, Ron let himself out.

“I’m so sorry,” Hermione started as soon as she heard the door shut behind him. “I hope he didn’t give you any grief.”

“Oh, he did,” Severus assured her, but he looked more amused than annoyed. “But it wasn’t anything I couldn’t handle or didn’t have an answer for.” He walked over and took both of her hands, smiling softly as he gazed into her eyes. “Hello.”

Hermione grinned, feeling like a teenager again. “Hello yourself.” She shook her head. “I can’t believe this is real. You. Here.”

“You’d better believe it,” Severus replied, his breath warm against her skin as he pulled her close, kissing her tenderly. It was gentle, almost languid. It felt so different than all of those other times that they had kissed. There had always been a sense of urgency, of borrowed time. Now it felt like they had all the time in the world. And it was even better.

“Hmm,” she moaned as they parted, though Severus hugged her close. “I could get used to this.”

“Yeah?” he asked, nervousness creeping into his voice. 

“That’s what you were saying before, isn’t it? Before I got called away?” Hermione asked, pulling back to look at him. “Building a life together?”

Severus nodded. “If you’ll have me.”

Hermione smiled at him tenderly, tucking a bit of hair behind his ears. “Without question or reserve.” She looked him right in the eyes. “About before. I’m glad you weren’t trying to propose.”

“Oh?” Severus asked, clearly trying not to look hurt. 

“Because there’s so much between where we are and marriage,” she explained quickly. “I want to enjoy this. And I need to make sure that this is right.”

Severus gave her a quizzical look. “You have doubts?”

“That I love you? Absolutely not,” she assured him. “But I was totally and completely in love with Ron too, and look how that turned out.”

“I can assure you that I’m not going to suddenly discover any latent homosexual tendencies,” Severus said dryly. 

Hermione snorted. “That’s not what I’m worried about.”

Sighing, Hermione turned away, pacing around the room hugging herself. “I have kids. What if you hate them? What if they hate you? What if being in the same place changes how things are between us?”

Severus placed his hands on her shoulder, halting her motion. He began to rub at them gently, relaxing her muscles with his touch. “Of course things will be different at short range. That doesn’t mean they have to be bad.”

“I know,” Hermione sighed, turning to face him. “And I don’t think they will be. But we have to be realistic.”

“And we will be,” Severus assured her. “As for the kids, well, I think that the little I’ve interacted with them has gone well, haven’t you?” Hermione nodded. “And they’re not just any kids, they’re your kids. How could I hate them? And if they have a problem with me? Well, that just means I’ll have to work harder at winning them over.”

Hermione smiled weakly. “I think Hugo’s already onboard. Rosie’s more skeptical about the whole thing.”

Severus grinned slyly. “Then we’re already halfway there.” He stroked her cheek gently. “I learned long ago that dwelling on future possibilities only leads to paralysis. We’ll face whatever comes tomorrow when it comes.”

“But what about your life? The cafe? Penny?”

“Penny is certainly capable of running the place. And she’s already told me that she is more than willing.”

Hermione narrowed her eyes. “That’s not what I meant and you know it.”

“Look,” Severus said, taking her hand and leading her to the sofa. “I started that place because I was going stir crazy. I needed to stay busy, I needed something entirely different from what I fled.” He kissed her softly. “I don’t need a distraction anymore.”

“But they’re your family.”

“You’re my family too,” Severus insisted. “And there’s no reason that they can’t visit. And we can holiday there. I won’t sell anything.”

“It seems silly to leave that whole big house sitting there empty.”

Severus shrugged. “I’ll ask Penny and Ace if they’d like it. I know they’d been talking about finding somewhere they could stay long term when their lease comes up.”

“You’ve really thought of everything.”

“It was a long flight.”

Hermione frowned. “You flew?”

“I didn’t want to risk reaching out to try and arrange a portkey. Besides, my thought process had bypassed logic at that point, truth be told.”

Hermione looked at him tentatively. “I know that part of your reasoning included Rita Skeeter as a factor. But she’s out of the picture now. You could go back and live a peaceful life. It’s not like you’ll be able to live in obscurity if you are associating with me here.”

Severus shook his head. “What’s to stop someone else from putting the pieces together?”

“Harry is tightening up my security detail,” Hermione replied.

“More and more people know I’m alive. And charm or no, at least several people saw me today. Somehow or another someone would track me down again. I don’t want that hanging over my head. I’ve spent the majority of my life as a pawn in someone else’s game. Like I said earlier, I’m done hiding. I want my triumphant return to be on my own terms. Besides,” he said, eyes glinting with mirth. “If I’m not around, who is going to make sure you’re eating properly?”

Hermione snorted. “Apparently I have a type.”

“I don’t mind taking care of you,” Severus replied. “In fact, it would be my greatest honor and privilege.” He looked nervous again. “I don’t know how you feel about potentially having any more children, but if you were open to the idea…I’d be there for all of it.”

“Kids?” she asked, a little startled. “I never would have thought that was something you wanted.”

Severus shrugged. “I used to think it was for the best. And maybe this is crazy. But you’ve made me consider things I never would have before. So why not this?”

“Well then,” Hermione said with a cheeky grin, pulling him in close. “We’d better get a move on getting accustomed to each other then. The clock is ticking.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The title of this chapter comes from the song [(If Paradise Is) Half As Nice](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xiWre8UTCjo).
> 
> Only the epilogue to go!


	20. Epilogue - Paradise Found

“Ah, here it is, Hermione said, unfurling the newspaper, folding it back so she could focus on the article in question and began to read.

“Minister of Magic, Hermione Granger, Order of Merlin First Class is pleased to announce her engagement to Severus Snape, Order of Merlin, First Class and former professor and wartime headmaster of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The couple, who met by chance a year ago while the Minister was on holiday, look forward to an intimate spring wedding with close friends and family. Granger, who began her second term as Minister last month with overwhelming support, wishes to assure the public that the developments in her personal life will in no way impact her ability to serve the Wizarding community. And those who might fear that her husband-to-be might sweep her off for a honeymoon will be happy to know that Mr. Snape has recently opened a new sweet shop just in time for Christmas, which will take up all his spare time. For more on The Witches Brew, which is co-owned by your author’s brother, Ron Weasley, turn to page eleven.”

Severus placed his hands on her shoulders, looking past her. “Ginny did a good job.”

Hermione nodded, watching their black and white selves smiling at each other, oblivious to the camera. “And that’s such a nice picture of us, I should see if we can get a print.”

“Ask after the wedding,” Severus advised. “Otherwise she might think that’s enough of a wedding present.”

Hermione waved him off. “We don’t need any presents,” she insisted. “We’ve got each other, what else do we need?”

“A proper stand mixer,” Severus muttered. 

“Which you can certainly afford for yourself, it’s not like we’re a young couple just starting off.”

Severus sat down next to her, smiling sheepishly. “It’s easy to forget sometimes.”

Hermione rolled her eyes at him. “I still can’t get used to you being cheesy.”

Severus snorted. “Says the woman who just described our relationship in the most cliched manner possible.”

Hermione shook her head, grinning as she sipped her juice. “Why am I marrying you again?”

Severus closed the space between them and kissed her tenderly. “Because you love us,” he replied, letting his hand rest on her belly. She’d only recently started showing, though through the magic of wizarding attire only she and Severus had noticed.

“Hmm,” she hummed, pulling away reluctantly. “I really do.” She placed her hand over his. “I know we’re already a family, but I can’t wait to make it official.”

“Neither can I,” he admitted, looking bashful. “I’m nervous about today.”

Hermione frowned. “Why? It will be nice for everyone to know.”

Severus smiled tightly. “Yes, well. I suspect your friends and family might feel differently about our impending nuptials when they find out that I impregnated you.”

Turning to face Severus, Hermione gave him a serious look. “First of all, they are  _ our  _ friends and family. Second of all, everyone at that party is there to celebrate our engagement. They wouldn’t be coming otherwise. They’ll be happy for us.”

Sighing, Severus shook his head. “I know you’re right,” he admitted.

“Then we’re off to a fine start already,” Hermione quipped, grinning. She needed to keep him talking. It kept him from brooding.

“I just...I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. I just can’t believe that I’m allowed to be this happy.”

“You are,” Hermione said firmly, wishing she could wipe away all his insecurities but knowing that all she could do was be there for him. “And we are. And we get to be happy together. How does that sound?”

Severus gave her a crooked grin, his dark eyes twinkling in the way they did only for her. 

“Heavenly.”

_ The End _


End file.
